Tha Bull Pen

(Sad Face Here)

2012-01-13T12:59:00.000-08:00

Yaaaoooooww! What's going on ya?

This one is funny. To me at least. Lol.
So the other mornin I was chillen with my homegirl and we were talkin about a lot of things. One thing in particular that stood out, in fact the only thing that stood out was when she said "You're sad.... cause you're single." Lmfaooo!
What the hell does that mean?

I decided I wanted to touch on the subject cause I'm sure there's a million people like me out there, single and chillen, so why not discuss it right?
So basically we chillen and somehow the topic of relationships come about. She mentioned hers and seems soooo happy about it! Lol, I'm being sarcastic in case you didn't pick up on that. So I say to her, "All you people in relationships make me happy to be single" and she replies with "No, you're sad, cause you're single?" What nigga? Lol I really found this shit amusing. So I say to her: "But you not happy. You the sad one." She say back to me "Yeah, but it's crazy, when you single you're depressed cause you have no one, and then when you're with someone you get tired and then you're depressed cause you wanna be single"

Allow me to step away from this subject for a second and explain that this is EXACTLY why I say women are confused creatures that don't know what they want. Lol

So I respond back with a blank stare and then ask: "Whaaaaaaaat?" With that Bill Cosby face.

So she then goes on to mention that I MUST want a relationship cause all my peers have girlfriends. News flash baby, I aint the type to jump off a brige cause my friends did it. But I let her have it, so let's just get away from that for a second and lemme break a few things down. Yes all of my peers have girlfriends, as a matter of fact I am the last single man I know. Crazy right? But wait, maybe it's not crazy, maybe I'm the genius here, cause all I have around me is people tellin me "Stay Single my nigga" Lol

I of course won't mention names but I've seen fights worse than MGM Grand in Vegas with these people in relationships, serious break ups and make ups, the whole "Fuck that bitch, I'm tired of her," and claims of headaches that should be covered by some sort of insurance. Lol I could go on forever. So what is the real deal? Why not just keep goin on the way I have been? Lovin a different woman every weekend, comin and going as I please care free with no headaches and no one to check in with? One of my homies even said that havin a girl is like going from one mother to another. Another told me: "Sometimes I be mad happy with my girl, but then she's the same one that drives me to cheat. She blows mine and I fugure, fuck it. I might as well cheat if I'm being accused of cheatin" Lol, Nah G!

^Look at this^

One of those girls in a relationship still

gave me her number, and look how

that turned out. Lol

I mean, like I told my homegirl, "Yeah I wouldn't mind having someone, but lack thereof doesn't make me sad." I'd rather be alone and content than with someone and constricted.
Keep it a hunnit, how many of ya are in a relationship in which the cons out weigh the pros? How many of ya done cheated multiple times in the last month alone? How many of ya say ya happy but in all reality ya just bored and ready to move on, but you don't because it would be an inconvenience to start all over agin with someone else? How many of ya be thinkin "I mean I do love her/him so I don't just wanna leave" but then hide your phone so that he/she won't see that text from the mistress or side piece?
Basically what I'm sayin here is, don't assume that because someone is single they are sad the same way I don't see you with someone and assume you're happy. As long as condoms are on the racks I can't be sad. Lolol. Do I yearn for someone? Yes I do, and someday I will have her, however right now I'm not ready for the headaches and the "Where are you? Who you with? And hat ya doing?" texts, I'm not ready to fall in and out of love in the matter of 4 months, and become comfortable so I cheat because I can and don't leave cause there's time and emotion invested.

Look at your situation and realize who the "sad" one is. As for me *gets text message*.... Welp, my Tuesday hoe just hit me! LMFAO! I'm outta here man. Take it easy ya'll!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Wedding Bells. Now What?

2012-01-13T11:15:00.000-08:00

Yaaaooooww!

What's goin on Bull Penners? First and foremost, welcome. To what? To this, my new blog. I dropped the ".blogspot", yeah I know, about time. So now it's just www.ThaBullPen.com (did you click that link?) Lol. I have no idea why it still shows it in the browser window when you click it but I'll fix that later.

Anyway, now that we're all situated, let's get into it.
I'm not a huge fan of Reality TV aside from "Real World" and this year I couldn't even get into the current season. However one show that I came to enjoy last year was "Love and Hip-Hop." Could be because for once, at least that I could remember a rapper is behind the whole thing. Or it could be because music, especially Hip-Hop and women are amongst my highest interests. This show has both off those combined with a sight twist of niggadom. Don't judge me. So if you're not familiar with the show I strongly suggest you google it, I ain't about to sit here and break it down to you.

So recently, although I haven't been following the show as strongly as I did last year, I have been getting a few updates here and there from a good friend of mine.
Good thing I haven't been following, because apparently this season Jim Jones' lady has been going harder than ever trying to get him to marry her. This is where my topic will begin. You ready?

Ladies, have a seat let's chop it up. Please explain to me why, Why? WHY?
Why is it soooooooooo important to ya to be married?
I'm sure I've touched on this topic before, but never from this angle, so just bare with me for a minute or two. So by now you've probably answered my question in your head. Right? Well lemme tell you, that answer is not only cliche, but it's just plain fantasy.

Check this out, I'm very well aware that for you the sole purpose of marriage is simply to say that the last piece of your puzzle has been placed. I'm sure ya haven't even realized that have ya? Think about it, since birth you've had TV shows, movies, and Walt Disney telling you that you had to 1. grow up, 2. find Prince Charming and 3. get Happily ever after. Am I right or am I wrong?
Okay, that's all well and good, but let's go back to Jimmy and his lady for a second. You see Jim Jones is a man, who for whatever reason, does not seem to want to be married. His lady has asked her aunt on her opinion as to what she should do. Has had her uncle talk to Jimmy in reference to the matter and even went as far as proposing to him. WHAT?! Yea, crazy thing is on the show Jim Jones mentions that initially he wasn't even the one who approached her when they first met for the first time. "Ummmm, Hello, Knock Knock, Anybody Home? Think McFly, Think!"
From the gate this man hasn't been the one to step up to relationship, that should have been an indication as to what type of guy he is. The type of guy that doesn't do the marriage thing. Which leads me to my next question: Why desire a marriage so much with someone who doesn't share the sentiment. That has always been a killer for me.
Maybe it's my pride issue, but I'm the type of person that doesn't even want to accept a ride from someone who I know doesn't want to give it. I'd rather wait for a cab or even take the bus than to inconvenience you. I don't want to bone a girl who doesn't want to bone me. So I'd rather move on to the next than to keep knockin on a closed door like that. So this is why I cannot understand how for two seasons now Chrissy (Jim's fiance) has stuck around still beating a dead horse.
Am I making any sense? Again, don't get me wrong here, I feel marriage is a beautiful thing, but it's also something you should be cautious with, it's not something that you should force on anyone. I mean do you even think it'll be real if it's forced?

I think one thing you women fail to realize is that once that final puzzle piece is in place it's really "Happily (sometimes) Ever After." And I know you're thinkin, "well yeah, that's the point, that's great..." but do you not realize that ever Fairy Tale ending ends in "Happily Ever After" because after, there is nothing more to tell. What is "Happily Ever After" really? There's no such thing as "happily Ever After" in real life. In real Life it's more like: "And so they were married, and....." *roll credits.* Yeah, that's right, a cliff hanger with no explanation as to how the sequel will go. Lol, and I KNOW you would hate that at the theatre right? So why accept that fate in real life?

I guess when its all said and done, this blog goes back to two big questions.
1. Why force a man into marriage? What makes you think that it'll all be Wedded Bliss if he's forced?
and
2. Once you're actually married, then what?

Lol, if you can answer those for me and not mention money or that whole "Well I need to know that I'll be taken care of in the unfortunate event of his death".... Believe me I've heard it, then I will applaud you. Until then, shut up, sit down, and enjoy the fact you have a Boyfriend! Lol

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

Takers

2012-01-09T16:48:00.000-08:00

Yaoooooowww!

For those of ya living under a rock, I wanted to share with ya that my team BXL is droppin a mixtape this Friday, January 13th entitled "Takers." You don't wanna miss this one, I promise it's a problem.

^Shouts to Weapon X^

with the Photography

Follow the team on Twitter/FaceBook:

@SevereJones/Severe Jones

@JoeDirt730/Joe Sucio

@BuddyMylez/Buddy Mylez

@BXLMusic/BXL Music

Go git that!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

My Creative Eye

2012-01-02T09:43:00.000-08:00

So a few weeks back Chris (CFK) -- If you don't know who that is, you must be new here and I recommend you do your research.) But a few weeks back he initiated a proposal in which he asked challenged all his photographer friends, himself included to take a picture everyday for the rest of the year and for the rest of their lives. I of course accepted the challenge and with that said, I figured it was only fitting to make the first post of 2012 the announcement of the challenge.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/48199448@N04/sets/72157628683244937/

So if you're not following my Flickr account, please bookmark the page and stay tuned with the challenge. Happy New Year Bull Penners!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

The Last Year

2011-12-30T13:21:00.000-08:00

Yo, what's going on Bull Penners? Can ya believe that it's been about 12 months already sine the ball dropped in on 2011? What have ya done with the time? Lol, don't answer that, cause I probably wouldn't answer if I were being asked.

By now I'm sure ya can kinda see where I'm going with it, Yeah, exactly, this is my "Year in review" blog post. Although I'm not talking about national (News) or current events, nor am I discussing the whole year. However there has been change in my life since January of this year. I went back and forth with myself debating whether or not I was gonna even post one of these but at the end of the day I have to remember that this blog serves as a personal journal and I'd like to come back to it someday and remember the things that are fresh in my head at this moment. There was a few great moments for me in 2011, but I just wanna discuss 2 in particular.
So travel for a second with me:

What do ya know about FreeMasonry? Matter fact, don't answer that either, cause I'm not tryna hear all the YouTube and Google speculators throw in their two cents. But anyway, I have a cousin who became a Mason about a year and a half-two years ago and even shortly before that I had been considering getting into the brotherhood.
So I would ask him from time to time how I can be down. Shortly after, as life finds it's own ways, I found myself at a Lodge of Ancient and Free Accepted Masons.

August:
So I met with the brothers in August, to discuss a few things as far as being involved was concerned. I met with the Worshipful Master, Senior and Junior Warden, and a few of my (now) other brothers. I was comfortable with them and the idea of being a member of their fraternity. So I came home and waited to be called back.

September:
A short month later, I was accepted into the fraternity and all the beautiful things that can be learned were learned. I used to hear people say things like: "Yeah, Masonry is the most beautiful thing in the world" and men would say "Oh, best thing I ever did with my life," and it's not until you're in it, that you see why. I was never the type to believe the hype that you hear and read on the internet, so I felt I needed to be in it to win it. And, Now I'm in it.

November:
So a few quick months after being accepted, I became a Master Mason. Boy was it hard work, but I made it. For the first time in my life I felt like I was in "School" and actually liking it. All I've learned has been so insightful and fulfilling. I know it sounds a lil over dramatic, but like I said, you gotta be in it to understand where I'm comin from.

So now here I am a Master Mason, I see the world differently than the average. Lol, am I bull shittin? Wouldn't you like to know?

^Peep Game^

November:

Moving on to the very next week following the weekend I became a master, I finally found myself back into the world of regular employment. I had gotten an interview about a month prior to fill the position of 'Mail Clerk' for 'Yahoo,' yes, thee Yahoo, the internet company. Lol people's eye brows tend to go up about an inch when I tell em that and it's always followed by some genuinely interested questioning. For those of ya who have wondered the job is pretty normal. It's a lot to remember but over all its a fairly simply job. I love it so effin much and I'm finally officially out of retail. No more stupid ass customers unfloding all the clothes I've folded, no more stupid questions from people who are too dumb to think for themselves. And Finally I have a desk and a stead 8:30am-5:30pm schedule from Monday to Friday. And let's not forget to add the fact that I get paid a whopping--Hrmph-Hrmph, excuse me..... Lol, yeah wouldn't you like to know? Let's just say I comfortably made Christmas happen for me and my fam.

Speaking of which

December:

Christmas was pretty coo. I'm older now so it's not as much a big deal as it was when I was a kid, plus for those of us that are old enough, we know, Christmas is the time of year when you become Santa Clause and you go broke. Lol. But it worked out well. I got my brother and myself some Jordans and I got myself some "Beats by Dre"headphones. All in all it was a great holiday.

How was ya Holiday?

^All I want for Christmas^

is You!

I got Mine Nigga! Ha!

As far as the rest of the year goes, Photography is still going great in case you were wondering. And now with steady pay I can build my empire even faster than before. A trip outta state once or twice. We went to Atlanta, and Ohio. It was a great look. A year older, and wiser, I mean you been reading the blog right? You know how my year has been better than I do! Lol be safe out there folks. They say this is the last year of life (If you believe that.) Just live it up.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

She's a Freak!

2011-12-28T19:58:00.000-08:00

Yaaaaooooowww!

So earlier today a random though came into my head. You know when that happens it must mean a blog post is brewing in my head.

[DISCLAIMER: This post is intended to make you laugh but it can come off a lil serious and borderline offensive. If you are the type to offend easy, please leave now!]

So earlier today I had a random thought. You know 73.6% of the time those lead to a blog post right? Lol. So I said on twitter:
"There's a few different way to determine whether or not shorty is a freak"
You know the ladies took the bait right? Lol. So they were askin me things like "Please do tell" and "How can you know?" I simply replied to them: "I'll blog about it" and so now, without any further adieu, these are the 5 determinin' factors in finding out whether or not shorty is freakin off (In no particular order.)

1. Girls with One letter Names:
(Even if you spell it out) That's right, we all know em Lol. These are the girls we call 'Dee', 'Jay', 'Kay', 'Em' (short for Emily), 'Q', 'T' and 'V'. These girls freak off and there's really no explanation as to why they do it. Lol Now it is important to remember not to confuse these with girls who have one syllable names, now those girls are fun, however they don't all freak off. So there you have it. Girls with one letter names. Q, call me girl!

2. Girls that hate Wearing Clothes:
You know about these? They walk around the house bucket nekit (given there is no company) and they have very little clothes. They don't necessarily dress slutty but they usually cannot wait to get home and get naked! You may even hear em slip up and say it some time. The most she wears around the house is boy shorts and there's no way in hell she is coming out of the house if she is already "comfortable" if you get my drift! Lol, No clothes = Freakin Off!

3. Girls with Children
Children are living, walking, and talking proof that shorty bones raw! Get mad if you want ladies but that's exactly what it means! Lmfao! I now know that you went raw AT LEAST (the amount of kids she has here) times. Ha!

4. Girls that Smoke
We've all heard it: "If she smokes she pokes." No need to go any further with this one, it's a scientifically proven fact, moving on!

5. Girls that get Brazillians
Think about it for a second b... Why else would she be gettin her whole joint completely hairless like Dr. Evil's kitty if she wasn't plannin on puttin the kitty on a nigga. Lmfao!

* So yeah I've given them to you all! Fellas pay more attention, look for these things when you dealin with a girl and take it from there. Enjoy.

Honorable Mention
Girls who Live with their Grandparents
If shorty live with "Wela" and "Welo" or "Grandma" and "Grandpa" or just one of the two but not her parents she is Freakin Off, simple and plain. Don't believe me? Find you a nice young lady who lives with her grandparents. Good Night.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

New Era Old Ways

2011-12-28T10:42:00.000-08:00

What's going on Bull Penners? How ya livin? Me? Oh, I'm doing very well thank you. Have a seat let's talk about these mean streets for a minute.

For those of ya who have been here with me since day one, you know that I am a huge SneakerHead. I sort of "left the game" for a while but this is something that has been in my heart since I was a kid. Yeah it sounds a little dramatic and over the top, but I'm just callin a spade a spade.
So last week was the 3rd release of the Air Jordan XI "Concords" (fourth if you consider the Defining Moments Package from 2006) and as history tends to repeat itself a few people apparently were harmed, some even fatally over these sneakers. All of this brought some sort of hate to Mr. Michael Jordan on my FaceBook feeds. I would quote some of the statuses of the people who are upset but I'm choosing to be lazy and pretty much go off the top.
So basically what seemed to be the consensus yesterday on my feeds were things like "When has Jordan ever done anything for the hood?" and "Wow, people going crazy over these sneakers and Jordan never did anything for ya"
Wow? Really? Aight let's talk about it then.
You're probably all right, *that we know of* Jordan probably hasn't done anything for the community. And I say "that we know of"because there are thousands of people that give back each day and don't go out of their way to promote it. So we don't know wether or not Jordan has ever done anything, but for the sake of this discussion let's say that he actually hasn't. Fine, here's the skinny.
Michael Jordan is a BUSINESS man. Before we go any further let's take a look at the definition of the word Business.

business

[biz-nis]: a person, partnership, or corporation engaged in commerce, manufacturing, or a service; profit-seeking enterprise or concern.
**Sited: http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/business

Now please correct me if I'm wrong, but nowhere in that definition, nor in any other that you will find does it mention anything about charity. Correct? And why do you think that is? I'll tell you why, because it's not a part of the idea of "Business." Yes it is appreciated and sometime expected by rich people to give back to the communities from which they came, however it is not a requirement. So getting upset at Jordan cause he hasn't built a park for your children to play in is nothing more than displaced anger. I'm sure a lot of you are still upset that kids died and were robbed for their sneakers. I am as well however let's look at the play from all angles. Is Jordan really to blame? NO! You know who's to blame? The people who do these crimes. Stop pointing fingers at the ones who are making money and point the fingers at the creatures that are going out to do dirt. That's no different than blaming Eminem for the suicide of some kid somewhere in the middle of God knows where just because said child bought an Eminem CD and heard him say something about slitting his wrist. That's a song that has just been sung waaay too many times. I hate that shit, people are no longer thinking for themselves and the blame is spread all over the place instead of being slapped right back on the one responsible.

But before I digress let's get back to Jordan. I believe the argument was him not giving back to the hood right? Okay, so let's play a game, name me all the celebrities that DO give back. And of those how many are still: selling out concerts, or having their music fly off the shelves, which ones are still selling clothing like there is no other brand. Oh, no, take your time, I'll wait. EXACTLY!

*That we know of* Jay-Z hasn't done much for Brooklyn recently has he? Aside from mentioning the borough in a few songs he has not, and let's be real here, Hov can afford to buy every resident in Marcy Projects a Mercedes-Benz s550. Yet we still choose to go out and buy his albums, he still sells out Madison Square Garden... The Garden, do you know how fuckin huge the Garden is? Why does no one come at Jay-Z and ask "Yo, how ya go buy his album and he aint done nuttin for you?"
*That we know of* Ralph Lauren doesn't give back to the Bronx, does he? No, but every nigga on my block thinks he is KILLIN it with his Rugby and Polo Boots. No one comes at Ralphies neck and ask, "Yo How ya go buy Polo and Polo don't do nuttin for ya?" Cause we know that Mr. Lauren can not only afford to rebuild our closet's physical dimension but fill it from top to bottom with Top notch quality threads. Am I right or am I wrong?

So where is all this hate really comin from? Are you mad that you didn't get your pair of Jays? Are you mad that you had to line up for 18 hours and when you got to the door your size was sold out? Well guess what that's not Jordans fault. You don't get mad at the company that produce Turkeys when you get the the supermarket on Thanksgiving morning and they're all sold out do you? All I'm sayin is, be a revolutionary across the board. If you mad at Jordan be mad at Hov, if you mad at Hov, be mad at Polo. Cause at the end of the day the only difference between the 3 are the names of the brand.

*And before I go I'll tell you why people don't ask about Hov and Polo, because deep down everyone knows that it's not their responsibility to give back to anyone. It's cruel to say it but Business is Business and business is Cruel. You have to take your personal and emotional feelings out of it whenever you're discussing it. Cause when its all said and done, no one puts a gun to your head and says "Gimme your money, go buy my product." No, society in our country is run by the economy. Make money! that's what it's all about, you go and buy what you choose to buy. So don't complain about the price. You don't like, you don't buy. Plain and simple, and if you just so happen to miss it, well then there's always next year.

Also, I hope ya realize that Jordan has indeed given back to Charities as has Jay-Z and Ralph Lauren. I mentioned what I mentioned for the sake of this discussion. So before you go and point fingers look at the 3 pointing back at you, and use em to type in "Google.com" in your web browser.
Don't Believe me? See for yourself: http://www.looktothestars.org/celebrity/527-michael-jordan

To those who tragically lost their lives on December 23rd, 2011, over a pair of sneakers my most humble and sincere apologies go out to you and your families. I do believe that it is ridiculous that it has even come to that again. Something that we haven't heard of since the early 90's is becoming a reality again, hence me saying at the beginning of all of this, "As history tends to repeat itself." So again, my condolences, for the rest of you, know where to point those fingers!

That's Game!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

The Seed, No Roots

2011-12-22T19:10:00.000-08:00

Earlier today I had a conversation with my brother about something that I'm just not ready to discuss with you today. However, from it, I came up with a quote that pertained to the subject discussed.

Ya know I don't usually do the short posts like that, but this is one of those that I would like to come back to someday and not lose right along with FaceBook, so while I'm at it, why not share it with ya!?

"Any man can plant a seed and watch a tree grow. But if he never took the time out to water and appreciate it, then he has no say when the lumber jack comes to chop it down" - Eno Bull

Feel free to speculate as to what this is in reference to. Lol, I however encourage you to apply it to yourself and your own life. take care.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Carry My Bags

2011-12-18T21:10:00.000-08:00

What's going on Bull Penners? I know its been a while and I've been a bit negligent, but it's been because I'm a working man again... Yup, 40 hours a week, Mon-Fri kinda thing. Yeah I know I know, thanks for all the congrats and stuff. Lol. But anyway, we'll discuss that some other time.

So the other day I was scrollin through my FaceBook and realized that a few of the girls on my feeds were pregnant. Big whoop right? I wasn't at all surprised, I mean after all, around these parts every season is mating season. But one in particular definitely caught my eye. Why? I'll tell you why, I was shocked cause this one in particular has got to be on her 5th or 6th child and she's my age (I'm 24 by the way.) To me that's crazy. It wouldn't be as crazy if they were all by the same guy, or even 2 guys but.... You see where I'm going with this right? Shit just aint cute no more.
Right, so anyway, this post is not about pregnancy and young girls with Brady Bunch families. It's more about the guys that deal with them, but more so about me.
See at one point, I would say maybe 2 or 3 years ago I was the guy that always said "I would never deal with a girl who got a kid/kids" and believe me I meant that. But then the other day I was thinkin how un realistic that can be. Granted it's not unrealistic at all, there is probably more single women without children then there is with, however, taking into consideration my environment and the women I'm attracted to, it's quite a task finding these gems. Allow me to explain. See naturally I tend to find myself attracted to women older than me, and most of the young women these days are pregnant by the time they're 17 or 18. So if you do the math, by the time I come across them they already have kids that are at least 7 or 8 years old. Lol.
And I used to think to myself, the reason I cant deal with a girl that got children is cause I'm not a fan of the idea of raising someone else's kids. I mean I don't even wash dishes that I didn't eat in, imagine raising the next mans seed.
But I guess part of getting older is a change in mindset. I say that because now I be thinkin, "Damn she bad.... Oh she got a kid? Aight well, let's see what's up." Granted I still have my reservations, and there's no way its gonna be anything further than just sex if she got 2 or 3 kids and better. See there were a few reasons I felt I couldn't commit to the mother of a child without a father. Primarily there was the fear of becoming attached to both of em and then having to break up with two people and not just one. Then there was always the fact that I don't wanna have to deal with another nigga that has to be in my lady's life regardless of anythin. And overall, call me old school but I feel that whatever kid I have should be the first for me and the female involved. All that good stuff. Now it's more like that saying "Any man can raise his kids, it takes a real man to take care of someone else's" That used to just be bullshit to me, but now it just may be what it is. I mean, it can't be that bad right? A lot of men have raised other peoples children, and those children eventually call those men "Dad." I guess what I'm saying is, I can understand how some dudes end up step fathers and I realize now that my thoughts might have been borderline fantasy, only time will tell if I become a step father someday, as for now I just know that my mind has changed a bit.
But for all of ya with multiple children and multiple baby fathers and babies on the way, USE SOME FUCKIN CONDOMS! Especially if you Mexican! Next time I get on the train and see an entire row of Mexican kids with a pregnant Mexican mother woman and a stroller at the end I'm gonna lose my mind. But I digress... I feel I made my point. Be safe ya!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned

Over Throwin Industry Suckas!

2011-11-29T04:23:00.000-08:00

I really don't have any words for this one, It doesn't need any words!
Check it out: The new "O.T.I.S" joint by @Deascent and @BuddyMylez
Click Play, Enjoy and comment!

^Brought to you by B.E. Media.

Follow my team.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

The Niggas Excuse

2011-11-10T08:00:00.000-08:00

Written a few weeks back, published today. Enjoy:
------------------------------------------------------------------

Sup my people? How was everyone's weekend? Mine was pretty effin cool. Started on Thursday night and has been action packed til tonight. Lol
However, this post has little to nothing to do with my weekend.

So the other night sitting at home surfin the web I saw my little brothers glued to the screen watching "Beef." For those of you who don't know "Beef" is a documentary series that follows either rappers or sometimes real life drug dealers or crime lords what have you, and it documents either a particular incident or series of incidents that these people have endured. Of course it's always a senseless and ignorant rap dispute or matter of someone getting shot. Often as a result of doing something that they shouldn't have been doing in the first place.
You know, last night I was at my aunt's house with a bunch of my cousins celebrating my uncle (their father's) 62nd birthday, and my cousin (who shall remain nameless incase she doesn't agree with me sharing this) said something along the lines of "Ahh, these kids, why bother teaching them...?" It may sound really harsh to you, but I agree with her and I'll come back to this point in a minute.

See on this particular episode of beef there was a rapper by the name of Obie Trice and he was sharing his story of how he was shot in the head and had to drive himself to the hospital. I'd be lying to you if I told you I knew how that all unraveled because quite frankly, that's all "Nigga News" and I have absolutely no interest in it what so ever. So along with Obie's interview there are interviews with people who I assume where there or are close enough to him to know what happened. This is where it gets interesting. I'm sure I'm contradicting myself because I just told you I have no interest in this stuff but here I am telling you I was somewhat intrigued. Lol, Bare with me here folks.
So amongst other things some of the things I hear are bullshit excuses as to why these people become involved with crime. Drug dealers, killers, rapist or whatever crime of choice these people have chosen as a path in life being justified with pure utter nonsense.

"You gotta understand where we come from. We come from da hood and we aint have nothin growin up"
"See such and such didn't have a father, so as a way of filling that void he did xy and z"
"We were poor, so of course he had to steal"

GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE MAN!
This is where I get upset. Granted, there are hardships in life, and many people have it harder than others. But please, for the love of God and everything that is Holy do not use these things as justifications for doing things that you KNOW for a fact are wrong. If through some strange outcome of circumstances that life hands us, you do not have a moral code, I'm pretty sure you at the very least spent 3-5 years in school. Remember school niggas? That place your parents sent you and you sat in a room with 24-30 other kids just like you? And there was an adult person in the front of that room? That person was called a teacher, and I'm sure he or she taught you what's right from what's wrong if your parents (or in this case, for the sake of this post, your mother) didn't. So the whole "I had it hard" excuse is totally irrelevant. I get upset with these things because I hate the idea of people thinking they can get away with shit because they didn't have a pops or because their family was poor. Oh, so that makes it okay for you to rob an old lady on the train on her way home from God know where? "I don't have a father, so you know what, I don't know that mugging someone's grandmother is wrong." Or "Hey, me and my family are poor, let me walk in this store with my gun that I somehow managed to buy with my household's very low level of income and rob and kill the man behind the counter who's only working to provide for himself and his family in a legal and honest way."

See what I'm saying? What does being poor or not having a father, or being raised in a rough neighborhood have to do with morality? You seriously don't see anything wrong with these things being used as excuses? I know a few people who grew up without their fathers, and almost everyone I know is poor (in the sense that I don't personally know anyone who is rich or has and has always had millions in their bank account) and none of these people have ever been involved in some sort of illagal activity. So please spare me the "product of my environment" mentality bullshit. Let's try to figure out what this is really about. What is the real reason for these crimes and these people's overly inappropriate behavior? Are we gonna blame the music for the billionth time? Because honestly I'm tired of hearing that one. Or are we gonna blame the streets, and the bad influences found on them? Nah, that one is old too. Why don't we blame it on the real reason... The REAL reason... The parenting or lack thereof. That's right, it's not the music's fault, music is just music, it's not your child's peers or the negative influences of the streets. It YOU! The bad mother or grandmother, or father or whoever the hell you are raising children in today's world. Call me what you want but I blame the parents before anything. Granted some kids are just born assholes and no matter what you do they will somehow end up bad apples, but for the most part I feel a parent is the cornerstone of a person's character.
If you never sat your child down, told him/her to shut up and listen, if you let that kid be out at all hours of the night with those creatures he/she called "friends" if you worried more about being a friend than a parent and were too weak to discipline him or her then guess what, at least half of the fault for your child robbing that bank is yours. You didn't have to be involved to be blamed. You see it all the time, these kids end up on "Scared Straight" kicking and screaming and behaving like wild animals and all they have as an excuse is "I don't know who my father is" Stop it!
I feel like I'm being redundant but all I'm saying is that the parenting has got to improve is we're gonna have any good people in the future. So you see why I agreed with my cousin when she said "Why bother teaching them?" Cause I obviously doubt it's the schools and teachers failing them. It's the parents. I know I've said it a million times but it's because I truly believe it. I wish I could be guilty of some stupidity and look my mom in the eye and say "Mom we're poor, that's why I did it."

I'm getting upset just talkin about it. So I guess on that note I'm done. Please folks, especially you rappers, stop using these bumass excuses to do your dirt. I'd respect you so much more if you said something like: "Yeah I did it for the rush, you know I'm a dickhead and I just wanted to do it for the hell of it." Than to blame your actions on anything or anyone else than yourself. I know sometimes there's cases where it's the right place at the wrong time, but unless this is your situation, stop the nonsense, you know why you got shit and I have no sympathy for you. Good Night.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

Club DJ Lifestyle (Independent Woman)

2011-10-20T10:16:00.000-07:00

What's going on Bull Penners? This one is a topic that I was saving for a video blog or an episode of "Bull for Mylez" but I been itchin to let it out for so long that I can't wait any longer. In fact, I'll probably still use it in a video blog but for now let me rock here. (Please be advised this is gonna be one of those topics that may pinch a nerve, if you're gonna be sensitive about it, close out this page NOW!)

This topic is about the "Independent Woman" in America.... Yeah, I got your attention now right? Lol, go have a seat and let this one sink in properly.
So I log on to Facebook (which for some strange reason has me "Subscribed" to half of my friends list, FB, please get ya shit together) and I come across a friends status update, rather, her update came across me. Among other things it read something along the lines of "We crush a man's ego everyday when we say "I don't need you" Hmmm.... I got the (Ed Lover "C'Mon Son") face on right now, so you know I'm serious here. Lol
Granted, I'm not sure what her inspiration for the post was, so I won't speak of her any longer, however I will speak about the North American "Independent Woman" as a whole. Now, it's 2011, if I had to put any money on this, I'd say that the "Independent Woman" came about somewhere around the year 2000. That's right, shortly after Beyonce and Destiny's Child released "Independent Woman" (the song) it became the anthem and the lifestyle choice for every woman, young lady, bird bitch, and or any other female in this country. A nigga couldn't compliment a woman on her shoes without her throwing it in his face that she bought them herself with her own hard earned money because she was Independent. Okay mama, I hear you, relax tho.
I hate to say it like this, but we live in a society, where music leads the masses. It's the reason many people dress the way they do, the reason why some fellas drive the cars they do and the reason why people order the bottle of liquor that they do at the club. In fact, it's the reason why people order bottles at the club at all. I feel like at one point it was okay to just buy individual drinks but if you don't have a waitress bringing sparkles to your table these days, I guess it means you ain't doing nuttin with your life. Pfst, Niggas I tell you. I hate to say it, but so many of you are sheep! Men and women alike. Don't front ladies, wether you choose to admit it or not, or wether you even realize it or not your life or many aspects of it is/are heavily based on something you copied from your favorite singer or celebrity. Oh, that's not true? How many of ya rockin a Cassie, Rihanna, or Amber Rose haircut right now? Stop It! You know damn well I'm giving it to you raw right now. However, I digress, we talkin about the Independent woman in particular.
So first Destiny's Child decided to release the record "Bills, Bill, Bills" in which these ~~bitc~~..... Excuse me, woman are asking the men if they are capable of supporting them. What was that for, every woman from the senior citizens down to the 4th grade girls was going around actin like a nigga wasn't good enough unless he had a Benz AND was able to pay for her VoiceStream Wireless phone bill! The fuck outta here! I wasn't old enough to hit the clubs yet, but I'm pretty sure this is when the "Buy me a drink" fiasco got outta hand with these ~~bitc~~.... Excuse me, woman! So at this point it would seem that the woman had a lil independence but they were pulling a Deebo from Friday and wanted to spend YOUR money! Lol, Comical shit if you ask me.
But whatever, that was 99... At the turn of the millennium it was all about "I can do this by myself, I don't need a man" and for the passed 11 years that's been the case!

And fellas, keep it real with me, the Club DJ's make situations worse. You can't party for an hour without the DJ droppin the beat and saying some shit like "Ladies, if you got a job and you got your own crib, and you know you paid for those shoes with your own damn money make some noise right now" at this point the ladies go ape shit throwing there hands up. So you would think that would be enough right? Wrong! Here come the DJ again "Ladies, if you know you don't need no man cause you drive your own car, and you pay your own bills and you taking care of your kids by yourself, make some Mother Fuckin noise right now" All the girl get on there "AaaaaaaaooowwW" shit, throw there hands up, slap there besties a Hi-5 and at this point they lookin at all the men in the room like they about to riot and revolt against us. So as men we thinkin aight he's done, he's about to get back to the music. But nope, wrong again, here comes the DJ AGAIN! "Ladies, if you don't need your baby father cause you know you got the Dildo in the top drawer and you can fuck yourself, never mind what he can provide for you and your kids MAKE SOME MOTHER FUCKIN NOISE RIGHT NOW!!" Drops mad bombs and shit, at this point the Ladies are dumb HYPE! And you standing there like "Well damn homie, who's team you playin for?" He goes back to playing a song and just like that, there is not a ~~bitc,~~ excuse me, woman who will even look at a man in the club, let alone dance with him..... What did I miss here? Lol, you standin there with your mans like "Ayo man, let's get outta here, the DJ must not have a penis and he just fucked the game up for those of us who do"

Ladies, hear me out here. Ya know I don't like to speak for anyone but myself, but I think I can safely speak for the fellas as a whole when I say this: We sincerely respect the fact that you are independent, nothing is more attractive than a shorty that can do for herself, hold herself down etc. etc. etc. But let's not go too far and act like you don't NEED a man. And when I say "need" I'm not saying you need a man to buy you a drink at the club, yeah we know, you got that. I don't mean you need a man to pay your phone bill, yeah we know, you got that. I don't mean you gonna die without a man, because we've seen ya, time and time again, raising your children alone, paying your rent, bills and car note alone. And we respect that truly we do. But all I'm sayin is stop frontin. You don't wanna die an old lady alone in her bed. A man naturally wants to do for his lady. A man wants to be able to provide for his lady. So a nigga steppin up and saying "Don't worry babe, I got this one" is not tryna clip your wing and stoppin you from flying, he's simply saying, "I'm doing this because I WANT to do it, or because you deserve it" xyz, this that and the third. Feel me? And I know ya sittin there thinkin this is an ego trip, It's not! I'm just being real, the same way men need women, women need men. If you being stubborn and you don't wanna agree just for the sake of being content in your own arrogance then by all means be my guest. But you know I'm right.
Especially if you so happen to be the one asking a nigga "Can you pay my bills" in '99 and six months later in 2000 it was all about you being Independent. Ladies, stop lettin Beyonce or any other singer/celebrity put the battery in your back. If you really as strong as you say you are, then be your own woman and set your own standards, don't wait to hear them coming through the speakers of your car while you drivin to work.
I hope I haven't been misunderstood. This is a topic that's been heavy on my chest for years now and I just had to get ot off.
So to you independent women out there, keep doing your thing mama, but don't be SO independent that you push every great prospect away thinkin "Oh nah, she don't need no love and affection, she has money and a great job....." Cause I'm sure that's not what you really want. I mean think about it, Even Beyonce has Hov. Lol! Imma leave ya with that one.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

Crossing the Bridge (Live Your Life)

2011-10-11T22:20:00.000-07:00

What's going on folks? It's been a while, hope ya all been livin well.
Honestly, I'm not even sure how I wanna start this one out, so I guess I'll just dive in. The other night I was speaking with a beautiful young lady and amongst other things the topic of tattoos came up... Don't worry I'm not gonna make this yet another blog post about tattoos, just bare with me. But we spoke about em and I told her I was gonna get one on my neck some time soon. The mother in her advised me to give it thought and I then explained that I give everything I do serious thought, not just tattoos, but every big decision I make is preceded by heavy thought and consideration. Honestly nothing less than 3 months passes by before I get a tattoo, or before I make a decision that could possibly change my life. However, the conversation reminded me of my homie Dirt who was against me stretching my ears.
As I remember it, Dirt asked me: "How are you gonna feel about that big ass hole in your ear when you turn 50? or 65? And honestly Dirt is not the first person to say something of that nature, I get it all the time from various people. "How are those gonna look when you get old?" "How do you know that what you feel right now is what you'll feel when you get married, have kids, start a family, yadda yadda yadda!"

I always tell those people the same thing: "I don't know" and it's not just that I don't know, but honestly, right now... I'd be lying to you if I said I cared. How will I like my tattoos when I'm 65? Hell, I'll probably still love em, but if I don't I'll know "When I was 24, I loved these tats." How will I think about my ears being stretched when I'm 45 or 50? Who knows, but I can tell you one thing I'm sure I may think something along the lines of "I'll never forget when I got these bad boys! Ooooowwweee, I thought they looked so good!"
You see where I'm going with this folks? I Eno Bull, am a man who lives for the NOW! I'm in no rush to leave this Earth, but I am not a foolish man, I know like (I hope) all of you know, that life is not promised. We don't know if we will be fortunate to see tomorrow. Only God knows wether or not this is my final blog post. Only God knows if I will ever see daylight again, because ONLY God knows what is to come in the future. So I live by a simple motto, "Do well, treat people right, and Live YOUR Life and Live for today!" People worry so much about tomorrow and they forget to live out today. People worry about tomorrow and for some people tomorrow never comes. I'm not trying to make this an issue of mortality or anything like that but I am trying to tell you that worrying so much about tomorrow kinda makes the sun shine a lil less today.
Like, remember in school, when we had that classmate that aced EVERY single test? They always had the right answer to every single question the teacher asked? To the point that the teacher not only never picked him or her to answer the question but the teacher also used his or her test as the grading guide for all the other test taken by all the students in the class.... That student never cut class, never took part in any of the class pranks or ever spoke outta turn. What do you think THAT person thinks when they look back on their lives at 65 or 70? What does that person tell their grandkids? "Oh no dear, I never really did anything worth mentioning, I was always in line and very well behaved" C'mon, who the hell wants to hear that life story. No one wants to hear "I didn't get tattoos because I didn't think I'd like how they would look now that my skin is droopy and hangs off my bones" I think everyone would much rather be the grandparent that tells their grand kids "I took my dads car for a joyride every weekend for 5 years straight and I even crashed it once, Boy was my dad upset" Lol. Or they wanna hear, "Well believe it or not I met your grandmother shortly after smoking a blunt with my best friend, she just so happened to be drunk herself from a bottle she snuck out of her parent's liquor cabinet!"
Lol. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying be a criminal or some sort of ruffian. But gees louise folks, we only live once, unless you practice Hinduism in which case you come back after death, but even then, the body you're in only lives once, so it works out for the sake of what I'm saying lol.

So what am I I saying here? Am I saying go break the law? No, of course not. Am I saying go indulge in drugs? No of course not. I'm not here to tell you how to live, and I am not here to preach, however I will, if I may, suggest that you remember to live a little. Life is very short, it's not promised at all, and at any given moment we could be taken up from this Earth. And even if we do make it to old or very old age, the point is you should live a life worth telling about.
Marijuana, despite all the truth commercials out to make it the next crack, is not that bad, try it once or 6 times.... Liquor, can maybe make you a lil sick, but it will not kill you (not if you're responsible) so go out and get drunk with your friends one time. Notice I said drunk, not pass out. Tattoos, they've been around for many thousands of years, and despite what anyone tells you it does not prevent you from completing any task that a person without tattoos can do. Will visible ones make things a lil harder for you? Yes, but that's because of society and their perception of them, not so much the tattoo itself. As for anything else, my stretched ears, your piercing, or anything else that may be "permanent" don't worry about how you'll feel about them tomorrow, enjoy em today. I'm not saying be like the grasshopper, but don't be the ant all your life either, because I sincerely feel that a full life of caution is not as great as one of a few experiments and mistakes. You can save up for a rainy day, as long as you don't forget to enjoy the downpour of light from today's sun.

I hope I've made myself clear. I'm not trying to corrupt anyone, but it'd be a shame to look back and think "Damn, I never cut class, I never smoked grass, and I never got to discover what teenage angst was all about." And this is of course not limited to teenagers, this is for everyone! Live life folks. Be responsible, but take a sick day from responsibility every now and then.

I never do this, but I'll end this with one of my favorite quotes:
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” -Mark Twain-

Stay Up, Go out and Live, and Stay Tuned Folks!

New York, New York pt. II

2011-09-30T12:53:00.000-07:00

What's going on folks? Episode 2 is here.
I realized that a few days had passed and I was starting to drift away from the desire to finish the post. So before I lose all interest in this topic allow me to finish up what i started.

So where were we? Ah yes, my thoughts on the fact that there is 2 different world within my city right? Well just like there is two different worlds within my city I have 2 different thoughts about it. I like it and I dislike it for several reasons.
Like:
I like it because it leaves my area a mystery to those who dwell in and visit the big city of dreams. When people visit they either hear from someone in the city or someone back home wherever they are from, that they shouldn't go to the Bronx, or to Brooklyn. It's like Manhattan is the Pride lands and all other places in New York are the forbidden shadowy area that one must never go to! (If you're not a Lion King fan, you may not get that last reference.) In other words, the Bronx, and Brooklyn and parts of Queens are just infested with drugs, crime, and it looks like some sort of battle ground from a movie. Or at least this is what people think.

Dislike
I strongly dislike this because, well damn.... How would you feel if the average person who lives outside of you're area thought you came from some sort of ghetto where you're best friend is a crack head and you have to run home from work and school everyday. Or tell me this people, how would you feel if someone (from your city nonetheless) asked you "Wait, isn't the sky brown over there?" < Believe me when I tell you I'm not making this up. A girl from Brooklyn, BROOKLYN, right across the bridge asked me that one time.... She literally with a straight face, asked me "Ain't the sky brown in the Bronx?" Wow shorty, you need to get out more. Another one from Queens came to visit me and said out loud "I did not know that there were houses in the Bronx" or what about Buddy's homie in Brooklyn one time who literally looked us both in the eyes and said "Bro, I can't go to the Bronx man, I don't have a gun and it's night time." Or our homie in Ohio who dead ass asked me "What's the life expectancy in the Bronx? Like 16 years old?" After I gave him a strange look he said "Nah, must be even younger than that right?" Damn B! Lol
You see where I'm going with this? It's this ignorance that my borough is a wasteland where only heathens and monsters live. Granted, I'm not gonna lie to you and say that there aren't areas that are bad.. Like Cam said "There's a war going on outside." Yes this has proven to be true, but this is EVERYWHERE..... Every state, every city has its tourist friendly spots and the areas where you don't wanna be caught in after dark.
Case in point whenever I go to Ohio (Columbus) I here that the West Side is less than friendly. In fact I wanted to go there (for reasons I will not share lol) and I was actually convinced that it wasn't a good idea. People from the East don't mess with people from the west in Columbus, Ohio, and vice-versa. So I'm here speaking to you on behalf of the Bronx and it's residents. The Bronx is indeed "The Hood" but when looked at through a different perspective it's freakin beautiful.... From the Grand Concourse down to Southern Blvd. To Morris Park back up to Fordham. From Cedar Park (The birthplace of Hip-Hop) back to Crotona Park. Tremont ave, Third Ave, University, the Projects, the Private Houses (That we DO have), the building and the shelters, My city is beautiful. You don't have to agree but that's what I'm tellin you. I'll vouch for the Bronx til I die because this is where I was born and raised and I turned out pretty damn good if I must say so myself.

So I guess what I'm saying is, the invisible barriers are there, and they are definitely felt, but It's not all that bad... Are there abandoned buildings here? Yes, are there crackheads? Yes in some areas, but that's not all we're about. There is a higher percentage of people here who are hard workers, business owners, talented artist, amazing thinkers and all around great people. So if you're visiting my city, don't be scared to get off the Tour Bus driving through Time Square hop on the 2, the 5, and 4 trains and come uptown for a lil bit. I promise you won't get shot. Come visit the Bronx Zoo, the Botanical Gardens, Shop at Bay Plaza or Fordham. Maybe catch a movie (even tho I watch movies downtown too Lol) Yes there is "Ghetto People" here, but to fully experience this city you have to take the good with the bad!

I guess those are my thought on the subject. In fact I've even considered writing a book about the Bronx, but I'll get back to you on that.
For now Enjoy these pics I took for ya.

I was Gonna let ya know which ones were taken in the BX and which were taken in Manhattan. But eff that, I feel the pics speak loud enough without telling you were they came from.

(Click Images to Enlarge)

So which New York are you? Which one do you want to get to know? The Jay-Z and Alicia Keys New York or the Cam'Ron and Jay-Z New York? Lol

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Take it Down!

2011-09-24T11:09:00.000-07:00

What's going on Bull Penners? By now I know you know that to me this is more than just a blog. This is my personal journal where I express and share all my experiences, my inner most thoughts (not really) lol and whatever else.

So this blog post is no different. This time I'm using it more so as a documentation. Remember the post "Losin It" like 2 years ago? Where I bought some dope ass expensive Rock & Republic jeans that fit about 2 sizes small? I told myself rather than return the pants I'll challenge myself to lose the weight to fit into the pants. Yeah that didn't work, I hung the pants outside my closet, I looked at pictures of the niggas in the catalogue and seen how dope it looked on them, etc. etc. etc. After about 3 days of "working out" I said "Fuck it" I'll give the jeans to someone who can fit em, cause by the time I can fit em shits will be all types of played out" Some will power huh?

However, believe it or not, I'm tired of living in the body I live in. Don't get me wrong, I'm confident enough to take my shirt off anywhere, as I'm sure you've noticed once or twice, but I just feel it's time to prepare myself for my mid 20's and there's no way I'm going into them with the same attitude and look as I've been rockin since I was 11.
Furthermore I feel this will help a great deal with the ladies! Not that I'm doing extremely bad in that department, but you know. Lol, say what you want, but women are just as shallow as I am. Yeah I may be cool and have a dope personality but if they aint attracted then you're doomed. You will be considered "Just a Friend" forever. Let's face it, unless you drop dead gorgeous, or filthy rich, the girls aint checkin for you, and I'm neither or. I know not one female who has "Fat" on her criteria list on top of all that. So seeing as how I was just recently shut down by the last girl who will ever shut me down, (the girl of my dreams-Remember Kryptonite) I figured, "maybe if you started workin out, lost some weight turned your body into something straight out of a surfer magazines, this wouldn't happen again" < I'm hard on myself, I know. But yeah.... I've decided that I'm gonna cut out the juice, avoid all fast and fried foods, I'm gonna stop eating passed midnight and I'm gonna start running again. It's gonna be painful cause anyone who knows me knows that juice is my crack, and 2:45am is my regular dinner time. And if you know me, you know I wouldn't run to save Keri Hilson from a burning building, Alicia Keys? Yeah, but Ms. Keri baby? Sorry love.... Lol. Never mind me and my jokes, it's late. But yeah, I refuse to be 25 with man boobs, plus I've wanted to get my ribs tattooed since I was like 19 and that just wouldn't look right with love handles. Basically, there's a lot I'm missing out on here by having this body, don't get me started on how annoying it is to shop considering fashion stops at a sz. 36 for men. So with all that said I guess it's time for a weigh in huh?

^Here it Is^

Live &in Living Color

No edits no nothin, this is all me.

^And this Here^

This is my first glass of water.

It's gonna be a loooooong winter.

So there you have it, I've given you yet another in depth tour of what's going on in my head! Now what other blogger do you know gives you realness like this? Not many if you ask me! Lolol.

The Diet starts today! Just water, no fried foods, no fast food, no eating passed midnight, oh boy... I can see the mood swings now! Pray for me folks!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

My Nigga! (Denzel Washington Voice)

2011-09-22T14:00:00.000-07:00

"What's going on my niggas?"

Lol, what's new Bull Penners....
Disclaimer: This, post may contain a little foul language so if you think you'd have a problem with that please see to it that you leave now. You've been warned, Thank You.

So the other day while on twitter I said something about someone or some people and used the word "nigga." Big whoop right? Ya've heard me say that word here, on facebook on twitter and in person a million times. However shortly after the tweet I received a mention saying something along the lines of "What did I tell you about the n-word, stop that shit..." from a good friend of mine, Angie (@Imani_Sublime) Lol, This is not the first time that she's expressed her anger and dislike/hate towards the word and of it's use... And honestly I respect her as a person, a friend and all that so I try my hardest not to use the word around her, but this is Twitter we talkin about, I tend to go off and not worry about what my followers may think of my tweeted thoughts.
Initially I brushed it off, but after some time passed I actually sat down and gave it some thought... I then tweeted that I would write up a post about it and so here it goes. First I thought to myself "I been using the word nigga for as long as I've been using all the other words in my "street vocabulary" folder." Since I was 9 years old the word nigga has been in use by myself right along with "shit, bitch, fuck, fag," and whatever other repulsive thing you can think of.... Do I use these words all day every day? No of course not, but amongst my peers? Oh, Mother Fuckin right. And just incase you wanna say "Well you must not have a big enough vocabulary..." C'mon, have you not read my words before? EVERYONE curses, or has used profanity at some point, don't sit there and lie like you're exempt from that category. So my question is: "Is the word "nigga" really as bad as all the others I just mentioned? Would you be less offended if I looked at your sister and said "Hey bitch, what's good?" Don't answer that.
I know that many people's reason for wanting to get rid of the word is it's origin. They say things like "That word was used to offend and oppress black people" and things like "that word is disgusting and offensive" "a word that signifies so much hatred and pain" as my homegirl Angie put it....

Alriiight! Here comes the assholes opinion. Imma tell ya like I told my homegirl, "a word, or words can, will and have always ONLY had the power that YOU give them!" I'm well aware that some of you still don't understand what I mean, or where I'm going with this. Check this out, if you CHOOSE to be offended, appalled, or otherwise effected by a word then I really don't know what to tell you. Different people say different things, especially considering that from generation to generation words take on different meanings.
Case in point: 'Artificial' used to mean: "full of artistic or technical skill’. Now its meaning has a very different slant. And even Nice, whose origin comes from latin meaning "to know" once meant: Ignorant or unaware.... Don't believe me? Do your research like I did.

Angie told me to: "Look up the etymology of the word "nigger"...it's rooted from "Negro" which is in essence rooted from "Necro"... Which in Latin means death or to be dead. When the word "Negro" was used, it ewas meant to signify that Africans were dead because according to Christian faith they were soulless as they did not practice Christianity. So, basically to continue to call someone "nigga" or "niggaz" is furthering this concept that brown people have no soul... And we are living up to those standards. Again, true enslavement is when we accept their ideas on us as truth." Very well written and heart felt if I say so myself. But If I were to ask 5 people on twitter or Facebook or people at my corner store who use the word what it meant TO THEM, this would be the furthest thing from what they thought. Blame their blissful ignorance if you will, but that's just how it is. So I'm well aware of the other people who feel "Well people were disrespected by that word and it was used to keep black people down xyz" Okay, coo I understand that at some point the word wasn't a term of endearment as it's become these days, but which one of those people read my tweets? How many of them are my peers? Which one of those people who were once oppressed and kept down with the power of that word in the car with me when I say "You missed the exit my nigga!?" How many of them are listening to "Watch the Throne" with me while I'm in the house or on the bus etc. etc. And please don't misunderstand what I'm saying, I'm not trying to blame the music I listen to, nor am I trying to blame my actions or in this case my words on my environment, but at the end of the day it's all around me. By now, for me, using the word "Nigga" is like my accent. I can't control how I sound. I am indeed a product of my environment and I feel I'm a pretty nice guy if I say so myself. Granted, please don't mistake me for a disrespectful dude, I tend to watch my mouth around people I interact with and don't know well. I would hate for someone's first impression of me to be "The young man who couldn't stop cursing and using the N-Word," cause even I would hate to meet someone like that. However amongst my peers, in my comfort zone, on twitter (where the whole point is to talk your smack)I don't feel that I have to change how I speak. Especially to put anyone else at ease. So you telling me "Stop saying the N-Word" is like shoving your religion down my throat, and by now I think we all know how I feel about that! Some people say "dude" others say "pal" or "buddy" I say "nigga." Does this mean that I feel you should use it? Does this mean I'm telling you join me in my usage of the word? No not at all, it simply means that this is what I say, and I don't feel it's a bad word, however if you do...... Well, that's your issue. And I say it with all due respect.

But I will propose a challenge to those of you who would rather I didn't use it. Contact me in private (EnoBull@gmail.com) tell me "Eno I feel you should stop using the N-Word," and I will give you a chance to try and get me to stop using it. You'll see how when you hit me up.

For now
Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

P.S. If you, out of spite or ignorance hit my homegirl up on twitter, just to bomb her @ mentions with the N-Word, you and I will have severe problems. This post was not intended to start a war but to find some sort of common ground. You've been warned. So know that if you start following her and she follows back, you should tred lightly around her and have the respect you have for me for her as well. You've been warned.

New York, New York

2011-09-15T01:13:00.000-07:00

(You may wanna Google lyrics or open up Youtube to read along with this one)

There's a few reasons why we say "New York" twice when we're referring to our city... The most obvious of course being the fact that New York is the name of a city in a state of the same name, but also because within this large city there is two different worlds, two different New Yorks. Are you drawn in yet? Have a seat let me explain myself.

For as long as I could remember, or at least since I learned there was a world outside of my beloved city, I've been very well aware that there have been two worlds within my city. In recent years there have been several songs dedicated to the Big Apple. Of course we know Mr. Frank Sinatra's classic and Ja-Rule, Fat Joe and Jadakiss got together to make a dope track dedicated to the big city as well. But two songs of them all have stood out to me and have all but put a literal and physical face to this fact. Both with Jay-Z. One alongside Cam'Ron and the other featuring Alicia Keys.
_________________________

"Welcome to New York City"
Artist: Cam'Ron ft. Jay-Z & Juelz Santana
Album: Come Home with Me
Year of release: 2002

This one is talking about the city outside of the city (Downtown Manhattan. It relates more to Harlem and the outer boroughs) This song discusses the drug game, the loitering in project building hallways. Carrying guns, wars going on outside one's window.
Jay-Z says certain lines such as "Rucker Game Attender" "Niggas will drive by in the day, murder you in the dark" "Wet niggas up like the Johnny pump is open, Nigga I play hard!"

Then there's some of Cam'Ron's lines: "There's a war going on outside no man is safe from/it don't matter if you 3ft. or 8'1," "Carry 8 guns/2 in the trunk/2 on the waist/2 on the ankles/2 to just spank you" "It's La Cosa Nostra..." "...They'll toast your go-for, bread loaf your chauffeur"

"Rich black thugs"

You see, its the lifestyle inspired by famous mafia movies. The ambition of becoming rich fast so they deal drugs. It's a news report of war going on in the very streets that these reporters live in. It's a story of a day spent outdoors, from a basketball game at Rucker Park (Very Famous park in Harlem where the greatest street ballers and even some entertainers and professional athletes come to play basketball) to giving you a warning of what may happen. The Johnny Pump (fire hydrant) being open, which is a very strong visual of NYC in the summer. But it's also a story of brief success "Mink on a motorcycle, trinkets they're so delightful, blinging there's so much ice, (Bling!)" This is the New York that the tourist never sees. The New York that lies beneath the surface of the clean Empire State that you see on post cards.

_________________________

"Empire State of Mind"

Artist: Jay-Z ft. Alicia Keys

Album: Blueprint 3

Year of Release: 2009

This song is discussing the glamourous New York (Manhattan) Madison Square Gardens, no longer at the Rucker. Dreams coming true, Big Lights, High Fashion, Yellow cabs etc.

Jay-Z is quoted saying: "Now I'm down in Tribeca, right Next to DeNiro" "Sitting court side, Knicks and Nets give me Hi-5" "I made a Yankee hat more famous than a Yankee Can" "Statue of Liberty, Long live the World Trade" "I'm from the Empire State that's..." "Caught up in "the "In" Crowd, now you in style"

Alicia's Hook: "In New York, Concrete jungle where dreams are made of, there's nothing you can't do, Now you're in New York, these streets will make you feel Brand New, Big lights will inspire you, let's hear it for New York"

"One hand in the air for the big city, srteet lights, big dreams all lookin pretty, no place in the world that can compare, put your lighters in the air everybody say yeaaaahhhhh"

So triumphant isn't it? But do you see the vast difference between the two. One tells you that the streets of the city will make you feel brand new, the other suggests that if you're wearing anything brand new you may be at risk of getting shot over it in a mugging. "Remember the war going on outside?" That's what that's about.

_________________________

So if you haven't figured it out, there's the "I can be whoever I want to be, I too can have a beautiful Tribeca apartment next door to my favorite celebrity" New York and then there's the "You may wanna be careful walking down the street because there is a war going on outside and this guy has a few guns on him, ready to test you all in the name of his respect" New York.

There's the "I have to hustle to get what I want, because no one is gonna hand it to me" New York and there's the "I'm famous, so professional athletes give me their hand in respect" New York.

So what are Eno thoughts on this subject? We'll see. Part II coming soon! I may even have a treat for you. But for now I think I wanna end this like an episode of Sopranos and.......

Stay Up, And Stay Tuned!

My Baby is 3 Years Old

2011-09-11T17:35:00.000-07:00

Yooooo. I bet ya didn't even realize that last month was tha Bull Pen's anniversary did ya? Lol, It's all good. I didn't promote so I understand. But yeah, 10 days after my 21st birthday I put up "My First Post" lol... It's only a short 3 year later, but damn it feel like it went by too quick. Like I just started this. I feel I've grown before you, I feel like I've become a writer on the internet. However, instead of boring ya with my own words for a few paragraphs, this year I had a different idea. Rather than post pictures from the year, and rather than write out some boring "Anniversary Post" I wanted to put the blog in the readers hands for once. What do you mean? I mean I asked my readers, the ones who've been rocking with me since Aug. of 08, the ones who just started rocking with me, the ones who have rocked with me once or twice to write a testimony. I thought it be fun for the readers to see more than just one perspective for once. Feel me? It's almost a month late, but when you read all the things that all your fellow readers wrote, I think you'll find that the wait was well worth it. So with all that said, let's get started:
______________________________

Jemeka:
Eno Bull, if I ever created a list of my top 5 favorite writers, you'd be on it. I've told you before that you're really talented. Understatement maybe. I think it's awesome that you're so transparent and REAL when you write. It's inspiring, really. Visiting Tha Bull Pen is always an experience. Your posts evoke so many emotions. Your readers feel what you feel! "My First Love", "Untitled pt 1" and "A Song" are just a FEW of my favorites. Just keep doing what you're doing alright?

Reese:
"What you mean you ain't got no malt liquor for the homies? Are you trying to get shot?" -The doctor that delivered Emilio Lorenzo Cortez Gutierrez.

That's how awesome having a friend like Eno is. It makes you say cool intellectual shit you wouldn't normally say. I mean like, his blog is all like, funny and stuff, but mostly it's colorful and it has great photographs on it. He also told me to say that I learned something from his blog, or he'd kidnap my cat..so here goes:
I learned that Eno is a very good typist, he takes amazing photographs, and he likes to tell stories that help you get to know him better as a person. His entries just flow from the heart, it never feels like he's writing just to write, or blogging to get some fame. I know this cool dude offline..and he's everything his blog makes you think he is: tall, intelligent, and brown.
Congrats on the anniversary, and thanks for blogging and being an awesome friend homeboy.
You owe me like fiddy bucks. Love, Reese.

ps. Can I have my cat back now?

Nitza:
Apparently, we all have something to share. No, honestly - ask me to name people that have blogs and I can rattle 6 names of the top of my head: Sandy with travel, James with music, Ashley with her dating life, John on the art scene, Lynn on the Brooklyn life, and Lydia with whatever the week brings. In a word, exhausting. Now, having a blog site doesn't necessarily mean that your viewpoint is interesting, different, or relevant. A lot of these blogs are actually pretty dull, I don't mince words so I will label them all as "Generic" - Yeah, I said it. Around 1 year ago, I noticed that I kept returning to read Eno Bull's blog, Tha Bull Pen. Took me by surprise since I admit that I'm tired of blogs! But I realized that Eno's viewpoint, though different from my own, was actually quite interesting; he could be controversial, yet honest, loud, but sweet, a gentleman with a foul mouth. I found myself agreeing with Eno and wishing to give him a high five, then I wanted to punch him. Hey, I'm just being honest. Overall, the kid does a good job. He's my cousin after all and I wouldn't expect anything less. Love him (picture me with a grin in my face).

Dos:
Ode to my Eno LL … What can I say about tha homie Eno?! Aside from being my brutha from anutha mutha … aside from being a photographer and videographer extraordinaire … aside from being so handsome… so cool … so GQ … … he has impressed me with his ability to express himself, his thoughts, and his ideas through his blog, Tha Bull Pen. Eno never fails to keep me entertained with his ideas, rants, and opinions … which all end up being very thought provoking, no matter the topic! I loved the blog so much … I harassed Eno to take Tha Bull Pen to the video blog world … Being the character that he is, I knew that the visual would definitely compliment the voice, the thoughts, and the ideas of Tha Bull! With that said … ALL LOVE to Eno and congrats to the 3 year anniversary of Tha Bull Pen! Wish you the most success!!! #DoWork!! #Salute!!! ~Dosage!!~

Ty:
His words, his wisdom, his individuality.....

Eno Bull's blog "Tha Bull Pen" is celebrating it's third anniversary and it is surely something to celebrate. Eno has blessed his readers with his thoughts which are innovative, true and invigorating. Eno is young but, unlike many in his age group, he is very gifted with the talent of written words from clear, educated thoughts. His blogs suck you in, makes you think, and leaves you satisfied with HIS knowledge. Every entry is unique and is an ode to his big heart and humble being. He is extremely family oriented and you can feel the love he has for his family through his words he shares with all of us. May Eno give his readers another year full of thought provoking, great reads.

Happy Anniversary to Tha Bull Pen!
Love you Eno!
Lady Ty

Angel:
I have never been a fan of blogs or bloggers, mainly because quite honestly I dont really care what others opinions are about things. I feel like I feel and, especially being a taurus, I am stubborn and am usually set in my ways & opinions! With that being said, after the 1st time reading "Tha Bull Pen"...I was a fan and hooked! Eno's blog was different to me for this reason...he didnt care either. It wasnt simply a blog of "this is the hottest movie out but I don't like it because...." , it was more real life wow these are things that meant enough to take MY time "I EXPERIENCED this situation today and I felt like this, I UNDERSTAND ya'll might not feel the same but YOU wast there. So feel how you want but Ima be me" I guess what Im saying is he is REAL! He isnt a blogger just worried about the number of posts he has or about riding the fence to make his readers happy....he's Eno...& he is definitely an example of Quality in a world of Quantity!

Michelle:
Here's the thing, I've never met a person of the male species that I feel is my exact counterpart. Reading THA BULL PEN is always an adventure, reading about secret loves, bitches that aint putting out (frontin). To being pulled intensely into something that Eno is engaged in from his love of photography to his obsession with music (good shit that it is) So on your anniversary i want to say i Laughed, learned and loved through your words, Ive been pissed off at your opinions and at the same time respected and agreed. Ive appreciated how your able to speak from a womans point of view as well as give the males BRUTALLY honest (niggaz dont do that) view. Ive appreciated how youve let myself as well your other dedicated readers into your world, into your head, damn near into your heart; and with that I want to say Happy Annivarsary ill be forever a fan. (when are you going to take my picture? "immortalize my shit")

Roxanna:
A modern day voice. Unmoved by criticism, hate, class, race or gender. Opinion is opinion. Like it or love it. I started reading these blogs since its birth and have watched it grow and take on a life of its own. Great writing will always find a way to make you question, understand and appreciate – although you may not agree with the discussions, and most certainly have your own opinion on the matter(s), one thing is always for certain Eno will state his case, present evidence and having you nodding in agreement before you reach the final period. The words spoken are “As Is” – so to speak. They are raw, they are lived and they are true. Anyone growing up in the hood can relate. We are all products of our environment and Eno simply puts life to paper in a way that is unmatched. Reading his blog is like having a conversation with him – right down to the expressions and tone. I love it! There is true talent behind these words and I ask everyone to take heed and watch these blogs because they will most certainly become something great. Eno does not write to make friends and that is what makes this a great blog. Keep up the good work baby brother!

Ieisha:
I have said this time and time again, but again Eno is an exceptional writer, one would deem his writings poetic. His blogs give us, the readers a chance to truly experience "How Eno's mind truly works." His blogs express emotions and feelings that we are often embarrassed to express to the world. One blog in particular I truly loved (I love them all) was the Fathers's day blog... That blog was probably one of the realest, most emotional words I have ever read. It showed the world a different side to Eno.... His bravery in putting those words on paper helped me to put in prospective my life in terms of my relationship with my own father. I walked away in awe and tears as it made me realize that sometimes having no father is better than having a father who is emotionless and unsupportive (I'm referring to my dad) that blog amongst many others were my guide to implementing not only a new way of life but it forced me to be real with myself about situations and feelings I tried to suppress!! Overall, I don't think there are words that I can express to give Eno the props he truly deserves! Your an awesome, real, controversial writer and your writing should be on the Times best seller list. Keep up the good work!

Dwayne:
As long as I've known Eno he's always been two things an asshole & a person with an opinion lol. But when he started his blog he found a way to combine both....and he did it in a brilliant way. I'm not just sayin this because he's my brother,but as a fan of social commentary, I've watched Tha Bull Pen go from a tongue in cheek rant to a clever well crafted gaze into the mind of a rebel. I've also had the privilege of being featured numerous times on the blog & hope I can be featured again in the future. So to my brother Eno Effn Bull & Tha Bull Pen I say.....Man Fuck ya blog, Add My BBM!!-Deascent

Buddy:
3 Years strong for tha Bull Pen!! An outlet much needed and so efficiently utilized by the man behind the posts , Eno mutha effin BULL!! From controversy to emotion-filled bloggin, uv kept me n the masses entertained bruh. Ya blog ain't a colorin book like most of these utha joints dat r heavily saturated wit pix, u capture the essence of expression thru literature, very eloquently. Keep doin it lil bro, much love, and u always have my support!

Che:
In the Nas and Damien Marley Distant Relatives album, on a song entitled “Friends”, Damien Marley says,

“Yes We Surely Had A Blast / We're Like Family / Me & You / A Nuh Every Path You Cross / Lead To Somebody Whe True / Of The Many That Are Called Only Chosen Is A Few”

That Practically explains my friendship with Edwin Gutierrez, known to others simply as Eno.

When I first met Eno, through Pers, and Buddy, he was quiet but very absorbent and observant, articulate in his own right, and only spoke when spoken to. These are my accounts, so he could disagree – but my memory is quite vivid. Eno was always down for a good laugh, and that is all that we did when the crew from Davidson Ave, gathered on the block or in an apartment.

It was the environment in which we grew up in that provided us with the creativity, experiences, and vocabulary that led us to make what we called “Music.” It was actually just rhetorical frustration on top of instruments that caught the ears of people that shared those same feelings, people like Edwin. Eno had the capability to interpret any bar that was spat from any section 8 / 4’ Treign / BXL member, in which I consider to be a skill, since I thought I was overly clever with words. It was this passion of his that allowed him to blend in with the crew.

When we began to perform at venues, Eno was there with a camera/video camera documenting everything moving. I can now look back and realize how important those times were to our development, and furthermore, how important the documentation was in itself. Eno took this craft and expanded, as any smart person would do with a talent that he or she is good at.

However, Eno has to accredit a lot of his maturity and growth to his large-supporting family: a large group of down-to-earth brown-skin people from Honduras, that consist of beautiful, fierce, loving females and talented, humorous, educated males. I consider myself - an African, from Ghana- extended family of theirs. And they have been nothing less than accepting of me and others alike. Therefore, as the junior, Edwin was somewhat forced to bare some of those traits to that of his immediate family – the gift.

The gift that was bestowed on this kid is one that he carried unconsciously through his actions and speech. If we as a circle didn’t curse, neither would he. If we didn’t go around bullying kids, neither would he. But had we pushed over a Street Fighter arcade machine for a thrill, he probably would have to, and eventually got caught trying to run because he was heavier than the rest of us, lol. But the point is, Edwin is a mold of positive influences, with his own twist.

Now, just like any individual who becomes educated, you beginn to make your own observations and draw your own conclusions to certain theories, and practices. Fredrick Douglas – after teaching himself how to read while in captivity – began to stumble across documents that revealed detailed information about the slave trade, and memoirs of his masters. In that instant, Douglas wished that he had never learned how to read to begin with. This is parallel to the complex that has now become of Edwin – a new “think for yourself” characteristic – which is extremely critical in this day and age, hence the beginning lines of this testimony, “Only Chosen Are A Few” Yes, it does deviate from the status quo, and so does he, but why should we all be alike? As long as you stay true to you, and have a positive purpose in life…then…live your life. But then we must ask ourselves, “What do we mean by the word ‘positive’?” I’ll leave that to the reader.

I envision great things for Edwin. Through his creativity, his options are endless. Take his blog for instance, and how far and popular it has become. He doesn’t ramble about how ‘fly he is’, or much he’s “balling” because that is not his purpose in life nor in his writing. Rather, his discussions vary from a wide range of topics from religion, and homophobia, to vanity and poverty. That makes for a good read. I personally enjoyed the “2011 Is Home” blog, which speaks about the small reunion that we as friends try to have once a year around January to make sure everyone is in perfect health and living right. I look forward to more of those. It allows us to reflect – through music, food, drinks, laughter, gaming and cutting, lol - how far we have come as simply FRIENDS. And you cannot put a corner store price tag on that. And it was Edwin who documented that event, which allows me reflect upon it, and laugh again – the literary double entendre. You can now return to the top and re-read the Damien Marley lyrics. - Che
___________________

Honestly, I know it comes off as if I'm just saying this, but I literally read each and every one of these testimonies word for word. Before I copied and pasted I took the time out to read and understand what each and every one of you wrote, the same way ya take the time to read whatever it is I write. Some of ya brought me very close to tears and I swear ya all made me feel loved. I can't begin to express how much I appreciate all your words. I say it all the time that when I started this blog it was simply a journal for me. Well it's obvious that I've read the words of my journal out loud so much that it's brought me an audience of great people. I promise to continue to give ya the quality blogs that you've come to love. And I'll continue to thank the man above for blessing me with such great family like all of you. Peace Ya'll Eno Loves you all!
Happy 3rd Birthday to my blog!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

P.S.
I didn't plan it this way, but it just so happens that this blog fell on 9/11. With that said I want to take the time out to pay my respects to all those fallen on that horrifying day 10 years ago.
R.I.P to all those victims and my sincerest condolences to the families who lost loved ones.

Romance & Rebellion (Hurricane Irene Night 1)

2011-08-27T17:51:00.000-07:00

Yooooo, what's going on folks? So for those of ya who don't know, the East coast is supposed to be gettin hit with a hurricane tonight (Saturday @ midnight) and I don't know how long it's supposed to last. Me personally, I'm convinced this is just another Y2K, remember that? I mean they even shut down the MTA (Metropolitan Transit Authority) for my non new York readers, or those of ya who didn't know what it stood for. Granted, it's better to be safe than sorry, but if you ask me this is some sort of government cover-up to something big. Like maybe some aliens are coming down to get settled under ground in Connecticut and there needs to be a distraction, but that's neither here nor there.... Lemme shut my mouth before I end up missing. Lol

^Look at Grand Central Station^

In my whole 24 years of living in NYC I've never

seen the MTA shut down like this. Crazy!

Needless to say I'm home, bored out of my skull. It's been raining all day and with this so called "Hurricane on it's way, the city has been shut down. I been sitting here watchin TV and thinking about my usual all day. I gotta be real with you, I wanna go to this girl crib and get some mean wops. But considering that the cabs and or busses or trains aint workin, and there's NO way in hell I'm walkin over there, I don't see that happening! Lol.

Anyway I got an Eno Bull News Update for ya:
I've decided (about a week or two ago) that I am gonna start growing out my beard til January.

^Day 1^

Full Story Here:

However this blog post is about something I heard while I was watching TV (if you can consider it watching, it was more like listening while surfing the web.) But while a show about Hot Rods was playing, I heard a dude say "This car is all Romance and Rebellion" or something to that effect. And it was just one of those things that catches your ear and sticks with you. Like it was meant for me to hear it. Why you ask? Because those two words together are what make me. I am the marriage of Romance and Rebellion. I mean think about it, sometimes a hopeless romantic and always a rebel. I swear when I heard it, it was poetry to me. I swear I feel it's almost Tattoo worthy, but I may not go that far. But I do know I want to use it as a title for something. Maybe a future project, or maybe the words will just rest in the background of my thoughts til they serve some sort of purpose for me. But I just wanted to share that with ya. It won't be the last time ya hear those words from me "Romance and Rebellion!"

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

And please be safe, Avoid going out if you don't have to and be with your families!

The OG

2011-08-20T02:00:00.000-07:00

This post has little to do with anything. I literally felt the need to post some pictures of me and my grandmother on the internet, and so what better place to showcase em than on 'Tha Bull Pen?'

I went to grandma's Nursing home today and figured I'd bring Candace along because I can't remember the last time grandma and I took a picture together.
Obviously (you should) know that I have more love for this woman than words can even begin to explain, and I feel that we have an amazing relationship. Even tho she is sincerely convinced that the arms attached to my bod y belong to someone else (cause she refuses to believe I would get tattoos on purpose) and she feels that my pants should be worn higher! Yeah Right lady! Dream on! Lol, But that's my heart. God knows I appreciate everyday he gives me with her in my life.

^I swear this is the only person that can make^

me smile my actual smile!

^Us 24 years ago^

Bonus

^Found this while looking for another pic of^

OG and me in the archives....

Rudy Had to be a year old so I had to be about 5.

^Thanksgiving 2010^

I believe.... But def TG, I remember my sweater.

Freakin love this kid!

^Look at Grandma's house wear tho!^

There's not a grandma in the world with more swag than mine!

In conclusion, I Effin love my grandma and she has more swag than yours! That is all! Lol

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Post no. 207 (Post Birthday Re-Cap)

2011-08-16T09:28:00.000-07:00

Allllrrright! So, What's going on Bull Penners?
You're favorite blogger has been 24 for about 46 hours or so now. How'd it go. Lol I gotchu. Pull up a seat.

Saturday night:
August 13th, 10:45pm
Mylez had been promoting for a party at Honey Lounge so that's where it was for the night. There was a BBQ going on in my back yard, but I was not in attendance. I was in my room sleeping in a planking position lol. Trying to get some rest before showtime. When I woke up I made it my business to go to the back and get a plate of "Imma drink heavy tonight so let me get some food" food. I came back upstairs, took Juno for a walk and hit the shower shortly after. I had my outfit ironed and laid out on my bed since around 5:30 (Could you tell I was excited? Lol) and I NEVER Iron clothes, yeah I know, call me what you want, my shit be clean lol. Anyway, 11:20 came around and I put on my fly ass threads and walked up to Mylez crib. We chilled for a minute while we waited for our ride. 12:00 came through and already the texts and calls were comin in.... Damn I'm loved. Buddy forgot his watch at my crib so we came back down the block, where my mom, uncle, brother and cousin sang "Happy Birthday" to me. Lol. So Penny showed up and we got in the car, went to go get Eish and headed downtown.

A lil more than half way there it began to pour like nobody's business... I'm talkin movie rain, But it literally rains on my birthday EVERY year. By now I've learned to embrace it. Plus that aint stop nobody. We got downtown and met up with the team, but not before we dealt with the gayest faggot security/bouncer nigga I've ever encountered. Lol I wish I had gotten his name so I can put his ass on blast, but whatever, we not tryna kill the happy mood right?
I walked in and met Perse, Sue, H, Jayo, and his lady. Shit was real live. H treated me to a cup of my favorite: Patron and Red Bull.. MMMMMMMMmmm! lolol. Shortyl after Chris showed up with Kay, Jasmine and Jason, How real was that I really appreciated them showin up.
Chris proceeded to buy me about 3 cups of Patron and Red Bull and Buddy bought me about 2. Lol Have you lost track of the amount of drinks? Lol You do the math. So the party went on I danced with this mystery faced chick with thee softest ass! Lolol. I think it was about 2:45-3:00 when Khaya showed up. So the party was poppin, I enjoyed myself and the night came to an end....

^First Shot (Picture and drink)^

of the night.

This Patron however is not recommended.

^I pulled off^

red denim very well

If I say so Myself!

^Now, What's my Name?^

^You are now in the presence of some^

smooth Criminals!

Sunday:
August 14th, 11:34
I'm waking up real early these days.... I woke up to the sound of heavy rain hitting my air conditioner, and a gloomy grey light carefully creeping through the curtains. I thought to myself: "The Rain doesn't change the fact that it's my birthday. God blessed me with this day and I'm gonna enjoy it rain and all!" Thank You Lord!
So I chilled around my room for a while til I logged on to 'All the Parties' to see how many pictures I ended up in last night. I saw em laughed and got up to get my day started. Buddy hit me up and told me that he was going to the lab later on that night, so I figured I'd go too. Like I said the rain aint stoppin nobody, imma go chill with my niggas. So Mylez showed up, me and Rudy got in the car and were on our way.
When we got to Perse crib everything seemed normal, I walked to the top of the steps and tried to get into the studio. Opened the door..... and...... SURPRISE! Ya should have seen the look on my face. LOL! I swear I should kick myself for not seeing it. But these people get me EVERY year! I'm not playin they did the same thing last year at the same place lolol. But I loved it and I was sincerely surprised. I was more surprised at how they planned it last minute, but it worked out real well.

Reg and Stace came through, Perse and Sue of course, H swung by, Che came through, Penny of course and a second surprise also showed up. I know what you thinkin: "Oh shit! they got you a stripper?!" Lol, nah, no naked bitches for me (At least not there) lol, my cuz Kessler who is in town from Miami came through and with a bottle of Gold Patron! Wow! Lol ya kknow I'm a lil borderline alchy so that just topped the night of so well! We all had shots and cracked jokes for the rest of the night. Came home and had a great "Brother's talkin" convo with my lil bros.

^Love the Sign in the lab^

^I don't know who took this pic^

but I like it.

^No caption needed!^

But doesn't this remind you of this?

All in all I got everything I wanted for my birthday! My Family!
To all of you who came out to celebrate it with me, to all those who planned it and to basically all of ya, thanks a Mil man! I Love ya and appreciate ya more than I can explain.

To my mom, my uncle Elvis, Samantha, Ieisha, Buddy, Perse, Sue, Jayo, H, Penny, Chris, Kay, Jasmine, Jason, Khaya, Rudy, Keith, Che, Kess, Reg, Stace, D who came through today to kick it with me, even Momo and Jordae, this weekend was poppin yo! And I have ya to thank for it. I can't say "thank you" enough man! And I know there's only much better to come for all of us! See ya in Vegas next year! AAAOOOWWW!!!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Thirsts & Curves

2011-08-15T17:51:00.001-07:00

So D came up with a series of Thirst bucket moves and Curves to break down the different people who suffer from and or dish em out.
We Ustreamed for an hour and change. It's something we plan on doing a lil more often so check out the second episode and come back next time.

(^Hope you got an hour to spare lol)

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Birthday's Eve

2011-08-13T12:32:00.000-07:00

YOOOOOOO!
What's going on ya? It's that time of the year again! My birthday is here.... Or at least it will be here tomorrow, or tonight at midnight depending on which kind of clocker you are. Lol, either way we are on the eve of my 24th birthday and I just wanna take this time out to give thanks for so many things, cause Lord knows tonight I will be intoxicated and it's possible that tomorrow I will still be intoxicated. So let's just get this out the way now.

God
(The big guy upstairs)
I wanna thank God for continuing to bless me with life each morning thus far. He and I both know that it's not promised and that at any given moment I can breath my last breath. I know that he's disappointed in me every time I have an unproductive day, but he also knows I'm workin on it, right Big Homie? Lol, Thank You Lord!

Mom
(My Main Lady)
Words couldn't possibly begin to explain how much I love my moms yo! For real, we may have a few disagreements and sometimes I KNOW I piss her off, she tends to get on my left from time to time but that doesn't take away our love for each other. And although I tell her every day that God gives me life, I love her. And if it wasn't for her and my father I wouldn't be here today, typing these words for ya to read! So this one is for the My main Lady. I Love you Ma!

Family
(My support system)
There's really not much I can say about em that I haven't already said a million times. I love em to death b! Literally. Good, Bad, Bad hair days, Ugly sweaters and all... Lmao! I'm playin ya'll I love ya Sweaters. Lol, But to all my cousins, my aunts, uncles, grand parents, friends of the fam that I was told to call Aunt and Uncle as a kid, I love ya, and I continue to be grateful for being born into this clan. I wouldn't change eith of ya for the world!

The Fellas
(Rep yo Set!) No particular order at all.
Rudy - My lil brother... I feel the older you get the closer we become. I want you to know that I truly regret every moment I ditched you and left you behind when we were younger. I don't ever want you to think it's cause I didn't like/love you man. I was just being a dickhead for reasons that I will probably never understand. Watching you become a young man and sorta feel like I had little to do with it bothers me, but because of that I'm gonna work double hard to make up for it, and from here on out you know your spot is reserved right next to me meng! I love you man, and not a day goes by that I don't thank God for giving me the coolest Lil Brother in the world!

Mylez - Mom never had children before me B, so God saw it fit to put you here. There's no words homie. You got my back like no other person ever has. We a regular Ren and Stimpy like Eish calls us! (Shout outs to you too Eish, I love you big Sis) Bull for Mylez til the casket drops man. I appreciate everything you do, everything you tell me and all the lessons you teach me, even when you don't realize that you teaching, I'm learning and I hope you know that. Thanks for bein my big brother man, I know it's a headache most of the times, but I know you don't give up on me and for that I appreciate you ore than words will ever tell.

Keith - My new Big ass Lil brother lol. (For those of ya who may or may not know, Keith is Rudy's best friend and he's been around for long enough to make my list) What's it been now bruh? A year or so... I got soo much love for you man that blood couldn't make us any closer. You've become a part of my family and regardless of anything that will never change. As I'm sure I've proven to you once or twice, I got your back and I love you lil bro. And don't be embarrassed when I call you lil bro, lol I say it with a tremendous amount of love.

Perse - Cuzzo, the comedian... (Lol, nah, I really do think you funny b, I just don't be wantin to give you the satisfaction of lettin you know you made me laugh! lolol) But honestly cuz, I just appreciate everything you do meng. You are a walking, talking ball of creativity and talent. If I never told you, or if you've forgotten I've always been inspired by you to do and be better. I look up yo you and I feel blessed to have such a person like you on my team. Nothin we can't do as a team bruh!

Dirt - Damn bruh... I'm turning 24 tomorrow... and I've known you since I was 6. You see how old we are man? Lol, but I only mention that to show that when we say "Family" that's exactly what we mean. We came up together and I've always considered you to be something more than just a friend. You my brother, no different than any other nigga on this list. No matter what happens, no matter what we go through we gonna always be family. I appreciate your presence in my life cuzzo. And you BETTER be at my Party tonight Muh Fuckah! Lol.

Reg - Ahhh man, this nigga here... The hardest working man in Show Business... Reg what's good homie. I don't ever tell you, cause you a wild boy, but I respect you with all my heart brother. I got nothin but love for you. Stace hit the buzzer beater when she brought you home and introduced you/brought you into the family (Shout outs to you Stace) lol. But for real bruh I love you man and you deserve all the greatness that is coming your way. We bout to quit these "Regular Nigga" Jobs and we gonna be RICH! Lol.

Che - Che, you ever seen "Good Will Hunting?" I'm sure you have, but incase you haven't there's a scene towards the end where where Ben Affleck's character tells Matt Damon character (who is a bonafide genius) something along the lines of: "Every morning I drive up to your house and wait for you to come out, and a part of me hopes that you're not there. Because that would mean that you've left this place to go on to be something and someone better! Away from here where there's nothing" I don't know the exact quote but I say that to say: I/We don't see you as much anymore, but I know and I truly believe that it's because you've gone on to be something and someone better. You hear stories about people who come from the hood and go on to be amazing things, doctors, lawyers, politicians and whatever other character that's responsible for all the good and the general progression of society. But so rarely do we know those people personally. You the brother I don't get to see often but I'm always hearing good news that continues to make me proud of you man! You may change the world some day some how, but when you become a hero I'll be able to say "Please, he was my hero back when he was still chillen on the stoop!" How real is that? How many people know their heroes since before they had a costume? Love you meng.

H - Young Capital H/Hernan, you here baby! Too often I read over what I've written when I'm paying homage to my team and think to myself, "Damn son, how the f&*k I leave out H?" Not this year homie, you here and you should know in my book, you've been here all along. You're just the owner of an I.D. that states your old enough to hang now. Lol I love chillen with you and being in your presence cuz. You're so full of creativity and drive. Inspiration and great potential. I think you gonna be the stylist of the world cuz, and not just with clothes, I mean with any and everything you decide to put your hands on! Real rap. Let's take over together cuzzo.

Ry Play - My lil Cuz/Big Bro... Lol, and you know why I call you both. You aint never counted out homie.... You off doing your own thing, living a life that some of us don't even know exist. It's such an honor to feel like you're learning from someone, even more so when that person is younger than you (Only in literal age tho) I can't wait to go over to the other side of the fence and take that walk of life with you cuz. I know you'll be there to help shed light on the path. I love you man, come home soon G! We miss you out here.

Penny - Perse's man since who knows how long. But as a whole you know how we do, my man's man is my mans too. And even if you weren't Perse's right hand man I think you'd still be the homie. Bruh, I don't know a nigga cooler, calmer and more collected than you b! Lolol, so you know I thank my lucky starts that we got a nigga like you on our corner. You the homie and like I done said about the others her, blood couldn't make us any closer meng. Be cool like I know you always gonna be Cool! lol

Dwayne - Hank McCoy himself! Damn D, where the hell did 10 years go b? Lol, I still can't believe it's been a decade sometimes. You know how people have friends.... I've realized that I don't think I believe in the concept of friends, there's the family that God places us in and there's family that we consciously choose, you are def a part of the ladder. We been through our ups and downs as homies and we still homies. That's just living proof that we have a bond as thick as thieves, and if it hasn't been broken yet it never will be. I know we gonna have each others back from now til the big man calls us man! Love you homie. Give em Hell out in Boston while you there too, and hurry back, you know we don't fucks with Sox and other shit like that! Lol

Fray - Another One! LOL! Every single time I think to myself "Damn, son, I'm going to hell for that one" the thought is followed by "Well, at least Fray will be there with me" LMAO! And believe me brother, I mean that with the utmost love and respect for you. You that member of the family that EVERYONE knows not to look at when an old man falls and screams in pain and agony cause EVERYONE knows you gonna have the face, the "Aight, I know it's wrong to laugh so I'm gonna try not to laugh" face. And Lord knows if I look at that face Imma LMAO with you lolol. It's good to have niggas like that on your team. Glad we brothers man! Continue to be who you are, Eff what the world thinks, says, or tells you to be.

Chris CFK - You didn't think I was gonna leave you out right homie? I'm not even gonna mention the photography aspect of it cause you already know. Beyond that, as a ~~friendship~~ a brotherhood I have such a deep respect for you. You're a teacher by nature and because of that I know you're going to be an amazing Father to lil Tristan. He and Kay are very fortunate to have a head of family like you. I got love for you cause you just a cool dude that's tryna make his mark on the world in the cleanest way possible, and naturally because I'm tryna do the same we click. Thanks for everything homie, I don't think I'll ever stop thanking you, so you might as well get used to it... You don't even have to say "You're welcome" anymore... lolol.

The Girls - Every last one of ya. My female cousins. Lindsay, Julie, Roxanna, Bianca, Nitza (even tho she's NEVER around, but I know she's gonna read this) lol. Jerilyn, Mercy, Ieisha, Sue, all the younger ones, Samantha, Denissa, Alex, all of ya. I love ya more than words can explain. So when I ask ya to go get me a plate of food take it as a sign of love. It's like saying "I trust you with my food cause I know you'd never cause me any harm...." And that says a lot. being trusted with food is BIG Business! LOLOL.

My Health
(Or whatever is left of it)
I thank God that I am and continue to be a healthy young man, born with no deformities or illnesses. And that's not at all a jab at anyone who was born that way, it's just something that too many of us take for granted and gorget to say "Thank You" for. So I'm saying it for all of us "Thank You."

*Oh and to the future Mrs. Bull, I been single long enough baby. I'm ready for you to come home to me!

And I guess that's it... To anyone I might have left out, please don't think I don't like you or have love for you, the things/people I mentioned are just those nearest to me. The ones that I see on a regular basis. So don't think I forgot you, I see you there, and I appreciate you for being here. Thanks for them too lord.

So I guess this is the wrap-up. On the eve of my 24th Birthday, I'm just thankful to be here man. I have another 367 days before I beat that ugly "No living passed 25" statistic. Lol. Take care ya. I may be M.I.A tomorrow, but I'll try to come back next week with pictures and a few words to express how much fun I had.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Gay Kids

2011-08-11T10:12:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: This blog post has a lot to do with homosexuality and I would greatly appreciate you reading it all the way through and understanding each word before you decide to comment in a negative light or make me out to be some sort of monster. I don't need any gay rights activist on my ass for this.

Aight gettin right into this topic. I woke up today and did my norm. Brushed my teeth, washed my face, had breakfast and decided to check facebook before I get strarted on whatever work I have to do. On facebook I came across my homie Fray's status mentioning something about a petition to allow Bert and Ernie (The lovable Sesame Street characters) to be/get married on the show. I kinda brushed it off but then on my homegirl Ina's blog, the same topic was mentioned. I for one do not at all agree with this and I will tell you why.
You see my problem is not with homosexual people, and I want that to be understood. Although some do irk me because of the way they choose to behave, but this is not about that. My problem is with your sexual preference being shoved and forced down other people's throat. I know I use it as a defense to my case each time this subject is brought up, but I have a cousin who is a huge lesbian. She could even pass for a man faster than I can, but I love her no less. Granted i don't see her often, but when I do I hug her and treat her the way she should be treated, like a human being. If I had a gay cousin or other family member, the same would apply to him. I have no problems with gays what so ever. None. But I do have a problem with gays throwing their business in my face. Understand where I'm coming from? Do you see where I'm going?
It's one thing to throw it in my face but it's quite another to expose this whole topic to impressionable children. I personally think it's wrong and borderline morally irresponsible to do such a thing. Sesame Street has been around for longer than many of us have even been alive. It's taught billions of children how to recite their ABC's and count their 123's. But do we really need it to teach our children what homosexuality is... I mean we've never had to teach the children of heterosexuality right? No one ever force fed opposite sex relationships to the kids. Big Bird never Gloria, or any of the other females on the show, so why should Bert and Ernie be married? I mean we all grow up and think those 2 are gay anyway, they're always together, they argue and bicker like a married couple and might as well sleep in the same bed as close as their beds are. But that all comes from the loss of innocence. As a kid you don't think that way because you're just not thinking about sex or anything sexual for that matter. And that's exactly what Marrying Bert and Ernie will do to the children, remove their vail of innocence. This is no different than exposing your children to sex too early. Is this not why you don't allow your children to watch HBO and MTV before a certain age? Because there's way too much obvious sex going on? Girls wearing close to nothing, grown people grindin on each other in music videos? How is that any different then saying "Hey boys and girls, you are all invited to Bert and Ernie's Wedding this Saturday?"
If a child grows up to be a young adult who is attracted to the same sex, sexually or otherwise, then that is just fine, but only, ONLY if that is the young man/woman's decision they made on their own. Not a decision based on confusion and force feeding from the media and the people around them. No one had to tell me or my little brother "You're gonna grow up and like woman, not men" these are things you allow your children to decide for themselves. The same way society doesn't flaunt being heterosexual, and don't give us an annual "Straight Parade" it shouldn't overly flaunt and heavily promote gays. If you're a homosexual then okay, I understand, but please don't force it on me. That's no different than forcing religion on someone. And please excuse me for mentioning that because I wanna keep religion as far away from this discussion as possibly. I wanna argue with y mind, not my Bible. But you get where I'm goin with this.
So as far as this topic is concerned, please let the record show that I have no problems with gays and lesbians. To each it's own but I do have a problem with you trying to make the entire planet gay like you. That's wrong! This also does not mean you go bashing gay people, or making them feel like outcast, be supportive of their decision, I just don't want anyone forcing anything on anyone else. I hope I've made myself clear.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

C'mon Kryptonite....

2011-08-09T08:10:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer: The following is a side of Eno Bull that no one but those very close to him ever really get to see... The hopeless romantic (I don't like the term sucker for love.) In fact, I won't even promote this blog post. I know my true followers will see it, and I hope it reaches who it's intended for. You've been warned. I read a status on Mylez' page yesterday that read "Hide a message in plain sight, and see who's paying attention" or something to that effect. And so that is what I'm doing with this post.

So here I am awake way before my usual wake up time, again. This has been going on for some time now and I can't understand why. But why question anything right? Anyway, what's more interesting then the time I've been waking up is what's been on my mind every morning before starting my day. I call her my Kryptonite, and I'll explain why in a minute. See the way I am with females is just a little different than how any man is with females, but just a little. As you may or may not have gathered from the previous post, I'm no longer the "lovey dovey, be nice to her and see how far you get with her" type of dude, cause those guys don't get no ass. I'm a muh effin wolf out here! No fear when I howl at the moon. Lol, But that does change when I come across a female that I actually like. It's not "Damn, I'd fix her" or "Shit, that bitch got the cake" it's more like "I wonder what she does on her free time" or "I gotta know what makes this girl tick." You see the difference? For the most part I'm tryna hit it and quit it, leave all my feelings for this broad in the condom I used on her. But when I really like a girl, I'm interested in finding out everything about her, and sex is nothing more than a thought far off in the distance.

Trust me, I haven't really liked a girl since HS.... And that was the ex. Once me and her broke up, I saw it as my emancipation into the wild. Lol. So for me to even be sittin here typin all this out, and to tell everyone who I sit and converse with about this girl, you and I both know it's a big deal.
But I'm scared.... And I know that's not an admiral trait, but not scared in the usual way, more so scared of what I'd be missin out on if I approach her and say "Listen, I'm really feelin you and I'd like to see what can become of us"and get shut down with anything but an "Okay, let's do it." Scared that she does find a spouse and the nigga aint shit, and treats her like dirt. Feel me? I've known this girl for about a year now, and I call her my Kryptonite cause whenever I'm around her I'm playin it cool, but in all reality, inside, right under my clothes I'm shakin, nervous and I swear my voice is crackin... Again, I haven't felt like this since HS, back when I wanted to tell Jennifer how I felt about her, back when me and Steph were "ride or die" Bonnie and Clyde. This has to be how Obama felt waiting to find out if he won the election, this got to be how rappers and entertainers feel before they hit the stage of a large audience. The same steady shake that a sniper feels right before he pulls the trigger that fires the bullet that bodies the hostage taker. Could it be? I'm sure she'd ask "Why do you like me so much.." and even tho I despise that question, hearing it from her wouldn't bother me, cause I'd have a legitimate answer. I won't share that with ya tho cause if she's reading this I want to at least save that for her eye and ears only. Have I blabbed on long enough? Honestly I don't even know what I've written up to this point, I just blacked out and let my mind do all the talkin... But what would she think of a nigga that can't be man enough to tell her all this in person? Which is why I tell myself, next time we chill imma tell her how I feel about her. Imma let her know that despite our situations I'd be the best dude she'd ever be with, cause I know I am. But until then I guess this blog, this personal journal entry will do. So yeah, to the lovely young lady who always keeps it Trues N loves her Tattoos, this one is for you. You know who you are. If you read this, let me know you read it, even if your response is anything but "Okay, let's do it"

-Eno-

Tell Em Why You Mad! Vol. 1

2011-08-03T21:40:00.000-07:00

What's goin on Bull Penners? For those of ya who know me, ya know I'm cool, but deep down, I'm an angry individual. Lol, Not seriously, but enough to make you pray to the Lord above that you don't find yourself on my bad side. Recently I've been (sorta) confronted by 2 women from past chapters in the book of Eno. This lead me to the thought of what my big Homie Dos (Diggy) told me. "You should really consider a video blog" she said to me last time she was in NY. You know what? That's exactly what I'll do. These bitches done found themselves on my bad side. lol:

Tell Em Why You Mad! Vol. 1

^Dependin' on the type of reviews this one gets I'll make it a regular thing. (Like once a month or sumn. So let me know and Tell these hoes to know their places! lol

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Kill It!

2011-07-25T23:09:00.000-07:00

"Racism still alive, they just be concealin it...." - Kanye West

Sup Bull Penners? So I literally started this blog post the day of the Casey Anthony verdict, but simply didn't have the motivation and drive to finish it. However, recently, I've refueled my tanks and I'm geared up to not only finish, but to add to the topic of race and discrimination. So without further ado, Here's my new post:
____________

What's goin on folks? How's everybody feelin? I hope things are cool.

I really really really didn't wanna blog about this chick Casey Anthony cause, well cause I sincerely don't care about the problems of the world. Call me what you want, but I have my own problems to worry about and I have close friends and family who go through things that matter more to me than something that happened to people who I've never met or heard of in my life. More than anything I'm getting real tired of the race card being played tho.

All over the internet, Twitter, FaceBook, and blogs everywhere you got people upset over the verdict of this trial saying things to the nature of "Oh, she's white so of course she got away with it" and dumb shit like that.... Uhhhhh, did we all forget about a man named O.J. Simpson? We all know that mother fucker killed his wife, and he got away with it, and he was BLACK! So what's the argument now? I mean are we still blind to the fact that the system is designed to work for and protect itself, not the people? Cut it out ya, Kill that noise.
________________

Continuation:
Aight so by now that whole topic has died down, which doesn't surprise me either. No one is talking about the trial, the case, the verdict, in fact everyone is back to their every day lives tweetin nonsense and puttin allll their problems on facebook. Aren't trends just grand? Anyway, controversy never sleeps right?
Recently a picture of a newspaper article has emerged on the internet. The article is said to be written be a member of the KKK, (please do not quote me on that) but regardless it is written by a white person. The article addresses African American "Gang Bangers." In the letter this man thanks the black man in America for successfully killing 4000 that's (Four Thousand) black men since 1975.... Did you understand what you just read? Since 1975 til today 2011 4,000 black men have been killed by fellow black men. Sad right?
So when I saw the picture on a friends fb page I applauded the passage. But before you lynch me like I know you want to, give me a minute to explain. You see this man, whoever he may be literally just wrote the words that I've been saying for as long as I can remember. Shit, I hate niggas. Not Black men, Niggas, "Gang Bangers"as he put it. Why you ask? Why not? Niggas aint shit. What good to us is a black youth who doesn't have a concept of a waistline? Pants tied at the knees, can barely put together a full sentence but knows exactly how to aim to kill another man who looks just like him? Please tell me, what sense of pride should I feel knowing that this dude on the bus who looks like me is carrying a weapon or is carrying drugs and has possibly killed before? Don't get me wrong either, do whatever you have to do to survive homie, Lord knows I aint tryna bump heads with you. I'm not tryna preach or come off like my name is Bill Cosby either. All I'm saying is that despite the authors race, the word, the WORDS he wrote were very truthful and well written.

When I said that the man deserved a medal in my comment a young lady took serious offense to it. This young lady said that she couldn't understand how a black man like myself can sit here and defend this man and make him out to be some sort of master or superior being. While I don't know where she ever got the notion that I was making him out to be a superior being, I responded to her and told her what I am about to tell you who are reading this. You see I wasn't defending a man, I wasn't defending a race, I was defending a mind that verbalized the thoughts that were being thought at the moment that this article was written. What should it matter what color this man is? In fact let's make it a race issue for a second: If Kanye West had been the author behind this article would it have been as controversial? If the words were written by me, right here on this very blog site, would it make your skin crawl? No right? Why because I'm black. And so what you're saying is that a Black man can bad mouth another black man, but regardless of the things being said being true a white man can't say those things?

This is the double standard that confuses me. Cause when I see any black comedian making fun of all the white people in the audience, the black people are holding their stomach, running out of breath from the severe amounts of laughter. So a white man can't do the same thing in his own way? People, listen to me: There is NO room for that kind of mentality in today's world. What's good for the goose is good for the gander, or however that saying goes. You can't support one and shun the other.

I don't know why this bothers me so much but if I sat here and wrote about it it's obviously buggin me. You know I know a man who actually told me to my face one time: "White people were originally monkeys, and I don't care what you tell me, even the ones with girlfriends are gay." Wow dude, really? How is that ANY different from a white man saying that about a black man? Cause I know in my heart if he heard a white man say that he'd flip. So where does all of this come from? Segregation doesn't exist anymore, we don't have to sit on the back of the bus, we don't drink from separate water fountains.... We are actually allowed to interact with one another now, and learn from each other. And don't get me wrong, I make my jokes and statements about white people, but they are never very different from the very same statements I make about black people. So I can understand jokes, but when you're convinced in your ignorant opinions there's a problem.
I feel like I'm just rambling on. The point of this is simple, Black, White, Asian, Hispanic, whatever, we are or at least should be one race. The Human race!

Kill that noise ya. Lynch ignorance, not people. White people (those of you who hate black people) look at it this way, you're no different than the ones who hate you. Look at that, you have more in common than you thought. You're a black man too! Lol, how discolored does that make your confederate flag look now? And to the black people (those of you who hate or have ignorant thoughts about white people) think about it like this: You saying the dumb shit about them should automatically give them the right to crack jokes and make the same ignorant statements about you. So next time you hear one slip and say "Nigga" or crack jokes about your big lips, remember when you were making fun of the way he walks, or the time you cracked jokes on the skinny jeans he wore with flip flops. I hope ya see where I went with this. Hopefully One of ya got it, and if I didn't change anything I at least know that I sleep well at night knowing I have no problems with anyone in particular, if anything, I hate everyone the same doesn't matter what color you are! Lmfao! But be safe ya...

Check out the picture of the article:

^The truth is the Truth regardless of who it comes from^

^*Bonus* I hate to be cliche, but check it out^

How different are we now?

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Forty Stacks!

2011-07-07T23:22:00.000-07:00

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! 40,000+ Views!

Aight this celebration is a lil premature due to the fact that a more fitting milestone would be fifty thousand. But who cares. This is my blog and I can celebrate when I want for what I want. Lol, but above all else I'd really, simply like to take this time out to thank ALLL my readers. From the ones who stop by every single day just to see if I updated, to the people who've only clicked my link by mistake. Lol I appreciate each and every last one of you. I feel the need to stress this as often as possible: "My blog started as a personal journal which eventually found its way on to the internet. My intention was never to speak to the people from the mountains..." But I guess if Forrest Gump can simply pick up and run and pick up about a thousand followers I can pick up a few myself huh? Lol. In all honesty I feel that this blog has helped me grow over the passed 3 years (In August.) I've gone back to read a few of my old post and I can honestly say that (at least in my opinion) the blog has matured with me.

So for those of ya who follow me, either from the gate or recently, this is a milestone for you as well. From an addicted sneakerhead with a few opinions, the the dude up the block with the dreads, to the young men who learned to appreciate dressings up as much as he appreciated white tees, to the man you see here before you. A photographer, a self proclaimed Renaissance man, a young adult who's only getting better with age... Some people rap, some people play sports, some exercise, I write a blog. So for those of ya who see me as the Lebron, or the Jay-Z of the blog game THANK YOU. To those of you who don't like my blog.... what you doing here then? Lolol, But really folks like I said considering I started this for my own personal therapeutic outlet its good to see that people are actually listening. I will continue to appreciate ya.

Be Safe... I have a very serious blog post coming early next week (possibly Sunday night) for ya. So make sure ya tune in aight? Dueces!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!
40,000+ Views and Hopefully 80,000+ more to come.

Times are Changing

2011-07-02T10:29:00.000-07:00

Or is it people who are changing? Lol

Sup World? How ya been? I'm back with another one, so pull up a seat and enjoy.
So the other day a person that I know, (who shall of course remain nameless) became the topic of discussion in a conversation I was having with my friends. This person is now a member of a different religion than he or she was raised in. Which is just fine by me, I couldn't care less what religion a man is, whatever works for you... This person is not much of a preacher but at least in one moment in time he or she did tell me that something I was doing was wrong.... (Confused face here.) Now naturally, I understood what he or she was saying, but with all due respect, what you were doing prior to becoming "Enlightened" and what not was not much different.

But we'll come back to that....

Moving on to another page in the same story: I was on the block the other day when I ran into a senior Hoodrat. For those of you who don't know, a "Senior Hoodrat" is what I call any hoodrat older than 30. More often than not, they still partake in any and all hoodtat activities. Fucking the owner of the corner store, getting in fights, having kids after menopause (don't ask me how she did that) etc. etc. But I digress. I ran into this senior hoodrat that was in town visiting family. See she moved away from NY about 2 or 3 years ago and I guess it was for the better, however, without even being asked she made it her business to tell me how much she doesn't wanna be here anymore. She's been here (visiting) for a few weeks and wants to go (to her new) home because people here (in the Bronx) "don't change, don't grow up, and the only place they chill is in front of their buildings." WHOOOAAAAHH! You might want to tell that high ass horse of yours to slow down baby. Cause just before you decided to leave the state you were doing the same thing. I done seen you out here with your hair in rollers and a scarf numerous times....

So, I started to think about it and I spoke to Mylez about these incidents, and he being the very positive and bright side see-er that he is, he said something that I kinda thought myself. He said that people change and sometimes it's for the better and seeing that makes them want to bring people with them to their side of the fence.
Truth be told, I agreed with that. What I don't agree with is you preaching to me about calling women "bitches" when, if memory serves me correct I learned from you... Further more, it's only been 4 months since you last used the word yourself. I can respect the fact that you've found a quiet, peaceful residence where neighbors take their children to the park. But don't look down on me for chillen on the stoop, cause if memory serves me correct, you were just sitting here with me a year ago in your beach chair, hiding your open liquor container when the police was driving by.

Yes, I like to spend some of my summer evening on the stoop with my homies, yes, I do disrespect females who disrespect themselves. Yes I still enjoy watchin a stripper shake her ass on stage. That doesn't make me some sort of animal, simply makes me different than you this week. So don't come down on me, you were riding shot gun with me just a few months ago. You may be clean now but you had to wash off all that dirt to get there.

I guess it's not what you say, but how you say it. And above all else, remembering where you came from. You may not be proud of your past, or where you grew up. You may not be proud of the things you used to do, and that's just fine if you've corrected those mistakes, but you have to realize that those things can't be changed. Looking down on those who were around and with you in those stages of your life only makes you come off as a stuck up, arrogant prick. I mean I'm sure if I decided to go down a different path in life I would want my peers to join me, but the key is not to force it down anyone's throat.
So remember folks, nothing at all wrong with change, especially if it's for the better, but please, don't make me feel like I'm wrong for not changing with you. Remember I was there when you were a hooligan, a criminal, and or a bird, you don't want me to tell all your new friends who you were 2 or 3 years ago do you? Lolol...

Stay Up and Stay Tune Ya...

Attn: (Ladies and Gentleman) Pt. II

2011-06-26T14:04:00.000-07:00

Sup ya? As promised I'm here with Pt. II of this post.
_____________

So Khaya was obviously annoyed, and she didn't have to tell me, it wasn't blatant, but it was written on her face. This is not the first time this has happened. I can remember every single time I've chilled with her and each time this has been an occurrence.
So she told me "I mean what good is all the attention if it's not from the person you seek it from? I can get all this attention from everyone and still feel lonely." Damn Love.... I feel you mama. This goes back to all the times I've spoken of human nature. You know how it goes, I like Kim, but Kim likes Shawn, all the while Melissa likes me but I aint interested in her. Shawn likes Jessica and ignores Kim, and in the end no one gets who they want. Aint that a bitch? We become infatuated with the one that ignores us, and ignore the one who is infatuated with us.

So I told her, I guess you have to at the very least appreciate that, because there is people who kill for that attention and go out of their way to get complimented. I then told her: "I don't get ANY attention from the opposite sex." She replied with "I don't believe that" proving yet again that woman's intuition is all too real. Lol, I guess I do get the attention from women, however it's not the attention I want. I told her about times I had to shut girls down because I wasn't feeling them as much as they were feeling me. This all lead to a simple question: "Is it better to receive all the attention in the world from the opposite sex, even if you never get it from the person you want it from? Or would you rather not get any attention at all? Interesting topic to say the least. Me personally? I guess I'm alright with not getting any attention as long as the one I'm paying attention to notices me.

Attention!

2011-06-23T15:01:00.000-07:00

Sup Bull Penners? Aight, so initially I was going to make this a co-host thing and co-write this with my homie Khaya. However, after reading what she wrote I thought to myself that I'd only water it down if I posted my words alongside hers. So with that said, please enjoy, comment, and respond to her post. Tomorrow I'll post my words and thoughts on the subject, (possibly) along with a question. -Eno-
____________________________

It was a quiet evening in downtown NYC- warm, but not sticky, and right after the hustle and bustle of rush hour, so the serenity of the city resonated well with my friend Eno and I, as we strolled aimlessly past assorted eateries and shops. As we wandered, we passed a young male walking in the opposite direction, who suddenly began screaming and shrieking, seemingly at me. This strange, but ordinary reaction sparked a rhetorical question from my boy Eno. “I guess its something you get used to huh?” I thought pensively for a few minutes and replied, “Getting a lot of attention means nothing if it’s not received from who you’re seeking it.” Most people believe women love attention. And to an extent, this is accurate. On any given day, an (attractive) woman gets stared at, glared at, lusted over, holla’ed at, tweeted, poked, messaged, texted, about fifteen times a day. (Number based on my own personal experience) And when women get dressed in their favorite pair of heels, their most flattering dress, and style their hair to perfection, there is absolutely no feeling more affirming than to walk down a crowded street and be complimented by a complete stranger. If you’re a young woman, you walk away smiling to yourself and if you’re an older woman, you walk away smirking, thinking “I STILL got it!” Similar to being surprised with roses at work, unexpectedly (and genuinely) being complimented can truly brighten your day. Attention from the opposite sex can make one feel good and also give an ego boost. But sometimes when the attention becomes too much, or it is someone you are least interested in, it becomes unbearable, annoying or even embarrassing. There are few instances more frustrating than being pursued by a person you barely even notice. After awhile, it’s frustrating, you stop smiling politely and start muttering “Why can’t I just be left alone?! All I want to do is walk down the street in peace! Is that so much to ask?! “One day, after a similar circumstance happened to me, I wondered if I would be so annoyed if the attention I was receiving was welcome. Would I have the same mind-set if I received these accolades by a person I actually had an interest in? And after thinking about it, the answer is no. It would mean the world to me if that one person I was attracted to would call text or compliment me all day long. But when the attention comes from someone whom you have absolutely no interest in, it falls on deaf ears. You’re too busy thinking about the one you’d rather be hearing it from to truly care. I think I can speak for most women when I say, we definitely want the love and attention from men, just not all men. We want attention from men we love and find our attractive, however the number of admirers women have tend NOT to fall in the category.

-Khaya-

Father's Day

2011-06-19T10:44:00.000-07:00

Ayo.... I'm sittin here, got Juno on my lap trying her hardest to console me...

I just reminded myself how emotional I am. I'm here tryna blast this music to escape my own mind and the thoughts that it's playing in my head. It's not working. I'm sitting here literally tryna "Man Up" and stop these tears from pouring down my face. I'm glad no one is here with me, cause I don't wanna have to answer anyone's questions, sittin here cryin like a lil kid. I guess it all finally hit me, I've finally broken down. But maybe writing about it will help some.

I had one of those in depth, heart to heart, son and mother conversations with mom early this morning. We were here on the couch just choppin it up about everything. We do this every once in a while. We broke night just talking, enjoying each others company. Of the topics, of course my father was one of em. I told my mom that I've given up on trying to be friends with him, I told her that I've tried to be the bigger man in the situation for far too long and now... I'm done. I'm gonna be 24 in August and in that time I can't remember ONE conversation that he and I have had, not even a "Hey, how's school son?" "Is that your girlfriend?" I mean damn fam, I live with the man. That shit hurts b! And even while I was talking to mom about it, I felt like I was puttin up a good front. I been hiding behind this chip tooth'd smile of mine for a very very long time. I woke up today after a night of hangin out with the fellas (Sue's fathers day cookout) and I got on facebook. Of course the trend is fathers day. Everyone wishing their father a Happy Fathers day, people wishing all the fathers of the world a Happy Fathers day, posting pictures of them and heir fathers, or just their father as their default. The web is just filled with love to the men who have been there for their children right now. And all that did for me was remind me of the only picture I have of my old man sitting me on his lap as a kid. He has a smile from ear to ear, and I promise you that's a man that I no longer know. I gave all my niggas daps and hugs last night. Reg, Perse, Penny, I even wished Melissa a Happy fathers Day. Dirt wasn't there but happy father's day nigga! Mayo, Killa, Happy father's day to ya as well. My big brother Chris (CFK,) Happy Fathers day broski. And thinkin about it reminded me of the relationship I have with mine. My mom left with my little brother to Honduras back in April. The 13th to be exact, and whether you believe it or not that's the last time me and my father have spoken any words between us. And to top it off it was a big fight where we all but physically hit each other. Can you picture living with a person that you haven't said peep to in over 2 months and very little before then? I talk my shit, and I say what I say, but the ONE person I can't lie to is myself. I love my father, I do, and I sincerely appreciate all he's ever done for me, and will continue to do for me. But I can't lie to myself and tell myself that I like him and its because he's so damn cold with me and the family. He's the life of the party with his friends, smiles and jokes and laughs, but at home is a straight faced mute that gives us (his family) the feeling that we're a severe burden on him. What did I do? What did we do?

Like I said, I been frontin for some time now.... I miss my pops man, I want him back, and quite frankly I've been treating this relationship like glass. It's broken, and we can try to glue it back all we want but once glass is broken, that's it. Right?
I don't know man. And by the way, I guess I found something that music and writing can't fix for me....
Took a lot for me to write this man, but when it's all said and done, These are just words.

The World we Live In

2011-06-16T14:44:00.000-07:00

Is the world where some people bring guns to the beach!

What's going on ya? I wasn't going to discuss this with ya, but It's really been bugging me long enough to the point where I figured: "If I'm still thinkin about it, might as well let it out the best way I know how..." In fact I'm still not ready to discuss it but I read a lil Facebook note the other day (from an author who shall remain nameless) that threw me over the top.
So here we are, sometime early last week I was sitting at home with my little brothers when Rudy informed me of a shooting at Brighten Beach in Brooklyn. You heard correct: Shooting at the beach. At first it sounded like some sort of strange joke, but he told me that a friend of his had been at the beach and was now on FaceBook cursing out the world because a friend of his had been killed and a few others had been wounded. Me being who I am I still couldn't process the idea of a gun at the beach. Well apparently something went wrong (as it often does when you get too many niggers at the same place at the same time) and gun shots rang out leaving 4 people wounded and a teenage girl dead. So my brain started to race trying to imagine what could possibly happen in someones life to make them paranoid enough to carry a gun to a beach. And then at the beach what could happen to make said person draw their weapon and shoot at (seemingly) innocent people?

I know what it was, "NOTHING" a whole bunch of nothing. Just some ignorant, dick headed, embarrassing ass, young NIGGA. A young nigga who felt the need to "Rep his hood." A young bastard who possibly can't even read well enough to learn where the gun originated. A stupid nigga that felt he was "Live" like these lil dick heads these days like to say. Maybe somebody scuffed his sneakers, are black people still gettin shot over that?

But there wasn't much need for my brain to over think. Why you ask? Because of course in today's world everyone has a camera phone and the sole intention behind fuckery is: "Imma put this on YouTube." Or, "Oh shit, imma upload this to World Star:" And sure enough that's what happened two different prospectives were recorded of the girls lifeless body on the ground surrounded by a million people and police and both videos were posted on YouTube and World Star Hip-Hop. Every body wants to be a reporter on the scene and all that's happening is an entire race of people racing for their demise being embarrassed and profiled along the way. Dude there's bitches out here in 2 piece bikinis and thongs, how could you possibly have any violent thoughts right now? It must have been the 102 degree weather huh?

But before I get even more heated and make this an issue about race, let's get into what it's really about. This generation: I apologize to those of you who are in the 13-20 age bracket who are like I and my friends were when we were that age. The ones who do what they have to without bothering people, without getting into trouble with the law, without feeling the need to fight with guns and knives instead of hands or even greater a mind. I apologize to you because what I am about to do is generalize and it won't feel good if you do not apply. However still bare with me because it needs to be said, and more importantly it needs to be heard.
You lil niggas aint shit! I mean call me old school, call me a grandfather or whatever, but I remember comin up if someone said "beach," I automatically thought: good times, smiles and sunshine, waves and babes. Yeah it sounds corny but in all my 23 years of livin I NEVER thought I'd hear about a shooting on the beach, because I could only think of all those things I just said and I know I'm not the only one who feels this way. I spoke to Buddy about it and the only thing we could find ourselves stuck on was "Who brings a gun to the beach?"

I tell you man if it's this bad now I might as well not even bring children into this rotting world. I don't even know what I want to say anymore.
I guess all I can do is pray. pray to God that this is not the sign of the end but a sign that things have gotten so bad that they can only get better. Pray that these young black men stop trying there hardest to represent their so called block which they don't even pay rent on. Pray that someday soon one of these rappers with such a huge influence makes peace trendy... Am I reaching too far now? I hope not. To the young lady who lost her life that day on the beach, I'm pretty sure you walked out of your house thinking, "It's hot, let's go enjoy our day on the beach, it's gonna be a good day." I'm sorry mama. To her family, I know it means little to nothing but I extend my condolences. I hope that you continue to have hope for this cruel world we've been forced to live on.

To the rest of you, anyone who is reading these words, to those of you who try to avoid the nonsense, to pretty much any and everyone please be safe, and remember the bigger picture in any situation. Nothing is worth you or your fellow mans life, at least not at your hands.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.
P.S. Today Tupac Shakur would have been 40 years old had his life not been tragically taken in such an untimely fashion. R.I.P big homie, I'm sooo sorry to inform you that not much has changed since you left us 15 years ago.

Judge Dread

2011-06-06T20:44:00.000-07:00

Aight ya'll I'm back but this time with someone else's words.... As you may or may not know Buddy has a blog and It's been a while since he updated it. So he extended the honor of re introducing it my way. So with no further a due, please check out this blog post that he wrote, and be on the lookout for his again:
_____________________________

IM FEELIN LIKE A HARD-WORKIN MAN WHO CANT GET A LOAN BECAUSE OF HIS BAD CREDIT HISTORY. IM FEELIN LIKE A REHABILITATED FELON WHO'S DEFENSE DOESNT MATTER BECAUSE OF HIS RAP SHEET. SO I POSE A SERIES OF QWESTIONS, IS IT EVER TOO LATE TO CHANGE? AND IF SO, WHEN? WHEN DOES A MAN STOP BEIN JUDGED BY HIS PAST?
      MANY PEOPLE ABIDE BY THE AGE-OLD MANTRA "ONLY GOD CAN JUDGE ME". THEN WHY DO WE CONTINUE TO JUDGE EACH UTHA? THATS THE POT CALLIN THE KETTLE BLACK. SOME EVEN HAVE IT PERMANENTLY WRITTEN ON THEIR SKIN AS A CONSTANT REMINDER. ITS A GESTURE MORE COMMONLY SEEN AMONGST THOSE CONSIDERED "OUTCASTS", OR THOSE WIT A MORE CHALLENGING PAST WE'LL SAY.
   THEY SAY GOD IS COMING SOON, JUDGEMENT DAY IS UPON US. THE DAY WHEN THE WORLD ENDS, AND GOD TAKES ALL THE RIGHTEOUS WIT HIM TO HEAVEN. WHO DOES HE WANT TO TAKE WITH HIM? EVERYONE! UNFORTUNATELY, DAT WILL NOT BE THE CASE, EVEN GOD KNOWS DAT. HE KNEW LUCIFER WAS GONNA TURN ON HIM BEFORE HE DID, SAME STORY WITH JUDAS, BUT HE DIDNT PREVENT IT. WHY? BECAUSE WE ALL HAVE CHOICE, WITH DIS CHOICE SHOULD BE COUPLED WIT EFFORT, WHICH IS THE CATALYST TO AN AMELIORATE CHARACTER.
      U KNO Y WE ALL WONT MAKE IT TO HEAVEN? BECAUSE MANY DONT PUT THE EFFORT FORWARD. WE ARE IN A PROBATIONARY PERIOD WHERE WE HAVE TO MAKE OURSELVES RIGHT BEFORE THE END COMMENCES. HERES THE LOOP, JUDEGMENT
IS COMING ANYWAY. U FOLLOW? GOD IS COMIN AT THE RIGHT TIME, WHEN HE KNOWS THOSE WHO WILL CHANGE, WILL CHANGE. THOSE HE KNOWS DAT WILL REMAIN THE SAME, WELL, WE KNO THEIR FATE.
      THIS ISNT A LESSON ON THE APOCALYPSE, THIS IS A DISSECTION ON THE CONCEPT OF JUDGMENT. AS AN ADULT, I AM HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR MY ACTIONS. THE LEAST I CAN DO IS OWN UP TO THEM AND ADMIT MY WRONGS. IV DONE THINGS IN THE PAST DAT HAS AFFECTED MY PRESENT. IT DOESNT MEAN IM THE SAME PERSON I ONCE WAS, IT MEANS IV MADE MISTAKES. I HAVE A SIDE OF ME I HOPE NO ONE BECOMES FAMILIAR WIT. IF I TOLD U, U WOULDNT BELIEVE ITS THE SAME PERSON. IV HURT LOVED ONES AND HAVE HAD MY WHOLE CHARACTER IN QWESTION BECAUSE OF IT. BUT GOD IS GOOD, AND IM FINALLY AT PEACE. I HAVE A LOVING EAR AT HOME WHO HEARS ME OUT WHEN I NEED HER TO, BUT DIS WAS SUMPTIN I WAS COMPELLED TO SHARE. LOVE IS LOVE. UNCONDITIONAL LOVE IS IRRATIONAL. EVEN IF THERES SOMEONE U DONT CARE FOR MUCH TAKIN DAT STEP IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION, DONT HOLD THE POLAROID OF TRANSGRESSION OVER THEIR HEAD, ENCOURAGE DEM & PRAY DAT THEYVE SUCCESSFULLY COMPLETED THEIR JOURNEY. AND IF THEYVE MADE IT, CONGRATULATE EM & PRAY THEY STAY THERE.

-BUDDAH-
http://mylezmeng.blogspot.com/

Honda Music LP

2011-05-26T22:00:00.000-07:00

Ladies and Gentleman, i know it's been a while since I hit ya with an actual Bull Penesque blog post, but I've just been very very high! High off the rush of helpin my cuz Buddy Mylez (click name to like/follow on FaceBook) get this album done and released for ya. Needless to say it's here:

Brand new, fresh out the oven
"Honda Music" by Buddy Mylez

^Front Cover^

Click Pic to Download Album

^Back Cover^

Click Pic to enlarge.

I promise folks, I haven't loss sight of what the blog is about, In fact, what I'm doing is very much in tune with the blog, Ya know I HATE trash music, so what better way to fight the epidemic then by sharing Amazing music with ya. So in the mean time, support me by supportin my bro Buddy Mylez.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Quarter Tank of Gas

2011-05-18T13:42:00.000-07:00

Yoooooooo! What's goin on folks? Not much needs to be said about what I'm about to post but I still wanted to share a few words. In case you've been living under a rock, you should know that Buddy Mylez is dropping a new album entitled "Honda Music." For those of you who know me you know that I am a tough music critic, and it's not just cause Mylez is my dude but I sincerely believe that this is one of the greatest bodies of music released in some time now. Every one says they spittin "Real Hip-Hop," but I don't think anyone has taken it back to the essence until now. Then again, these are just my thoughts, you judge for yourself.

As for now, check out the second video released from the album: "Quarter Tank of Gas (Honda Music)"

Lemme know what you feel about it. Tell a friend to tell a friend's grandmother who drives a Honda to check out the video. Lol

Stay Up, Drive Safely and Stay Tuned!

My God

2011-05-13T16:59:00.000-07:00

What's goin on folks? So as you know I have my sub blog SummerInNYC on Tumblr. It's pretty cool considering the people I follow and the ones who follow me etc. etc. So one of my followers happens to be an Atheist. But wait, before you condemn him/her give him/her a chance and understand where he/she's comin from (that's something too many religious folks don't do)
Through his/her blog I've come across more and more people who lack a belief in God and have no religion. This is fine by me, however the alarming rate of atheist jumping out of the closets is a lil creepy. Have they always been there and I just wasn't paying them any mind, or is there a reason for them coming out now? About 2 months ago I saw a documentary entitled Religulous by Bill Maher, if you haven't seen it please do so it is amazing. It's pretty much him on the road to understanding others faith and belief in God, almost as if he's trying to find someone who can convince him other wise and convert him from an atheist to a believer. I guess this is what has opened my eyes to this large group of people that I didn't see standing there before. I feel like Nicole Kidman at the end of "The Others." Lol (If you can't understand the reference contact Google.)

But yeah... So I had the opportunity to share a few words with my follower and I took it as a chance to try and understand where he/she was coming from. He/She had some great explanations and reasons for why he/she lost his/her faith. Like many (that I've seen or heard of) he/she began as a believer due to the family he/she was raised in, but there was so much confusion with all the things being taught from the Bible.
I personally understand this because, well c'mon let's be honest the Bible can be a little confusing at times. So after a lil research I learned that there's a few celebrities who are now admitting to being atheist, more and more people coming out of the closets and I'm just like: "Okay, I understand." This blog post is in no way shape or form an attempt to bash, embarrass or expose atheist, it's simply an attempt to give my views on it.

So here they are: Like I said, I understand where these people are coming from. Especially when there's so many questions that have no answers, be they answers from a Priest, a parent, or a fellow Bible study group member. Naturally some sheep will want to leave the herd and go find their own answers. But this doesn't make these people Satan worshipers either, and it doesn't mean that they are evil, or mean or anything of that nature, they simply have a different belief than people like me have.
I personally have said many time: "I believe in God, not religion," because religion is just a big, complex, thing that after so many years has become misunderstood by many, and taken too far by others. I mean I barely knew how to put that sentence together so that should explain how deep religion can go. But, that's no reason to judge atheist, that would be no different than them judging me for believing in God. Discrimination is and should be the same across the board. If anything I guess we could even consider Atheism a new religion. After all, the way I was taught was that religion is just a way of life, a belief system that people follow, so..... Yeah.

Something my aunt mentioned a while back that I think will stay with me for a very long time to come was this: "You put God/Jesus, Buddah, Allah, and any other religious leader or figure in a room and all they will discuss is peace, happiness and agree on things all night. However you put all their followers in a room and there's a good chance that a war may be ignited" I paraphrased a little but you get the picture and that was soooo true. I had to agree, and that is pretty much why Religion doesn't play a huge part in my life, because religion is run by PEOPLE. It doesn't at all change my belief or faith in my God, but it's simply not an aspect of my faith. At least not a strong aspect. I still say grace before I eat, I still pray before I go to sleep, I still thank My God everyday that I wake up and am given a chance to continue to live my life. My relationship with God is MY relationship with God, I don't have to explain what we have, I don 't have to go to church to show the world what we have, it's just me and my God. But my God has taught me not to judge others, and I will not judge those who do not believe in my God and I'm sure your God has taught you the same.
So to all you atheist out there, it's okay, I understand and I will not judge, you aren't doing me or anyone else any harm. Live your lives as I will live mine, we can and should all still live in peace.

This is just something that was on my mind. Thanks for taking your time out to read it.
Stay Up and Stay Tuned

Our First Date (Only a Quarter)

2011-05-04T19:29:00.000-07:00

I'm back with yet another one ya'll! Lol, Ya may call me cheap or whatever else after this one, but you know damn well I don't care what ya think! Lol. So the other day I posted up a "Random Eno Fact" on Facebook and Twitter, and I immediately knew that I wanted to blog about it. So without further a due, let'sget this one started.

The Facebook Status/Tweet:

"RANDOM ENO FACT: I NEVER FEEL COMFORTABLE SPENDING MORE THAN $24.86 ON A FIRST DATE! SHOULD I BLOG ABOUT IT?"

(Copied and Pasted) Lol, The fellas was lovin it and some of the ladies just wanted to know why I would even say something so (I guess to them) Cruel.
So Check me out:
Ya know I am (or at least can be) a gentleman, but even gentlemen can be jerks at times and this is one of those times. See I don't even like "Dates," cause the purpose of a date, to me, is to see if this person is worthy of your time. To feel shorty out and find out how her mind works, to then further evaluate whether or not you'd ever have something serious with her. I.E. relationship, maybe someday marriage and some kids. It's pretty much the first portion of an application process to a job that I already know I aint givin you! Lol. Cause truth be told you know what I'm after baby girl and it shouldn't require taking you out first! (Wow, even I think I sound like an asshole, but that's okay) Granted I would like a gf in the near future but even still my $24.86 budget is relevant. Allow me to tell you why. Now a days "dating" is different, with all the technology dumbing people down, there's not much to talk about anymore on a face to face basis. With all these texts abbreviations, social networking sites and girls showin off their titties on blogs, Skype and Oovoo, there's really no need to meet up downtown somewhere and discuss your week over a nice plate of Chicken Alfredo, and some wine. Pretty much, people don't know how to speak to humans anymore because life has become a conversation via text message and Tweets. And the ones who do know how to speak to humans have forgotten how to formulate a sentence thus making them appear dumb as hell.

So imagine how I'd feel knowing I spent $35.00 on shorty and at the end of it all I didn't get anything out of it, not even intelligent conversation.
I know you sitting there thinkin: "you wrong for that cause you're expecting something out of it!" Uhhhh, DUUUH! No one spends money without expecting something in return for it. NO ONE!
So if I'm treating you to some grub and you gonna bore me with your one word responses, and annoy me with the sight of you textin' every other second the least I expect is for you to touch my penis.

Let's give this just a lil more thought folks, we live in an era of technology and social networks. With Facebook:
I know who you've dated in the past, I know whether or not you have children, I know who you hang out with, you even tell me how you feelin and what you had for breakfast, and when you get out the shower.
On Twitter:
You voice out all the frustrations that you can within 140 characters. You talk your shit, you twitpic your outfit so I know what you wearing today, I see you tweet your friends and you tell them "Hey, let's meet up on Union Square tomorrow at 4."

Let's be real here, I know you already, only thing left now is the love scene, there's no such thing as Courtship anymore. The internet has done that all for us. So naturally if I decide to meet one of my FaceBook friends or Twitter followers in my head I'm thinkin: "I damn near know shorty already she's a go, let's do this." Feel where I'm comin from folks? So there you have it $25 is my spendin limit. Lol

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

Ewwl Nigga! (Bimmer, Benz, & Hookers)

2011-05-03T02:44:00.000-07:00

I was walkin out the house a few hours ago to get in the car with Mylez to go run some late night errands, you know the usual. When I got outside I saw a nice all white 2004 BMW 325i parked in front of Buddy's car (I'm a car guy, I know cars and BMW is my all time favorite make, I'm gonna notice it.) All white, clean, white rims, Dark tints in the back stock clear windows in the front.
So check it: as I'm walkin to the car I see a huge naked ass in the passenger seat of this beautiful machine. And I think to myself "Ooooh snap, sombody got them a nice lil hooker and didn't have the decency to drive 2 blocks down to the Howard Johnson!" Come on Fam! A room is about 80 bucks from around 11pm to 7am (cough) I know that because I used to frequent it with a lady friend, but I digress. So I ask Buddy "Ayo, did you see that?" "Nah what?" "Somebody gettin busy in this car." "Where right here in front of us?" "Yeah, I saw a huge naked ass ridin someone in the dark" So we both laughed. In an attempt to humiliate whoever it was, I turned on my phone, faced the screen out my window as we drove by! LMFAO! the look on homies face was PRIIIIICELESS! He had the look on his face that said: "Oh man, I can't believe someone caught me out here fuckin my prostitute." Yup, you got caught homie, and I'm a lil concerned because I happen to know that most of the prostitutes in my area that I have seen are trannies! Ewwwwwll Nigga! You nasty.

So when I get home I tell Keith about it and I describe the car, and Keith said "Oh yeah, I know that car, he's always picking up that big gay tranny hooker that we see at the store" Ewwwwwwwlll Nigga! Lololol

So I thought, This is wrong on so many levels:

You're in a residential area, you're chances of being caught are about 87%
You're sitting in a very nice, attractive and to an extent, high profile car. You're attracting attention
You gotta pay for Pussy?
And the pussy you payin for is actually Dick? C'mon homie!
There's a Howard Johnson right down the block you could have took you're tranny there.
The hooker is a Tranny, a known and noticeable Tranny
The hooker is a Tranny, a known and noticeable Tranny
Damn homie, you just effed up in the game Lol....

Anyway, I just thought the whole thing was hilarious and wanted to blog about it before I hit ya with another head scratcher this week. Hope ya laughed like I did. I'm sure homie will be back for more and when he does come back I WILL record him for eal and expose his ass on World Star Hip-Hop. Later ya, have a good clean STD free day.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Kissin and Tellin'

2011-04-28T19:25:00.000-07:00

Aight ladies, ya aint think I was gonna let ya slide right? Lol, sit ya beautiful asses down!
Ya read the last post and I know a lot of ya were grateful for the manual I left ya with... But you know I gotta look out for the fellas! Lol, I was just gettin ya out the way first, like I said, I'm a gentleman "Ladies First" but this one is for the fellas.

So fellas remember I said that the ladies go to the wolf to tell them everything about her and her man's relationship? Aight well what makes you think there's anything keepin her from sharing whatever it is you have with her?

This is to the fellas with or without girlfriends. For the fellas that's just bonin their main squeeze. For that nigga that's playin the game and going through as many females as he can. Ya need to know that for every girl you deal with there's 1.5 other people that know how you puttin it down. 1.5 Other girls (and even some dudes) that know all your strengths, weaknesses, short comings and where ever or whatever you excel in. TRUST me fellas.
I know some of ya may be thinkin "Nah, not the joints I deal with," Niggah! (Katt Williams voice) ESPECIALLY the ones YOU deal with! I do admit there's maybe 2 or 3 females that really don't share things from their relationship with their homegirls, but unless you the boyfriend or husband there's a good chance that ya shorty's homegirl knows about those funny faces you be making when you on top and all the posing you doin in the mirror while you hittin it from the back. Lmao. Females might say they don't kiss and tell but there's always that somebody that she shares her sex stories with. This is just how the game goes, which is why we should always be on our P's and Q's (Does anyone know what P's and Q's are? why do we say that? lol Anyway) If we on our P's and Q's then anything bad that she's sayin about us got to be made up.

See pillow talk is a dangerous thing, she may not just be talkin to her homegirl Sheila about it, she might even be tellin the next nigga about how whack you were. Either to boost his ego or maybe because she's so happy to be gettin somethin better that she throws you and your pipe game under the bus. Lol Woman are foul my nigga, but I think it's the bullshit that we love about em.
It doesn't end with just pipe game, it's almost everything. Take a group of like 3 couples all the fellas are tight, they boys, they go watch the game at Will's crib every Sunday and the girls go to the mall.... There's things about Will that Tim knows and Will never told Tim shit about it. Lol and there's def things about Tim that Steven knows and Tim never told him. So how do they know? Cause Sheila, Diane, and Heather is tellin their man everything that these other hoes is tellin each other. So now Tim knows that Will eats ass, and Steve knows that Tim had a gay fantasy about 2Pac back in the day! Lmfao!

Fellas it is imperative that you know who you dealin with and know what to share and what not to share. Cause the girls are definitely talkin! Don't believe me? I know two girls who have absolutely nothing to do with each other and they have both let me hear voicenotes that two completely different dudes sent them. Complainin about not gettin time with them and being head over heels for them etc. etc. Oh yeah, you making yourself too vulnerable is ALWAYS a topic of dicussion at game night. And I been to my fair share of game nights. Lol

I know this one was short and sweet, but it was simply a follow up to the previous post. Be careful with these lil cuties out here. Once you bag you are dealin with at least 2 people and you don't even know it. Lol, So keep doin what you doin but understand that your whole game is being reviewed by the front office and by front office I mean shorty's whole squad! lol.

Be Safe ya.
Stay up and Stay Tuned!

Like Deborah Cox and R.L...

2011-04-24T19:45:00.000-07:00

Baby, "We Can't be Friends"
Lol
I'm baaaaaaaack!

What's good ya? Didn't I tell ya I was comin back strong? Well I'm here with another one.
So the other day I posted a status on Facebook and that status was:

"LADIES, TAKE IT FROM A MAN: YOU CANNOT, I REPEAT, CANNOT HAVE MALE "FRIENDS" TRUST ME WHEN I TELL YOU!"

(Copied and pasted) It of course began to get a lil heated but I figured I'd spill all the beans via a blog post. See ladies, I'm a gentleman, and a lot of guys out there are like me in that sense, but at the end of the day I am still a man. A predator and just because I don't attack does not mean I wouldn't, it simply means that I am not hungry enough to move just yet.
You probably don't follow just yet, so allow me to break it down. Ladies, understand that there are 3 different types of male friends.
There's the

Lion:
This is the male friend that has been around for a while, he's sincere, he does care about and respect the friendship and he's got your back in the event of anything. Has he ever tried to holla? Nah, he hasn't but he has thought about it, and if ever you were to drop your pants in front of him his pupils will dilate. This is the dormant hunger being awoken. See, because he respects the friendship so much he's not gonna over step any boundaries prior to you giving him some sort of green light, cause he doesn't wanna lose the friendship.
So you can chill with this male friend, ya can go to the movies and go hang out, shop on 34th, people watch in Soho, whatever, but you trigger that dormant hunger it WILL go down. This doesn't make him any less of a person, it's just the way the cards are dealt.
*Ya sittin there thinkin "OMG, Mike would never!" Yeah aight, if Mike wouldn't either you ugly as shit or he's gay!

There's also the

Tiger:
This is the one that has told you he wants to do you. He's just like the lion in the sense that he's trust worthy as far as a "friend" is concerned. He got your back, he don't mind just chillen, but he done made it clear that he would put it on you 6 ways from Tuesday if you ever let him. In fact he probably has already boned, and now ya friends with benefits. And if the benefits are seasonal he at least knows "I got it before, I can get it again." You've chosen to keep him around for whatever reason, but his words should never be taken as a joke.

Then there's the

Wolf:
The wolf hasn't been totally honest with you. See the Wolf has come to you in sheep's clothing. He's ONLY around cause he wants to smash and once he's "Eaten" his prey he's out. The wolf might be around for years just waiting for that one moment of weakness. You know how you can tell which one is the wolf, or would have the most potential to be the wolf? The wolf is often the one you run to and share all your marital problems with. "Me and hubby aint gettin along cause xyz." <-Do you realize how dangerous this is? This man now has the Teacher's text book with all the right answers. So now the Wolf is just waiting for the hubby to slip up too hard to get back up. Cause now he knows all the voids to fill.
the Wolf is of course not limited to what was just sated, but he is the one in the shadows. Texts you every now and then asking "So how you been?" Trust me that nigga don't care, "Let's go out and catch up," he tryna get in your pants.
*You probably sittin there thinkin: "Well Derrick hits me up like that, but Derrick has a girl"
Derrick is tryna fuck ladies! (Excuse my French)

I know it seems sneaky and conniving, but it's really not. Lol, it's just how we're wired. Like I said, the Lion and Tiger are really your friends. But they can't take you to the court to play ball with you like they can with their boys, so the extra circular activity in your relationship would be played out in the bedroom. Feel me?

So now that you know these things ladies, figure out what category all your male friends fall into. Cause I know the other day when I posted the status a lot of the ladies were ready to corner me and get answers. No need to corner me, I laid it all out for ya. Understand what I mean next time I say "Men and Woman can't be friends"
Please leave all your comments, questions and concerns, I'm ready, willing and able to address them all.

Stay Up, Be Careful and Stay Tuned.

"Have you Ever Heard a Grown man Cry?"

2011-04-17T19:07:00.000-07:00

First Single of the Honda Music Album....

No Need to speak on it! Check it Out:

You already know how we (B.E. Media) do. Please Follow:

@Deascent
@BuddyMylez

P.S.
I do realize that this past month has been heavily dedicated to videos and promotion but that doesn't mean I'm losing myself or leading any of you astray. To those of you who are my true followers I appreciate you very much and I promise you that I will continue to deliver what you have come to expect and love from 'Tha Bull Pen' as of now I'm just helping my brother reach any and all people he can via his music and my blog. So thanks to those of you who continue to support me/us. I've got some very compelling topics coming your way very soon.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Buddy Mylez on the Cover.

2011-04-13T11:25:00.000-07:00

Again, I'm back with some more Honda Music promo. This one pretty much speaks for itself so there's no need to bombard you with paragraphs and things of that nature.

I do however ask you to read where ever you see words! Lolol
"We aint frontin out here!"

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

3rd Finger Salute

2011-04-10T21:33:00.000-07:00

So you know how I like to share my tattoo stories right? Well the other day I was talkin to my homegirl Lenni and I asked her "What percent of people today do you think get tattoos just for the sake if it being trendy?" She gave me a number that I can't remember but it was somewhere in the high 80's-mid 90's.
Naturally, you know I agreed. Yeah, some of ya is just trendy hoes tryna be down! Yeah I said it LOL. But anyway, it got me thinkin, and it brought me to the promise finger on my right hand. This is the finger where the 3 letters "BXL" lie in ink. For those of you living under a rock BXL is my team. Also a 3 man rap group made up of my brothers Joe Dirt, Severe Persy Jones and Buddy Mylez.

More than just a rap group tho, it's a family. I know it sounds a lil cliche but that's really what it is. A large group of us who support and back the 3 man group. There's Che, Reg, Jazz, Penny, Ryan, Jun, Devo, Blaze, O, Zo, and about 15 other names I can't think of off the top of my head. So naturally 3 years ago while sittin in the shop watching my homegirl Bebe get her tattoo I thought to myself "It's time I got a tangible representation of my affiliation" and called Perse (who was one of the guys who initiated the idea of all of us getting the letters tattooed on our fingers) and asked him "Ayo, what side of what finger is it that we are getting the tat on?" And he told me "On the finger to the left of the pinky on the right hand. The letters should be facing the pinky" I told my (then) artist, "Yo man I want my finger tattooed." Lemme tell ya something that shit HURT! Lol, but I got it, and today, 3 years later it's still one of my most meaningful tattoos. (They're all very meaningful but you see what I mean.)

Initially, while the fellas were going by the name 4T'reign (Che kidd as another member of the group,) BXL was the name of the camp.

BXL = BronX at Large
BXL = Be XL (Be Bigger than Big)
But above all else, we're:
BXL = Brothers eXperiencing Life - Which is what it stands for today.

I guess I'm just postin this to show my love and appreciation for my brothers. Regardless of whatever we go through or whatever happens we all brothers and nothin is gonna break that up. So now you know why me and all the soldiers salute with the 3rd finger. Next time you see me take a picture like that you not only know why, but you also see my family name.

"REP YO SET! B-X-L"

^Myself^

^Joe Dirt^

^Jones^

^Ryan^

So for those of ya who know me, now you know what the "3 Finger Salute" is about, for those of ya who don't know me, understand and respect it when you see it!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

No Maybach Yet (Honda Music)

2011-04-08T21:15:00.000-07:00

So a few months ago Mylez started workin on the new album (Street LP.) The album is called 'Honda Music' and is partially inspired by all the "Maybach Music" and "Aston Martin Music"joints being dropped, all the Phantoms and Maserati's in videos. It serves as a response in a more relatable way. So he decided to run with that title, real Hip-Hop coming from a real artist. Not to take anything away from anyone who does otherwise. So with that said I want ya to check out the the promo video.

Follow Buddy on
Twitter: @BuddyMylez
FaceBook: Buddy Mylez

^Promo Poster^

Picture taken by Me.

Also, if you would like a copy of the bootleg (hard copy, Leaked version) You can email your name and address to BeMedia3@gmail.com and one will be sent to you.

Get ready for this one folks.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

That's my Baby

2011-04-06T10:00:00.000-07:00

No Nigga, that's EVERYBODY's baby! Lol

What's goin on Bull Penners? I been meaning to type this one out for a minute, well now is the perfect time. Lately, despite my never ending attempts to ignore Hollywood and all its nonsense I been hearing alot about this girl dating this guy, this guy going out with this girl etc. etc. etc. Pretty much I'm just witnessing the hallway rumors of high school all over again.

So pretty much (I'm not late, I knew about this since the beginning) Amber Rose (formally Kanye West's arm candy) is currently with Wiz Khalifa. We all know that before Marc Anthony J. Lo was all over the industry, Jennifer Aniston was a serial dater, and Mariah Carey went from an old man to a young with a few niggas in between (I think.) Trina was doin Kenyon Martin so good the nigga went and got her lips tattooed on his neck. That would have been cool but then she started doin Soulja Boy so good that he went and got the SAME tattoo... Aight, please, excuse my French, but, what the fuck fellas? Then there's Rihanna, who provoked Chris to beat her ass like a speed bag and now she may be fondling Drake... Check me out tho, my beef aint with the women on this one, it's with the fellas.

I think my beef stems from the fact that I don't appreciate sloppy seconds. And I appreciate it much less if I know who had the plate first, feel me? See when it comes to women, I'm the kind of man who wants my own. If she has too many miles on her, then at the bare minimum, I'd rather not know who was drivin her before me. I saw that back in high school and couldn't understand it back then, so naturally I definitely don't understand it on a higher level. How are you comfortable being with this chick knowing that she was openly with the last nigga for so long? You know they were intimate.

Number One:
If she goes from rapper to rapper, beware, she could be the Silver Surfer of the industry. For those of ya who do not follow comics or their theatrical counterparts Silver Surfer is one of the "Fantastic Four's" villains. What the Silver Surfer does is arrives on a planet, depletes any and all of its resources and then literally destroys it before leaving it.
i.e. Kat Stacks: Now this bitch amazed me while she was around. We Allllllll knew her m.o. She found whatever relevant rapper she could, slept with him (possibly gave him something more then a good night kiss) and then exposed all his bad habits. Whether his habits were drugs, snoring or if homie just wasn't a great performer in bed she was puttin his business out there on video in HD Doby Digital, the works!
Now, do I think she was wrong for that? To an extent, yes, but I think any man who decides to go home with her knowing what she does to niggas is the fool in this situation. Feel me?

Then of course, Kat's predecessor, Super Head... Now if you don't know about her, Google is your friend! lol
But again these hoes (for lack of a more respectful word) are just gettin in where they fit in. My beef is with the niggas who mess with them knowing they were just with the last dude. And further more knowing that she doesn't have a genuine interest in me, but my pockets.

Am I making any sense? It's weird to me. Like I could never see myself messing with a girl who was recently with a friend of mine. Or even an acquaintance, its just not my style. In fact on FaceBook and Twitter, before I decide to initiate predator mode I see who my mutual friends are with this girl, and if any one of them had anything with her then I immediately fall back. So when I heard that Amber Rose is smart cause she's marrying Wiz, I thought to myself, "Ummmm, no she's not, we all know that these Hollywood marriages last for no longer than 6 and a half weeks." plus she was JUST with Kanye 4 and a half weeks ago. I just don't need to have a face to accompany the thought of your past lovers. Simple. To take it a step further the nigga went and tattooed Amber's name on him! Lmfao! C'mon bruh, you serious? lol

If this is your style then by all means, live it out. I'm not trying to throw jabs at anyone nor am I trying to insult anyone, just sharing how I feel about it. The same way I wouldn't respect anyone who's messing with any chick I was messin with, I couldn't respect myself knowin I'm messin with a chick that one of my mans was dealing with. But like I always say, this is just my opinion, you don't have to like it. Keep it movin like most do, movin into the last niggas goods! Lolol, Later ya.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

No Trespassing (Feeding Time)

2011-04-04T19:59:00.000-07:00

Yooooo! Do I have one for ya tonight!
Aight so around 6:20ish tonight I went to go walk Juno. So on the way back I see a kid going down into the back of a building nearby my crib. I automatically thought to myself "Oh boy, this can't be good" because where he was headed was death! See the sectioned off area where he was going to was the basement level of the building where a few guard dogs (pit bulls) live. So there's about 5 pit bulls (2 of which are puppies) and they all look like they don't take nonsense. Imagine the typical pitbulls, cropped ears big teeth, and adorable eyes but you know damn well they are not to be messed with.

So as I get closer I see the one boy hanging off the side of the fire escape while his big brother (the one in danger) was hanging off a ledge holding on for dear life with the fear of God in his eyes. So before I know it, the leg that was danglin was grabbed by one of the dogs and that's when it was feeding time. In my (almost 24 years) of living my eyes have never witnessed such gruesomeness. The alpha male began to bite the little kid in several places ripping his jeans right off of him while the others went for his limbs and face. they dragged him at least 5 or 6 feet and continued upon moving. The kid screamed "THEY GOT ME" while his little brother looking on in terror screamed "MY BROTHEEERRR, PLEASE DON'T LET HIM DIE! HELP HIM!" A couple had been standing there since before I got there and was starring on in amazement. I asked "Do you have a cell phone?" and the guy replied "She does, she's calling the police. While we waited the mauling continued. The guy gave me a look that said "Go down there and help him," I replied with a look that said "You must be out ya rabbit ass mind brotha!"

So some mauling continued and someone graciously threw a bucket of water out the window over the dogs and they dispersed for a minute. This gave the young boy just enough time to run away but instead of grabbing the ladder to the fire escape he ran further into the basement. I yelled "RUN! RUN!, NO NO, NOT THAT WAY, GRAB THE LADDER" in all the excitement the little boy surely couldn't hear me and ran to the other side of the basement, where the dogs followed. But this time he was okay, he managed to get up on the ledge and waited for the police to arrive as the dogs jumped like alligators jumping from the water to reach some prey. In the blink of an eye literally the police managed to get the kid over to the other side of the fence.

He returned with 65% of his jeans ripped off, his snow boots eaten off his feet with his socks exposed and blood and tears all over. It was a terrible sight to see. The crowd grew while all this was taking place, but once the couple police officers were there I took it as a cue "I'm outta here, I don't eff with police! Plus I will not give a statement!" Lol, Plus I had Juno with me, and there was no way I was gonna let some pigs accuse my baby of anything lol.

Here's My thoughts on the situation:
IT WAS THE KID"S FAULT!
Nah Nah Nah, Don't hit me with no "OMG" or none of that nonsense. The area (as I said) is not easily accessible from the street level, so there is absolutely no justification as to why he was there. What the hell was so intriguing that he wanted to get close enough to get bitten? I mean I myself am about 4 times bigger than the kid and I walk by there almost everyday, and I don't care if my basketball, hat or shoe falls back there, I am NOT going down there. Those dogs look like the bench press 250 pounds a piece and the alpha male barks at me regardless of anything when I walk through. Yeah it's unfortunate that this happened to the kid but I pray that those "GUARD" dogs are not put down over this, at the end of the day they are animals doing what they do, protecting their area and keeping intruders out at all cost. But yeah folks, just keep the kid in your prayers. He was seemingly okay but I don't know if the dogs had rabies or anything that could harm the child or worse.

A Reminder to the kids: Keep ya asses away from guard dogs. Don't be mischievous when it comes to risking your lives. And to lil man and his brother who endured this, my prayers are with ya!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

We Get it in Ohio pt. II

2011-04-02T10:56:00.000-07:00

So Ya ready to hear the rest? Lol

That was Saturday, the day I met one of my long time Twitter Followers Em who came out to support the Empire's Concert. Don't you just love the internet? Lol.
So around 2am it was over and we headed out, hungry we all decided to hit the "Waffle House." If you didn't know, I Effin LOVE Waffle House. I had it for the first time when we had went to Atlanta. Why the hell don't we have at least one in New York, but anyway that's another blog post in itself.

We all got home and chilled for a lil bit. Discussed the show a little and watched some YouTube for a while. The next morning, we all hung around waiting for Sunday dinner. In the mean time Handz had a session downstairs in the studio while everyone else was chillen enjoying their beautiful Sunday. I don't really remember what time it was but Dos had suggested that we do a few videos, and so that's what we did.
D and Young Wise added verses to "NY to Ohio," Payne's song which already featured Buddy, Handz and Jus. Within an hour (if that) of Wise and D recording their verse we headed outside to film the video for the song. Cold as hell boy, but we made it look hot out there. Lol. When we got back in we set up Dos' Studio, backdrop, lights etc. and got started on shooting the video for Empire Livin.' Both came out dope, so be on the lookout for those very soon!

When that video was done we went to meet up with Buddy's homie Shake. Shake is a manager and producer of a few Ohio artist and we got to work with him and 2 of his artist. Brix and Chi City, on a song called "How it Is" I won't tell ya where we shot the video, but I will tell ya that the raw footage came out extremely dope. So also be on the lookout for that one.
When we got back to the studio, Mylez did a few drops for the Bootleg to his up coming Street LP. As he mentioned on one of the drops, he must be the first artist to ever bootleg himself. Lol I mean the Lp is THAT Hot. So there's something else to look out for. Are you keepin track? That's 3 videos and one LP that is droppin very soon. BE Media is on the rise. And we owe a lot of thanks to our Ohio Family. The Empire/Deepest Ent. Family. Once again we can't thank ya enough for inviting us out. It was fun, it was memorable and it was most def productive. Can't wait to do it again soon, til then ya need to add them all on Faceboook and Twitter (Mentioned in pt. I) and check out all their work.
I see ya like family now ya'll. BXL/The Empire this is just the beginning.

Be Safe Ya'll

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

We Get it in Ohio

2011-03-30T13:17:00.000-07:00

Bull Penners I'm back!
The Eff you mean you ain't notice I was gone. Stop lyin' to yaself.

Lol, Nah but for real for those of ya who weren't in the know Buddy had a show to do with his (now also my) people "The Empire" in Ohio. Originally it was supposed to be BXL and myself. However they couldn't make it out. So Mylez felt that I should still go and decided to also invite D (Deascent) to roll with us.
I was excited since I first heard anything about the trip, if you didn't know I love road trips. I love planes more but a road trip for me is a beautiful scenic escape from reality regardless of how brief in time. So I packed my bags and got ready to hit the road. I met my brothers here at my house we hit the train station and our voyage began around 8:45pm on Friday night.

We reached Ohio at around 3:15pmSaturday afternoon. The trip was coo... I'm lyin' that shit was crazy! Lol but we made it safe and my mans Hot Handz came and get us at the Greyhound terminal. So the first order of business was FOOD! We got some gyros by the house and then headed to the crib to eat and to get the feeling of the bus off our backs. That's when we met The Empire: Dos, Payne, Demari, and Jus were all there. The crib was dope, real nice house, and it reminded me of my or Reg's crib, it's the hangout, the Empire Headquarters. Come through chill, Record in the DOPE ass studio they have downstairs in the basement, or whatever else.
So we chilled for a lil while before we started to get ready for the evening's festivities. "The Empire Livin' Concert Series"at the A&R Music Bar which is in the Arena district in Ohio I believe. Correct me if I'm wrong ya. But yeah, around 9ish we headed out and I must say the Empire had me well beyond impressed. They are more than a team and a family ya. They are a full blown label. At least that's how I saw it and that's what I told D and Mylez. They had a table at the venue with all the shirts, mixtapes, banners and all other information you may need regarding them and their moves. It all made me feel like we gotta grind just a lil harder out here back home. Not that we aren't on that level but it was motivation is what I mean!

^Mylez was Honored to be Invited^

and D and I were Honored to be brought along

The show was Amazin. Everyone from the empire from Handz to Nigel and Nicki Nichole performed. Mylez and D performed a few of their joints and I was just hype to be witnessing real Hip-Hop on a stage, appreciated by everyone in the crowd. So all that was just Saturday.... I'm sure ya wanna know what happened after that right?

Of course you do, but only those involved know, so for now you gonna have to wait for part 2 of the story, coming very soon.... lol, I know you mad, but I got ya! Lol.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned....
P.S. Make sure you click on the links to their name and add em on Facebook or Twitter! Cause I said so!

Privacy and FaceBook Etiquette

2011-03-25T10:16:00.000-07:00

Now before we start, be Honest with me, matter fact forget me, be honest with YOURSELF: How many of you went to "Google" and or some other online dictionary to figure out what the word 'Privacy' meant. Lmao. Cause it's obvious to me that Privacy no longer exists.

Hello I'm Eno Bull, you may know me from such places like, Twitter @EnoBull, FaceBook: Eno Bull, or a nice lil blog called "Tha Bull Pen" (Respect my shameless plugs! lol) and I'm here to talk my ish!
Back in the Sidekick days (Don't front like you didn't own at least one of the 4 or 5 sidekicks that were out) when AIM was still poppin I remember I wrote a blog entitled "My Away Message" - Go ahead click it and check it out, it'll make both of our jobs easier here. Did you read it? Well ladies and gentleman those frustrations have made their way back, except, AIM aint poppin anymore. So where would this frustration be coming from? That's right, you guessed it... FaceBook!

I honestly never thought back in 08 that it would get worse than AIM away messages, but boy oh boy was I wrong. Day after day on this social networking site I'm learning thin gs about people that I never cared to know. Lol. Somethings are funny, some are boring, some are a little frightening and some are just down right inappropriate. However they all have one thing in common, they are allllll private thoughts that should not be shared. This is where the word 'Privacy' comes in. Remember a time when you called a friend or a trusted comrade to tell them your secrets? Or a time when you had a journal or diary and put all your thought down on paper? Remember a time where there was a such thing as closed doors? That no longer exists. In fact I know what some of these women look like naked or half naked. I know what your bathroom looks like and whether or not you decided to clean it before you took your new default/profile picture with your Blackerry.
I know that you have a problem with Jasmine Smith from the 4th floor, I know that your pregnant and your mom doesn't know, I know who your baby father is, I know how you feel about your bf or gf, etc. etc. Please cut it out folks... this goes back to the post I did about the Suckers for love on Facebook. Remember those?

Ladies, Gentlemen, "What's on your mind?" means you type in "Having a great day, it's lovely outside, hope you're all enjoying your day as well." Lmao. Or "I love my mom and my family." Or even "Going to a concert tonight" but telling me that your baby father is a piece of shit, and he didn't show up to court today cause he doesn't wanna pay child support, and that you're so tired of his shit and that you know he caught the clap from his new girlfriend is just tooo much information. You know I'm judging you when I read this stuff right? Lol.

Grammar and Spelling

Here's another thing. Now I for one tend to misspell a few things, I intentionally omit the use of the letter 'g' at the end of words such as "somethin," but some of you butcher the English language and quite frankly I'm effin tired of it. Here's a little lesson for those of you who obviously never walked into a 3rd grade classroom.

I'm = I am
am is not to be confused with I'm

Their = is Ownership
i.e. "Their attitudes suck" not to be confused with "There"

Your = Possession of you
You're = You are
So I would say something about "Your bad attitude", not "You're bad breath"

Did you understand any of that? Of course you didn't. Sucks for you tho, this is not English 101. Go take a class!

But yeah some of you go on rants and everything is misspelled and the grammar is usually straight out of a horror flick. Which only leads me to my thoughts which usually go somethin like this: "This nigga got some nerve to curse out and insult this other nigga but should have his/her head in a damn book, or at least be watchin Sesame Street with his/her children.

Photos of Everything

As a photographer and all round family oriented man, I LOVE pictures. However even I feel like some things are just for you. i.e. Your (see how there's no apostrophe here, You're learning - Isn't this fun?) baby's picture fresh out of the womb is something you print and put into a photo album along with thousands of other memories you will have of your kids. Facebook does not need to see you sweating your weave out giving birth. I mean who even takes these pictures? Lmao. A photo of someone's tomb stone although taken for obvious reasons and is understood is also something that you should maybe keep in your scrap book and or photo album. And b y photo album I don't mean your facebook album. See where I'm going with this guys and girls?
And sidebar, If you're gonna be a hoe, then by all means baby, be a hoe, but if you got that sexy pic where you're topless and you're holding one arm over your breast so as to be "teasing" us, make sure your 3 year old daughter is not sitting on the bed behind you in the picture. Oh yeah, I've seen it!

I really could go on forever, but I'll just leave it at that. Cut the shit folks. If you have beef with someone, be a man/woman and address it in person, or at least over the phone, stop droppin subliminal threats on FB , If You just caught herpes or somethin to that nature, don't share it with us, in fact don't share that with anyone except your doctor. Stop postin the abundance of nonsense that ya post. Be cool fools, It's Facebook, not to be confused by listening ears, diaries or journals. Truth be told, the people who like and comment on your status' are usually laughin at you, not with you. Shit I know I am.

So there it is. Take it or leave it. This was not a shot to anyone in particular, but if you feel it was to you then hey: If the shoe fits, then buy it and go buy a matching shirt to wear em with.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

Sofia's Child

2011-03-20T02:04:00.000-07:00

SUP YA'LL!
So back in January my lil bruh turned 19... Ever since he was 17 I had been promising him that I would get him his first tattoo. Not only did I tell him I'd take him for his 18th birthday, but I designed the piece that he would get (with his approval of course.) Well his 18th birthday came and I was out of a job, so any money I had saved def wasn't going toward a tattoo... But I did promise him so you know I had to/wanted to/was going to deliver. Some time passed and still no tattoo. So in the few weeks prior to his birthday (January 29th) I hustled however possible and got some money together so that I would be able to surprise him with some ink on his birthday.

So the surprise worked out great (I'm a dope surprise planner by the way.) On his actual birthday we got to do the whole outline of the tat. A few weeks later we came back for the shading, and I must say, I'm jealous that I don't have a Tattoo like that on my chest lol.

So quick breakdown: The piece is a shield with the letter "R" (of course the initial for Rudy, his name) and on both sides are the numbers "29" and "92". These two number represent his birthday 1/29/92. The shield has wings coming out of it just cause he and I love wings and we felt it was a great visual to incorporate into it. Underneath it all is a ribbon which initially said "One" to represent the first month, but we both thought that was kinda whack and was pushing the birthday thing too far. So we decided that a good way to incorporate mom's name into his first tattoo, which will probably be one of just a few anyway, would be to put "Sofia's Child" into the ribbon. And so that's what we did. [ATTENTION: REGARDLESS OF WHAT YOU JUST READ THIS DOES NOT MEAN THAT I AM A TATTOO DESIGNER AND I'D APPRECIATE NOT BEING HIT UP FOR IDEAS! LOL]
Great work by none other than Matt. By now if you don't know who I'm talkin bout you just aint been listenin! Lol But before I make this a long ass post just watch the video I put together of it all.

^I'm very proud of this video^

Aside from it being a somewhat tangible representation of the whole experience itself, (me gettin lil bro a tat for his birthday, the surprise etc.) It's the first video I put together myself. With a lil help from Buddy Mylez of course, but you know.... lol. So I hope you enjoyed it. Watch out or us in our V-Neck tees this summer.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

Sofia's Tattoo Story

2011-03-12T13:28:00.000-08:00

One month away from that 1 year Anniversary of my "Unofficial Month of Art and Photography" here on Tha Bull Pen! Damn A Year already? Time effin flies yo... But anyway I was thinkin I've given ya few tattoo stories thus far, (The one about my Guardian Angels, the one of Life and Death, and the one of Pain being Only Temporary) So seeing as how I am a working piece of art and don't plan on stopping anytime soon I would share some more with ya while I'm still "in progress." You effin with me? I'm sure you are.

So today's is pretty simple... I have no problem admittin that I'm a huge Momma's boy (Love You Mom! lol I had to throw it in there) I'll be 24 in August and I still consider my mom to be one of my best friends, if not the best. I never went through one of those "Sheesh, don't kiss me in public, you're so embarrassing" phases as a kid. Nor did I go through the "Dammit I hate you mom, you're ruining my life" stage in my teen years. Mom dukes always been coo, we've had are disagreement of course, like my tattoos being one of them lol. But don't sit there and lie to me by tellin me you never had a few quarrels with your mom. Anyway for my 20th birthday I decided to treat myself to a new tat as I try to do every year (prepare yourselves for the 24th anniversary of life tat!) Naturally I had a billion ideas and spots on my body ready to be done (pause) but instead of gettin that Lion or starting my second sleeve, I though "Let me get something for mom" At the time the idea of her portrait was already in my head but I didn't have the right picture yet. So I went with her name. I called my Ace Mylez and told him we were headed to Harlem, that's where i was getting my tats at the time.

I told My artist what I wanted, simple enough he traced it out and had it done in about 15 minutes. I was a satisfied customer.

Peep:

^20th Birthday Gift from me^

to Me.

Lol I remember when mom saw it she was pissed! She didn't care that it was her name she was just mad that I was staining my body with permanent ink.... But she of course got over it and if memory serves me correct this was the one that made her realize I wasn't stoppin anytime soon. She claims to hate em but if I know her like I know I know her she loves this one in particular lol.

So what's next? Well this arm (Right) has a lot of untouched space. so I'm gonna fill those areas in with clouds and stuff, and around moms name I'm gonna have rays of light shining through the clouds. Feel me? So that's today's tattoo story... I have grandma's name, baby Tamara's name, and Mommy's name.... Pretty soon I'm getting my other grandma's name as well. Aside from them no other woman's name will ever grace the surface of my skin with ink, permanent or otherwise. lol. later fam!

Stay Up, Kiss you Mothers and Stay Tuned!

Gift and a Curse (Like it or Leave it)

2011-03-08T17:48:00.000-08:00

Yaaaooooww!

What's goin on folks? Very random: But have you ever felt like: "You know what? it's not me, it's the people around me who are crazy, I'm perfectly sane! The nerve of this world to make me out to be the crazy one..." Lol I feel like that all the time.
I only ask cause lately things been..... funny, for lack of a better word. Before I go any further please take this time out to pause and look over to the left hand side of this site page. Under the "Who is Eno Bull" section you'll see a disclaimer where I mention the whole purpose for this blog. I may have to revise it but as of now you'll see it states "I love to share my thoughts but I know not everyone wants to hear them so I figured why not have a blog so only those who want to know whats on my mind will know." In other words THESE ARE MY OPINIONS! THIS IS MY BLOG, I CAN WRITE, AND SAY ALL I WANT. IF YOU DO NOT LIKE IT, LEAVE!"
But moving on Lmao... My last post rubbed a few people the wrong way, and quite frankly I'm not surprised. But in a sense I'm glad that it all turned out the way it did because now I have more points to add to today's post. Remember when i told ya I was gonna make up for the lack of posting? Well this topic was already written out in my head when I posted the last one.

The whole point of this one was simply to reiterate the fact that I Eno Bull am an overly opinionated man, and very very VERY often my opinion is different from that of the average person. If you and I disagree does that make me a jerk? If you answered "yes," then guess what, you're an asshole. Check this out. In case you didn't read the "About Me" section I am a man that speaks my mind, I've always been this way. I practice discretion and I know when and when not to say certain things. I of course do not suffer from Tuorette's (Spell Check) syndrome so I don't have outbursts, but if the moment comes where I feel like the need to express how I feel, I do. However (any of you out there that are anything like me know) whenever that moment comes and I speak out and say anything that goes against the grain then Eno's a "Hater."

Of course! Because I feel "The Jersey Shore" is the dumbest shit to ever hit television, I'm a hater. Because I say "Nah, I don't like those sneakers I (IIIII) think they are whack" I'm a hater. Because I tell you that "I hate weaves" now I'm an asshole etc. etc. etc. Really folks? For Real? Why does no one ever stop to think "Hmmm, I didn't know there was a human being alive that felt differently than I did about things in life." Or why does no one ever think "Eno is not a hater, he just thinks for himself!" or I don't know, think what you want, but to label me anything solely based on my opinion of something different than yours not only makes you out to be the ignorant one, but I bet your a republican too you jerk! Lmao! Nah but seriously....

Folks what I'm tryna say in all this is that: We live in a world where people aren't real anymore, everyone is simply a slave to trend and media. Most people don't even know what they like, want or need, they just know that Monclers are the greatest coats of all time, and that if they want to look cool they have to have em on. They don't care for comedy so much but they like a certain comedian because the masses of people say that he or she is funny. Do you really like those sneakers? Or do you see Gucci signs and completely stop caring about the style and the deign and just drop $450 because of the name? Se we live in a consumer based economy, and whatever they try to sell you trickles down to everything else in society. So it's as if preference has disappeared so to speak. You're all robots and I'm still human, I still think for myself and I still make decisions based on my own personal feelings and thoughts not what's "In"
So when I say I don't like this and I think that's not cool, don't look at me and call me a hater, simply think "Well he hasn't been programmed yet, he's still thinkin like a human" It'll be a long time before they get me folks. My opinion is yet to be swayed by the actions portrayed by Trey Songz. Cause he says it's cool don't mean imma go out and buy it.

So again, I'm not the crazy one here, you are. Because I still think for myself and I don't care what the masses say, I still move to the beat of my own drum. Don't call me a hater just cause I disagree with you. And if anything that I have said here today has in anyway offended you, or made you think that I'm not such a nice guy then simply say so (to yourself) and don't come back. No need to try to verbally assassinate me via FaceBook comments and or want to stone me. Simply understand that I disagree and am entitled to do so! Good Day!

Stay up and Stay Tuned!

"Good Hair"

2011-03-07T01:41:00.000-08:00

Yaaaooowww!

I Know it's been a minute but I plan on making it up for ya! But anyway, like I told ya via FaceBook I watched "Good Hair" today for the first time. For those of ya who aren't in the know "Good Hair" is a documentary by Chris Rock documenting the use of wigs and weaves by African American women.
Anyone who knows me knows I HAAAAAAAAAAATTTE Wigs and Weaves, with all the passion, blood, sweat tears and emotion in my body! Fuckin Shit! Excuse my French, but I'm deadass. Perms are not so bad more so because its your hair just fried, but I guess it falls into the same category. Before I go into details as to what was discussed in the documentary allow me to first tell ya why I hate them so much.

To me it's simply a lie. It's deceiving. False advertising even. See to me a weave or a wig says "My self esteem is low, I am my hair, if my hair isn't long and relaxed and "good" then I am not pretty or beautiful like the white women I see in magazines, movie and in Hollywood" when in all reality, beauty is what you make it. I hate to sound cliche but if you don't love you who will? I know a few of you are reading this thinking: "White women use weaves too Eno" Okay shorty, I give you that but do they try to fool the world coming through one day with a short Halle Berry cut and come through on Friday with hair down the middle of their backs? No right?
Like I said it's a lie. I will never forget the day I came home with a lady friend, made myself comfortable on her bed turned on her tv while she got comfortable after a long day of work. Amongst other things she took off her hair and I almost vomited! Ewwwwwlll What the fuck? Aight ladies lemme tell ya what that's like from where I'm sittin: That's like you see me in the street and I meet your every criteria in a man. I'm tall, I have a nice short hair cut, light eyes, rock hard stomach big ass feet and hell you can see my Moose knuckle (Male version of camel toe-so you see the dick print through the pants.) I catch your eye, we speak for a minute and we come home together. I tell you "Sit down baby get comfortable" and as you watch me unwind you see I was walking on some stilts, so I'm not really 6'5", I'm barely 6 feet, I take off my contacts, my eyes are really dark brown like everyone else, my hair line was drawn on and it was one of those wave cap things that made it look short and my hair is really a nappy unkempt mess under that. My stomach was being tied down with a girdle or whatever I would use and I'm really fat. I take my shoes off and I'm really a size 8.5, but I stuffed my kicks with socks so that I could wear the size 11. Oh and you thought I was well endowed? Oh nah baby! This is a small towel I like to keep in the front of my pants... Now ladies, be honest with me, what would you think and say? Honestly?

Another reason why I don't like them is because they don't really serve a purpose. They aren't medical solutions to hair loss, they don't help the hair grow longer so that some day you don't have to wear them. They are strictly and solely used for vanity. I'm sure alot of it also comes from the fact that growing up i never saw my mom or the women in my family using wigs and weaves, so to me its like "Really shorty? You don't get down like the old school?"
So I wanted to watch "Good Hair" because I was hoping it would teach me something I didn't know and maybe shed some light as to why women (especially the black ones) wear them. Because believe it or not anytime I ask them I get the same BS answers like: "Well I get bored easily, so this way I can switch it up." Or something like: "Well this way I don't have to do anything to my hair I can just get up and go" Bitch cut it all off and call it a day if its like that then.
So pretty much Chris went to a few different cities and discussed the issue with several hair dressers and salon owners and I must say I learned just a few things that I didn't know. Like: did you know that the chemicals in a perms are strong enough to take the color off of a can of soda? Even disintegrate it? And some of these vain women even put it on their young daughters as young as the age of 3. Chemicals that could literally burn through the skin. I also learned how expensive some weaves can be. I knew they were expensive but I saw one that started at $1,000 and could reach up to $3,500. I mean for that sticker price I better never get a headache ever again and this shit better eventually fuse with my real hair and root itself into my scalp. It documented how some women will skip on paying the rent to be able to afford these extravagant weaves. Disgusting to say the least.

So next up was the trip to India where most of the "Human" hair comes from. And to me that's even worse than any other type of hair.... To me it's like sharing used condoms. That's hair that was sprouted from the scalp of another person and now its mixed in with you hair? You nasty bitch! But anyway, apparently in India the native have all had their hair cut off completely at least twice in their lives by the time they are adults due to religious reasons. One man in particular capitalizes off of this and sells all the hair that is cut off. That's a LOT of hair and in turn a lot of money. There's even a black market where another man and his henchmen are thieves and stoop so low as to cuttin peoples hair in their sleep to be able to sell it. Are you serious? In india the hair business is more lucrative than gold! WOW!
The whole thing was just preposterous to me. To think that society and Hollywood has our Beautiful, nappy headed, once wore Afros, black women so messed up into believing that their hair makes them look prettier, or pretty period. Is natural really that bad? All in all I didn't learn too much from watching "Good Hair" but i did enjoy it because it reconfirmed all that I had been saying from the beginning. It's not so much about helpin a situation as it is looking good to please others. So to those of ya who are sitting here sayin: "No I don't do it to please others, and I don't do it to look beautiful, its just my preference" nah fam, have a seat! You may think you doin it for you but you doin it for acceptance and for the satisfaction of others and don't even realize it. It's a sad truth but I guess this is what we live with.

With all that said I still HATE Wigs and weaves... Perm are cool but dammit the risk you take in getting them is ridiculous. It's mind bogglin how it still such a big thing with women knowing what they know.
But like all else that you read on this blog: "These are just my opinions and views" take it or leave it ladies. I still love ya, I just hate ya hair.

Stay Up, Go Natural if you Dare, and Stay Tuned!

How High?

2011-02-11T13:42:00.000-08:00

YOOOOO!

What's goin on Ladies and Gentleman?

I just wanted to share with my followers that I'm working on a mini Documentary and I want as many of you to be a part of it as possible. The Documentary is a "Smokers Appreciation" of sorts, and I want to release the project to the public on 4.20. For those of you who don't know of 420 it's the international day of weed smokin, recognized by people in subcultures (Smokers) throughout the country. So my plan is to get some dope "Eno Bull Photography" pics of people smoking along with a short video interview with them to put together as a documentary. So for all those interested I'd appreciate if you contacted me via email for further details. Thanks in advance. Hope to hear from you guys and girls soon.

^The Flyer I Made^

Email me @: EnoBull@gmail.com

Stay High (I mean Up-lol) and Stay Tuned!

Moment 4 Life

2011-02-09T20:31:00.000-08:00

YOOOOAAWW!
What's goin on Bull Penners!?

So the other day (actually a week ago tonight) I was in the lab with D and Mylez. About a day prior Mylez had mentioned that he wanted to spit over the "Moment 4 Life" beat from the Nicki Minaj song. He said he wanted to work with D on it and so that's what took place, after a little over a day of the initial discussion.

D had been listening to Buddy's music since about 03 so he's been dying to work with him on a track. So pretty much this song was 8 years in the making and it shows.

So the song was recorded, mixed and mastered on Wednesday night and on Sunday we finished the video for it! Talk about work ethic lol. It's been getting some very dope review and has been watched a lil over 300 times. So I really wanted to share it with ya. To me it's an amazing track. It has such a genuine NY feel and the imagery is so simple and I think that's what enables it to speak such volumes. I think you'll agree. So check it out.

"Moment 4 Life" by Deascent and BuddyMylez

[CLICK THE YOUTUBE BUTTON ON THE BOTTOM RIGHT CORNER TO SEE ON BIGGER SCREEN]

Ya Know BEMedia had to take care of this one and its only the beginning of a new day in Music, Videos, Media period. Hope ya enjoyed it. Support me by supporting my team, and don't forgetto follow my niggas on Twitter:

@Deascent
@BuddyMylez

Peace Ya'll!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned

History Repeats Itself

2011-02-07T20:11:00.000-08:00

Before I say anything I just have to mention: I was in the car for about 60% of my day today and while switching from Hot 97 to Power 105 I thought to myself "Cot damn, is there only 7 songs in existence right now? I think imma just start reading." (No I don't read, so what? lol.)

Anyway in a moment of silence this cutie walked in front of the car. Nice light skin face, short black hair, nice lil body and of course as I watched her walk away and possible almost caused an accident I saw that she had an ample back yard! Lolol. So when I snap back to reality I tell Mylez: "That's nice, I would wife that!" Lmao. I wasn't fully serious of course cause I don't know that girl or anything about her. Shit, she could be an axe murderer. But you get where I'm goin with it. Shortly after, I struck up a conversation about attraction. And I had a revelation, I explained to Mylez that I've figured out a problem with myself (if you wanna call it a problem) but the problem or situation is: I have a bad habit of getting caught up and interested in the women who don't share the mutual attraction with me. I swear it happens all the time... Remember the blog where I mentioned the Untouchables? Well yeah, that's the case, I see a girl, possibly holla, get to know her and think to myself "Hmm, I can see myself workin out a lil situation with this girl." Lol only to realize that on her end she doesn't see me as anything more than a friend. I'm just the nigga she can come and tell allllll her problems to, joke and be herself around but not the nigga to call her man. Ain't that a bitch? But then I ask Mylez is it just human nature? Cause that's what I been callin it for years. Liking the one who doesn't like you, and ignoring the ones that do like you. Is it a vicious cycle or can something be done.

He mentioned something along the lines of trying to be attracted to something else, and I mentioned: "That's impossible, it's inevitable, I can't control what I'm physically attracted to" and he said "I think you can." I understand where he's coming from to an extent, but I still feel strongly about my thoughts on it. Its like you see a car that you've never seen before. It doesn't have any logos or decals to give you an idea as to what it is, but you know you like how it looks. Naturally, you have little to no control over that. He of course said we do have control over that. So I guess I decided to leave it at that. But it lead me to think deeper into it. Why do I keep falling prey to my own preference? How is it that I'm attracted to what I know isn't attracted to me? Crazy right. I mean I've been in this position way too many times. Shit the last one I fell for probably knew I was feelin her but I didn't even say anything, because I knew she would hit me with the "I'm not really looking for anything serious right now" or the "I don't see you that way" or the "We're just friends" or my favorite "I didn't know you felt that way, but I appreciate your honesty" lol, Which means "Ewwl Nigga, the nerve of you to assume I'd deal with you on a higher level than I already am!" I mean, it takes a toll on you after a while so when does the moment come when I say "You know what this one aint as cute as that one, but she down for me.... Imma run with her." I don't know. Buddy said if I keep finding myself attracted to the girl who doesn't work for me there's nothing wrong with them, there's something wrong with me. And as hard as it is for me to admit theres something wrong with me (I have a looot of pride) I guess this time he's right, there's something wrong with me. I guess all these years the fellas have been right, I'm too picky. (Lol, you know I still don't fully agree with that) but whatever. If being attracted to beautiful makes me picky then hey *Eno Shrugs*

So I guess this all just balls down to a question, do you think you can control being physically attracted to a person or different people with the same physical attributes?

I can admit I'm shallow, but you can still go for a swim in my depth. I'm not saying I wouldn't deal with a girl who isn't "traditionally" attractive, cause I would, but like I always say, based on initial sight I go for the cutie pies. Am I wrong for always falling for her type?

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

Her Ugly Face

2011-02-04T00:22:00.000-08:00

These words stumbled across my train of thought earlier today and so I thought I'd share them with you. This post may have some language that's in appropriate so brace yourself. You may Judge me after this one but you know I don't care. Hope ya enjoy.

It was a Tuesday afternoon and she had just came out of school. All our talks on the phone and via text went a little something like: "I'm gonna put it on you" "Yeah aight, you say that now but imma put you to sleep..." she might have even said "You aint ready for this Pussy" or something along those lines, etc. etc. Regardless, all those conversations lead to this moment. The moment of truth... Is she gonna front? Do we even like each other that much? Are we gonna speak after we're done? Who knows? Shit, who cares? All I know is that the soldier in my pants is standing at attention, with a mind of his own. He's waiting for what the general in my head has told him is cuming to him. lol.

I tell him: "At ease soldier, in time you'll be needed but lets not scare her with the guns out just yet!"
I say "Hey" she says "Wassup?" I reply back and we head back to my place. We sit on my bed and pretend to watch TV for about 15 minutes before my hands begin to wander without my consent. But she doesn't mind, in fact hers start to wander as well. Before you know it she's sitting on top, my hands caressing her back while she takes off her shirt and I un-do her bra. We're kissing, despite the fact that I'm not big on doing so. My eyes opened, thinkin "Take your clothes off and lets do this" while hers are closed tighter than who knows what. I could only imagine what's going on in her head. She's probably thinking "Oh my God, I can't believe it's finally happening!" Poor thing. So off comes the bra and without the ice cubes I get my "Mookie" on "hello left breast" and "Hello right breast!"
I tell her "take your pants off" she does, and the tight jeans are accompanied by the little thong she was wearing. I proceed to do the same and she proceeds to perform oral sex! (For lack of saying she started suc.... You see where that was going.) When she gets up from doing what she thought was a good job, I grab the future preventor that was waiting under my pillow. I put it on and then I put it on her. We do what we do for a slightly extended period of time. I'm not overly attracted so I'm surprised I've stayed up this long. But before too long I see she's gotten hers, and now I'm gettin mine. Damn, even with these broads I try to show sexual etiquette. Lol. But I'm done and just like that allll the feelings I had for this girl, the desires to beat, the dirty thoughts, everything for her was left in the condom that I threw in the waste bin at the end of my bed.

Maybe had I known her for at least 4 days I would have offered her conversation and something to drink. But I barely knew her for 60 hours, and by now the only thoughts going through my mind are the ones of getting this beautiful stranger out of my house where my family lives. This of course is the face of lust. She's ugly and un true, but she's as real as the illusions she places in our minds.

Funny, I never saw her again. Lust has showed her face again, but none of the women she introduces me to stick around long enough to make a lasting impression. Damn, what was shorties name? Oh Well... let this be a lesson to ya. Not everything that shimmers is gold. Be careful out there folks.

-Based on a True Story-

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

Fall from Grace.

2011-01-23T13:16:00.000-08:00

So for those of ya who don't know, every Sunday for 2 months now I've been going to a writers workshop called Acentos writer. It caters more so to poetry but I feel it helps tremendously with my "free writing" style. Plus it always such a dope time spent. Anyway today's facilitator of the group was a young man named Raymond Daniel Medina, and he told us to write about "The Fall of Grace" (the story of Adam and Eve) and so that's what I did. I enjoyed the exercise very much and I learned about using more detail in my writing. We were told to write in the perspective of someone or various people in the story, so I want to share with ya what I wrote.
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I think I've got her. She knows the fruits from this tree are forbidden but now she's considering her fall from grace, even though she doesn't know. She's going for it and I can see the innocence draining from her eyes without a single tear shed as she chews from the last bite she'll eve have in my garden. She's calling Adam over and he'll surely do as she asks of him. "Amazing" I think to myself, I've corrupted two by simply speaking to one. This game will be easy, the game of taking over this world filled with weaklings and mindless mortals til this entire world beyond this tree is mine.
Adam reluctantly bites the apple. It's written all over his face that he knows he's done wrong. They've realized that they're naked, and that's my Cue. I've gotta go now, their Lord will surely return. He is their creator and now that they've been given that knowledge my work here is done.

Could it have been the dry scent of sweetness that made me do it? It was such a refreshing taste, the sound of it crushing between my teeth, the scent of my unknowing demise coming over me as I saw colors more vibrantly , heard the birds in the trees more clearly, saw he rays of the sun gracefully sneaking in through the empty space between the leaves over me. Adam just HAD to share this euphoric experience with me. So I told him: "here Adam try this apple. I think I've just discovered the first drug!"

With a tone of authority, I have returned to my Garden. I find my children hiding, they do not realize, even with a new found knowledge that I AM the all knowing . I ask them "why do you hide?" They reply to me "because we're naked." "Who told you that you are naked?" I reply with a strong tone in my voice.... They are struck by silence. I now know that my children have disobeyed the only law that I have set in place. Is this what I can expect from all my children? Maybe the "Free Will" thing was a bad idea. However, "Adam, you and Eve shall no longer live in thine garden. You will wander this world as exiles of your beautiful home and bare a sign on your forehead letting everyone know that you are disobedient." They have looks on their faces that just break my heart/ But I have to be stern in my ways. They gracefully take their fall from grace and leave to a world where they will start wars, create famine, poverty and endure hate from it all. What have I created? I suppose I shall call it Humanity.

So yeah! lol, Hope ya liked it.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned.

Just Wanna make you Smile

2011-01-20T19:24:00.000-08:00

I'm pretty sure most of ya don't know the process behind my writing. Or do ya? Well allow me to share it with ya. (Have ya noticed how personal I've become with you in these past few weeks?) Anyway for me writing is literally venting. An escape from reality. Writing is my attic and my words are Anne Frank. I don't write much poems any more, nor do I write stories fictional or non fictional. Could I? Sure I could, but for me writing is opening up the flood gates of my mental state, allowing my hands to catch whatever they can hold and placing those things on paper. Sometimes my hand catch sounds, and those sounds translate into words as the pen strokes over paper or the cursor flows over blank space on the computer screen.

Not too long before I began writing out this post I had a random thought of the women I like. So I figured I'd open up the flood gates and put the gloves on my hands.
I can't say I have a "type" for me, my type is Female. I love all women, slightly younger (19 and better please), my age or even older. Short, tall, round, slim, short hair, long hair, (as long as it's hers) dark or light skinned, Librarian look with the glasses or whatever. If it catches my eyes I am attracted.

But there's one look that I just cannot deny no matter what the physical packaging is. And to me that's the "I'm from the Bronx, but my clothes is from the corner of 5th Ave. and 50th St." look! OOOWWWEEEE! (Gimme a minute. Don't touch me) lol
To me there's nothing sexier than a woman who knows, wants and has the finer things in life. You know the type I'm talkin about. She's lived on the 4th floor of your building or the building down the block for as long as you can remember, but you never see her chillen with the other girls on the block. You've seen her in passing but no one really knows what she's about. Some may think "That bitch is conceited" and everyone knows her name but NO ONE knows her game. I See you baby!
You may see them on the train with some sexy ass heels, a nice clutch, a sleek fitted pea coat some shiny shades that you can just tell cost her a grip. She may not have a dollar in the bank but her style is so grown and sexy you don't even care that those jeans cost her the phone bill for this and next month! lolol.

I call those girls "The Untouchables" because no matter how humble she may be once she decides to let her guards down, the truth remains: She's Rose, and I'm Jack. I'm a third class passenger on this ship of life and it's gonna take some sort of life saving and altering situation for her to realize that I'm standing here in front of her. I say it all the time: "Human nature is a bitch" I could have had a thing for Gina from the block, But the one that caught my eye was Raven. (Fake names by the way) And Gina is not only right up my alley, but she feelin me too! But nah: Raven got that walk, and she don't wear too much make up, that nude lipstick works so well for her, and geeze louise the way she switches in those red pumps with the black skinny jeans and the over sized blouse is doing it for me. Lol.
Anyway I say all that to say, I don't have a "type" but I can assure you that a certain style most definitely catches my attention! I mean shorty in the Jordans and the Yankee fitted can get it too, but... well you see where I'm goin with this right?

And to all the Ravens and Roses in the world. Us everyday Joe's just wanna make you smile baby! Don't shut us all down, some of us are pretty cool! lol. Stay up ya!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

A Little Me (An 80's Baby)

2011-01-17T10:12:00.000-08:00

"A picture is worth a thousand words" -Somoene long ago-

"Yes a picture is worth a thousand words, but there's more to it than that. A picture is the closest thing we'll ever have to time travel. It's not a DeLorean, but by looking at a picture you can be taken back to a moment in time that has been gone since the flash subsided. It is the capturing of a moment that would have been lost and will never return had it not been saved by the lens of a camera. Pictures are treasures that remind us of a time before now. It's one of the biggest reasons I am a photographer today" -Eno Bull-

It really bugs me to know that there isn't too many pictures of me from the time I was around 3 til the time I was around 14. I think to myself: "What will I show my children?" In fact when you think about it picture themselves have changed. Seeing as how technology continues to grow by the day, picture aren't even printed anymore. All we have is FaceBook and our camera phones which will someday surely die out. This is one of the main reasons I became a photographer. I vowed to have pictures of me and my whole family. Especially my cousins, my little brother, so that when we have kids they can see what we looked like when we were there age. Bet you aint know that did you?

So the other day, Michelle (a very good friend of the family and my ol babysitter) posted a few of my baby pictures on FaceBook, and it made me feel so good to know that my baby pictures are still around, even if they're not in my own crib. Ya wanna see em? Of course ya do! lol

^One of my first Photo Shoots^

^Where you said you need my hand?^

lol

^Apparently I was having a bad day^

I knocked everything down from the wall unit

^Stop taking pictures, Please just give^

me my bath

^Hallway monitor^

Ah Ah Ah! Where you goin?

^Partying with my main lady^

My first love, Mommy!
And you thought Jim Jones was the first one to rock the
'Color Purple" braids! Nah Son!

^Aight Mom, I'm tired^

Lets get outta here!

^I still be walkin around with no shirt!^

AAOOWW.

And that's Michelle, peep the hair! lol

^Me and Michelle 2 Weeks ago^
Thanks a mil for the trip down Memory Lane Love!

Call me conceited if you want.... But Cot Damn I was a gorgeous baby! Makes me confident that my children will be beautiful too. Well that's all I have for ya today. Hope ya enjoyed my baby pics, and if you didn't You's a hatin ass Crab! And ya breath Stinks! lol Later Folks.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

What Women Want

2011-01-16T10:00:00.000-08:00

What's goin on fam?
Got another one I wanna share with ya...

So, it was my homies birthday yesterday. We were talkin and she began to reminisce on past years. Back in high school I really had a huge crush on her, but that's as far I got with it. Back then I must have been uglier than I am now, cause the only stories I was bringin home were the ones about how I liked shorty and almost said something to her on the bus lol. But I digress. For her birthday one year (back in high school) I got her this huge arrangement of a dozen flowers, with a card, and waited for her to get off the bus to hand em to her, or something to that effect. A few niggas walked by and laughed at me, and some of my boys asked me what the hell I was doing carrying these heavy ass flowers. I let em know what the situation was and they laughed too... Lol but you know me, my attitude aint new, I aint care about niggas thoughts of me back then either. So finally shorty gets off her bus and there I am looking like a contestant on a "I wanna Find Love" reality series on VH1 holdin her flowers. I hand them to her, she gives me a kiss.... on the cheek (Word?) lol and we walk to school.

Now I'd tried to kick it to this girl once or twice before but I guess I wasn't gettin the picture, I was determined to get her, but even this 3 ft. long dozen of flowers that weighed about as much as a new born wasn't enough.

So she asked me if I remembered that. I told her, "Of course I do" and she continued to tell me "Damn, no other guy has ever done that for me before, I mean my ex did it, but only once..." so I put on the "Damn" face. You know the one widen your lips, raise your eye brows, shake your head a lil but! lolol. And thats when it hit me: "I just realized, I've been a better boyfriend to some girls without being their boyfriend than their boyfriends were/have been. Crazy right?" I started thinkin, "Damn Eno, you's a sucker nigga!" lmfao. I have no problems admitting to ya that I am a sucker for love, there, you happy? I said it. But after High School, that changed. I'm still the same sucker but only those who I choose to be mine and accept me as theirs will receive that treatment.
So no, I aint gettin you no damn flowers, No I aint writing you no damn poems (and I can write a meeean poem), no, I aint going to sleep on the phone with you listening to your problems, them days are over. I played the nice guy and I barely finished the race let alone finished last. I realized yesterday AGAIN, that Women do NOT want a nice guy. They don't want the guy who does all those things I just mentioned, because it makes him appear weak in their eyes. They don't want that guy because more often that guy lets himself be walked all over. And I assure you that's not the kind of guy I would be anyway, I'm not weak and you can't walk all over me. But that doesn't mean I'm not a nice guy. Instead they want the bad boy, or the thug who's gonna disrespect them, curse them out, cheat on them and or occasionally put his hands on her. Lol, ladies please don't lie, its the truth, cause guess who shorty from my story ended up with.. That's right the nigga who sailed and bailed! I don't need to put her business out there like that and that's not what I'm tryna do, this is about me. It just amazes me of how many girls I liked over the years that I didn't get for one reason or the other. The only common denominator I could think of was being too nice.

So excuse me if I don't show affection as I should in the early stages of courtship, or in situations when it's "just sex." I'm not blaming women, but I am tellin ya I've been there, I've done that... It's only so long you can go on losing the race before you realize "I need a new method." In fact now that I think about it, me fighting so hard to get shorty and not winning back then is probably why I don't fight for the ones I want now, I'm such a pacifist when it comes to that, I figure I aint gonna fight for her if I don't see her fighting for me. I guess that's life right? We live and we learn, I learned the hard way, but now for the most part its F*&k em all... No no no, not like that, I mean literally! lmfao! Later bitches, and ladies! lol

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

I Love You baby! XOXO!

2011-01-13T09:15:00.000-08:00

Gimme a minute as I zone out to "You've been Robbed" by the Notorious B.I.G.....
(You should play it as you read what I'm about to write) 3mins 58secs later.

Alright, We're all here? Are we refreshed and calm? Well I'm bout to ruffle all your feathers back up!

I was called a hater today, not once, but twice maybe 3 or 4 times.... "Why?" you ask, I'll tell you why, because I spoke my opinion, and in this life when you do that that's what people call you. Lol, In fact it says that right there in my mission statement to the left (<). It's the whole reason I even started this blog.

Now as for the situation:
I woke up and like I usually do I turned over, reached for my phone, replied to about 4 or 5 text messages that I got while I slept, checked my email and hit Facebook. This is what I do before I get out of my bed and get my day started. So I log onto Facebook and of course I see a few of the same people posting the same lovey dovey, "I miss my baby," "I Love my boo" statuses, okay that's cool. So I decide to fight it with sarcasm and I announce that I will be posting some statuses just like that, as a form of satire of course. (This is when I was called a hater)

And just like that, at around 9:33 this morning I lit a fire under a few people's asses who hadn't even had their coffee yet! I see you Angie baby! Lmfao. I was called a hater, and I was told to stop and all that good stuff.
So before I continue and lead you to believe that I am some sort of heartless bastard incapable of love and you say I don't know what these people are going through, let me tell ya about the last time I was deeply madly in love. (I've never done this before so bookmark this page if you have to)

Her name was Stephanie. My ex girlfriend... We got together around the time I was 15 and we broke up a lil after I turned 18. Stephanie was my first true love. I aint know what it was to have a real girlfriend before her, I had never felt for another human being what I did for Steph and that's how I knew it was real love. You or no one else can convince me different. I woke up and I felt it was cause of her, I had to hear her voice on the phone before I got out of bed, I had to hear her voice on the phone when I went to bed at night. I wanted to feel the warmth of her hugs. This was real deal Hollyfield! Did I tell her often how much I loved her? Yes I did. Did I tell her often how much I missed her and how much she meant to me? Yes, of course. But that's where it ended. This was in the Myspace and AIM days, so I say that's where it ended because I didn't feel the need to post a 2 paragraph away message telling my whole AIM buddy list how much I loved Stephanie, nor did I feel the need to make it a status on everyone's wall on Myspace. Feel me? How me and her broke up is another story all together so I won't get into that. I simply shared that with ya to say this: What you feel for your spouse should be special and sacred between you and your spouse. As long as your girl or your man knows what you feel for them that's all that matters. You shouldn't promote it all over the internet. In fact doing that makes me think, "Well damn, how much do you really love this person if you can find the time to tell Facebook about it every 15 minutes, shouldn't you be trying to spend some of that time with your baby?"

It annoys me, I see them doing that the same way I see overly flamboyant gay dudes. Its excess... If your gay your gay and that's fine just don't throw it in my face. If you in love well then Cot Dammit that is so beautiful, truth be told I can't wait to be in love again, but please don't throw it in my face. Feel me? Think of it like this: Say you were rolling with someone all day, in your car on the bus or on the train, chillen with your bff or bestie or whatever ya callin em these days and all this person can tell you EVERY SINGLE 10-15 minutes is "Oh my God, I love my boobie," "I miss my boo," "I can't wait to get home and give my baby a kiss and a hug" Well damn bitch! You know how many minutes there is in one day? 1440, divide that by every 15 minutes that's 96 verbal status updates your friend is giving you in one day. You know good and Cot damn well you'd be tired by the 5th one! Am I making this clear to ya?

Aside from all this, these are the same people who can't stand the sight of their significant other just a short 6 weeks later. REALLY? It goes from "I Love you baby" to "Niggas aint shit, it's all about me, I can do better by myself!" Tss, so what ya calling love I call an energy drink. Shit gets you hype and excited and you feel like you can fly for a minute then when the high is gone you crash so hard. What was the point? Take it day by day man, and keep it within the one heart ya should be sharing, don't promote it off billboards on the highway. Cause lemme tell you there's about 3 people on your facebook that really care anyway! the rest are just looking at you like "look at these fools." I know a few of ya don't agree with what I said here today, but that's okay, that's why I have a blog, only those who have a genuine interest in what I have to say will spend some time out of their day reading what I feel. It also says that in my Mission statement to the left (<). Remember folks love is only 4 letters long, but its a VERY VERY strong word. if its true in your heart keep it close, letting it go and throwing it around every where is an easy way to break it.

So what you call "hating" I simply call a failure of acceptance of the truth. You know I'm keepin it real anytime I open my mouth. Enjoy those around you folks. Be safe out there.

Stay Up and Stay tuned

Untitled

2011-01-11T16:15:00.000-08:00

FIRST AND FOREMOST ALLOW ME TO STATE THAT THESE ARE THE LAST WORDS THAT WILL EVER BE SPOKEN BY ME ON BEHALF OF THIS SUBJECT.

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I woke up today in a great mood... Life was good, I had (still have) air in my lungs, and I woke up with the 5 senses I went to sleep with. But ya know this is my life I'm talkin about, nothing that begins well ever ends well...

I had no plans today aside from meeting up with Mylez and heading over to Dwayne's crib to get started on the filming for his second video. D doesn't live too far but we wanted to shoot in a few different spots and the idea of walking to all of them or walking to and from a train station all day wasn't at all pleasant.

So I figured I'd ask Rudy (my mother's husband) if i could borrow his car. I walk to his room and ask and get shut down, Shocker right? That's fine, I don't care, I would have been more surprised had he granted me the permission to take it. But I digress... I walk back to the living room and sit down to wait for Mylez, who would have driven seeing as how all I have is a permit and I don't have my contacts in, so I can't drive.

He follows me back out from his room and asks me what I need the car for. This is not unusual at all, in fact he always instinctively says no to any and everything, and then decides to think and inquire as to why someone would request anything from him. So I explain to him: "I'm going to Dwayne's house, and then we have to go to Intervale and one other spot, we're gonna be shooting a video." He then asks: "Do you get paid for that? All I hear is videos and pictures but I don't see shit" (by see shit he means revenue) I replied: "Listens its okay, I'll walk I don't need the car" because by now I had already tuned him out, then came the dagger through the heart. "You gotta find a way to do something for yourself, do something with your life!" FUCK YOU MOTHER FUCKER!

The nerve of this nigga! He doesn't know the first thing about me, if it weren't for the fact that he sleeps in my mothers room he would just be another fucking strange face on the streets. It would be a different story if he knew what my goals and all my hopes and dreams were but me and this man have never had ONE conversation.... That's not in anyway shape or form a joke, an exaggeration or lie, my (I say this with great hesitation) father and I have never had One conversation and we've been living in the same household together for 23 years! So where does he get off trying to tell me that I have to do something with my life.

I know he has no idea that this blog even exists, I mean shit I claim for his unemployment every week via the internet because he doesn't even know how to turn a computer on. But I wish he did so that he can read these words: "I am gonna do something with my life, as a matter of fact scratch that, I AM doing something with my life, and no it doesn't pay as much as it should right now, but when the faucet opens and pours down on me its gonna pay more than you've ever seen in your entire life, and guess what? Unless my mother decides to share her portion with you, you won't see one red cent!" I mean that from the deepest and darkest corner of my beating heart.

I used to lie in my bed and ask God how he could curse me with the father he did, but now 23 years later I realize that it wasn't a curse, it was a blessing. God has given me the blueprint of the man NOT to be.... The father and the husband that no one wants. Thank you Lord, I appreciate what you've placed before me. The lesson you've been trying to teach me all these years has been learned.

So I don't want his car, in fact when I get home I'm gonna take the spare keys that I have and put them back on his night stand, I don't want his money, I'd much rather starve than to buy a piece of bread with any money that comes from his pocket, Lord forbid I were ever to catch fire and he be the only person around to save me, because I would much rather die by burning to death than to know I was saved by him, I will not owe him my life a second time. I just don't know what hurts more, knowing that I lost my father today or knowing that I never really had one in the first place. Peace

and btw I walked to my boys crib, the shots for his up coming video came out great. It means more to me than he'll ever understand because to me its beginning marks the first day of the rest of my life. Theres only one way to go from here and that's up, and when I'm there I'll be too far to see those who didn't believe in me. Dueces ya!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Flowers for the Dead

2011-01-06T11:02:00.000-08:00

I was on the train last month and the thought of my baby cousin Tamara came about... I tend to think of her from time to time and it makes me a little sad. Sad because I think of the great life she'd probably still have had she not passed away 8 years ago. So like I often do when I feel deeply enough about something I wrote about it. I typed it out on my phone and just kept it there til today. So I figured I'd share it with you guys. I entitled it "Flowers for the Dead" because although its about her I mentioned my grandmother, uncles and a friend of mine Ronnie, all of whom are no longer here with us. So this is "Flowers for the Dead"
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You would have been 12 this year, 13 next month in fact... Gone too soon is what we all said.. Damn I still can't believe your.... 7 years later and that's still the 4 letter word that I can't say. I miss you baby girl but the pain that I feel is only a candle in the sun that is your mothers pain. I swear not one time have I seen her flash the same smile that she would within the short 5 years you were with us. Another man would curse God. Curse him for taking away my uncles, my grandma, my man from the block, my aunt's beautiful smile, but worse of all your life. I mean damn it barely even began.... But I'm not an atheist, I wouldn't curse my God. I just have to make my peace with him and understand that he needed you and all those other people more than I needed them. I guess this is just my flowers for the dead, hey look I said it... Your all gone but your never forgotten. Tamara I love you baby girl. It hurts 100 times more than the needle that tattooed your name into my skin just knowing your gone. They say God takes all the great ones first, which explains how I could possibly outlive you. But til we meet again, I love you baby.... Happy Birthday.

^Tamara^

May she Rest in Peace

I was debating whether or not I was going to share her picture with you guys, but I figured it couldn't hurt.

Stay up Folks.

Listening to Progression

2011-01-04T19:24:00.000-08:00

What's going on Bull Penners? How's work treating ya for those of ya who had to go back already? Well I got some nonsense for ya to slack on wit!

Ya remember a few months back when I told ya I had plans of stretching my ears (lobes) right? If you don't click right here son! Aight well Around Early November (I believe) I began stretching. As you can see I haven't documented it too well lolol. I just know that I've gone through a few tapers already and honestly I'm happy with the progress thus far.

So with the help of my little brother's girlfriend, who also has been stretching her ears, I've been steppin it up every couple weeks. My homegirl Bebe told me I might be moving too fast tho, so after the last ones which I put in on December 5th I slowed down a bit. So the next ones will be going in sometime during the middle of the month.

Thus far the experience of having them has been cool... to me at least. Some people disagree with it and even say some things that would be hurtful if I were the type to allow words to hurt lol. Others say: "You know? It doesn't look that bad!" some just stare, DWAYNE! Lmao, but for the most part the only complaint I can think of is how much this shit hurts when its first put in. It stings like nobody's business, and it makes it a lil uncomfortable to sleep, unless you can manage sleeping coffin style with your head directly on the pillow facing up (which I can't) lol

^Took Pictures of all the Tapers I've gone through so far^

I'm not 100% sure if these sizes are accurate so please don't kill me if I'm off.

^My last two default pics^

I don't have too many clear pictures of me in them because like I said I haven't been documenting the progress til now, but I enhanced these two (^) a bit to show ya how they look. I'll try to take more pics of me in them til I reach my goal size which is half an Inch! AAAOOOWWW!

So yeah man, that's my ear stretching progress so far.... Oh and before I forget, got some videos for ya of me getting them put in!
Check em out:

^This is from when I got the sz. 4G tapers^

^This is the most recent when I got the 0G tapers^

[CLICK IMAGES TO ENLARGE]

My video editing skills suck major ass right now so bare with me. lolol

Stay up and Stay Tuned Folks!

2011 is Home!

2011-01-03T02:56:00.000-08:00

HAPPY NEW YEAR MOTHA LOVAHS!(POURING CHAMPAGNE ALL OVER YOU AND YOUR CAR LIKE CAM IN "PAID IN FULL")LOL

Whats good baby? Did ya miss me? Ya shouldn't have I been here all along! Well Two oh, double one is here, another 12 months of doing what we do (hopefully living life to the fullest) Cause like my home girl Reese said: "Aint shit changed over here" lol, but that's another discussion all together.

As ya may or may not know I'm super family oriented and I take any and all opportunities to hang out with them so like every other year that's what I was doing on the eve of the New Year. As far as family goes, I have 2, the one God gave me, and the one I chose, and they are who this post is about. Not really much I can tell ya about my boys that I haven't already told ya in the past.

Lemme break down the event to ya: Che hit us all up in an effort to unite us for a Section 8, 4T'Reign, BXL annual reunion. Now if I lost you bare with me... As you all know BXL is the 3 man group made up of Joe Dirt, Severe Jones, and Buddy Mylez. But before they were BXL they were '4T'Reign' which was the same 3 plus a 4th, the 4th being Che.... And before they were 4T'Reign, they were Section 8, which was all 4 plus Mayo (who went by Epidemik at the time) and my boy Zo Dot. So there's a quick lil BXL music history lesson. For lack of a better word there's just been some down sizing. So the whole idea of the reunion is to vibe out and reminisce over the old days with some video games and drinks thrown in the mix.

So Che hit us all up on facebook to invite us and we all of course RSVP'd: YES! lol. We linked up (like always) at head quarters, Reg's Crib! Played all the old songs, remembered what went down around the time they were recorded, had a few drinks while we played Street Fighter ii on Che's Super Nintendo (I think it might be mine but that's also another post all together lolol) and of course whats a night with all of us together without a (Pause) long, heart felt session of serious Ass cutting! lol.....

So the guest list was as Follows: Reg (PBM), Che, Zo, Jayo (Epidemik), Severe, Dirt, Mylez, Devo, Blaze, Penny, Jun, Myself, and a few of the ladies from the circle were also in attendance, Mel, Stace and Emily. We got together on Thursday, the eve of New Year's Eve. Lol. It was an amazing way to seal the year off man, ya already know I love time spent with my nigga. So With all that said and done I'd like to share the pictures I took with ya:
They're not in any particular order:

^No Shoes past this point, Reg don't play that with the carpet^

^DJ Che Kidd on the 1's and 2's^

^Che getting it in '92 Style^

^We had to come up with 5 Stacks for a Devo Diamond walk through^

^Joe Dirt playing Che Kidd^

^You Know I wear my Crown!^

^Focused^

^Hennesy and BlackBerrys^

^Jun playing Jayo^

^Melissa the BBM Fiend^

^I call this one:

Penny for your Thoughts^

^Penny on 2k11^

^I call this one:

"Since Grass Hoppers"^

^Down+Right+X^

^The Tournament^

^Big ass bottle of Corona

nigga at the store gave it to him with the Sparkles!

^Peep our Sounds^

^These Boots Made the night Kidd!^

LMFAO!

[CLICK PHOTOS TO ENLARGE]

I really couldn't begin to explain to you how much fun I had and how much i laughed this night, I laughed so hard I thought I was gonna die! lmfao! Guess it was one of those "You had to be there" nights. But really, It was a great wrap up to a great year. Ya already know I don't do the whole "New Year, New me" bullshit, Imma just continue to live my life like I always have. I hope 2010 treated ya well, if it didn't you got another 12 months to put your foot up the ass of all your dreams! lol. AND, my blog turns 3 years old this year!

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

Early Morning Thoughts

2010-12-29T03:38:00.000-08:00

So long ago I grew tired of this monarchy. The one that makes me a surf or a peasant to a king, a queen and thier precious prince. To hell with it, soon i'll sit in the thrown of my own kingdom, where I won't have to eat from the Prince's left overs...
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That was something I needed to get off my chest. But while I'm here, so rarely do I get the chance to blog my thoughts as they come to me. So I guess I can do that now.

Favoritism is a bitch and I think I'd rather have one child and spoil him rather than to play favorites with one. It's 6:06am right now, I'm hoping this young lady will wake up and call me and tell me to come over, cause if the sun comes up before she does I'm staying in.

The other day while waiting at the bus stop I came up with the idea for the tattoo I want for the right side of my neck. See I've always wanted a neck tattoo but I didn't want to use that space for any words or names. I feel a neck tattoo should be a dope image, no offense to any one who has otherwise. So for me it's been hard because I'm a sucker for angels, but I didn't want to be accused of copying Pharrell's neck tat. Hmmmm, so what should I get? I love the idea of wings but I'm not gonna just put a set of wings on my neck.... So that day at the bus stop an idea landed on my shoulder, an idea to have a neck tattoo that incorporates wings with my love for my great city NYC! BAM! What was it? Lol you'll know sooner than later. And before you go preaching about how I should think about it because neck tattoos aren't professional, please save your breath, I thought it through and I want nothing to do with corporate America any way. I'm gonna be professional in my own way. Although there is this girl I like who said she dislikes neck tats. Hmmmm ya wanna know about her?

Lol, I'm not gonna drop names, plus if she's reading this she knows it's about her cause she's sharp. I think that's one of my favorite things about her. I see you baby. (Moment of weakness, moving on)

I fucking hate liars yo, and I know everyone says that but I'm dead serious I can't stand em.... remember the frontin force blog? Yeah, LIARS. But I guess I can't be mad some people are just wired differently.

I feel like I've been betrayed by a man I've called my brother for over 10 years, over a piece of ass. I can't be mad at the female in the situation cause a whore will be a whore, but damn homie, just like that? Let's play Eno for a fool huh? Aight.

My ears are killing me, and I don't even feel like they're stretched out to the size I want yet. Why did I start stretching my ears you ask? Would you believe me if I told you I've loved the idea since I was a 12 year old in 7th grade? Yeah, my teacher had her ears stretched and I thought it was the coolest thing ever. So after having my ears pierced for the past 8 years rocking the studs that I loved, I figured "try something different" and so the stretching has begun? Got a problem? Get in line.

I have some ideas for some photo shoots, I'm, gonna make it happen. As hard as it may be, I'm gonna make a living out of being a photographer. I believe in myself.

People please stop putting every last aspect of your life on facebook, it's getting ridiculous.

Well it's 6:34 now the sun is gonna start creeping soon and I think I'm done venting. So thanks for spending this time with me.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned!

"Those the new Jays?!!"

2010-12-23T13:50:00.000-08:00

Dude A: (Looking at Dude B's Feet) "Ooooh snap son! Yo money, those are the new Jordans?"
Dude B: "Yeah man, these the new Joints"
Dude A: "Them joints right there is fly son! Where you got them?"
Dude B: *Laughs* "Nah c'mon, you know I can't tell you that!
Dude A: *Laughs* You right, Imma find em tho, Peace G.
Dude B: Peace.
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R.I.P

to the Good Ol Days

Lol, Whats going on man? I know I'm not the only one that remembers those good ol days am I? This one is more for my true Sneaker Heads but I'll try to make it so that everyone can relate.

So today is the release date of the Re-Retro Cool Grey XI's. For those of ya who don't know what that is, please hang in there I'll post some pics later in the post. Now I had seen pictures of them on a few sites, and I saw one or two people wearing them and I must say "I am NOT impressed" maybe I'm just getting old and been out the sneaker game for quite some time now but I think those sneakers looked 10 times better when they originally released back in 2000. (This of course is just my opinion) I feel like Jordan's Empire has been slowly crumbling for a few years now. Allow me to explain to you why I feel this way before ya come at me with the pitch forks and torches.

See I'm an 80's baby, I came up in the era of ORIGINALITY. When I was a young buck Jordans were the crem de la crem baby (Spell check on that.) Of course being under Nike's wings, Jordans were nothing less of mind blowing quality. Premium leathers, top quality suede, new technology and innovation with every pair. Shout outs to Tinker Hatfield (Google him.) Back when I was a kid the biggest complain I had concerning Jordans was the price tag, and that was simply because I didn't have it to spare, but even at that age I understood that my mom was payin $100-$150 for some great quality product, not because of a name brand. Feel me?

I feel like ever since Gentry Humphrey (Google him) came into office we've been (excuse my French) Fucked! See after a while the Retros (re releases) were using cheaper leather, slightly altered shapes, and we lost the "Nike Air" logo on the earlier ones. Don't get me wrong they weren't all bad but for the most part quality was reduced in an effort to make more profit. No one can convince me otherwise. I mean how else do you explain the same exact pair being re released 5 or 6 times? And how do you explain Spize'ike after Spize'ike and all these bumass Fusions! No offense to anyone who owns or wears these, but c'mon, they could have stopped at the Dub-Zeroes.

I mean its like my cuz Z said, Jordan just keep raping the hood. I feel that by now most people don't even care for the sneakers its just more of a status thing. Niggas wanna feel like they doing it with their Jordans and matching fitteds and skinny jeans. Again no offense to anyone who does any of this, just voicing my opinion. So I'm sure you wanna ask me "So you don't buy Jordans anymore Eno?" Truthfully? nehhh, I've either had them already, never wanted them or don't like the post 2006 version. So if I come across some 99 retro White Cement IV's I don't mind droppin $400 for them and I'd do that before I drop $150 on the new Space Jams. Then again, like I said earlier, maybe I'm just getting old and I been said I was retired from this sneaker game anyway.

I will admit tho, I miss the days when you didn't even have to look at the logo, you KNEW that was the new Jordan. You aint have to see Jordan even play in them you just knew. If the Fresh prince of Bel-Air himself, Mr. Will Smith wasn't wearing them, Martin sure was. Oh, I'm sorry, was I the only one looking at their feet? I remember when my cuz Perse got his XIII's, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't mad I aint have my own pair. I remember when I saw Buddy in his True Blue and his White Cement III's, yeah, you know I was tight. Especially when he came through with the Quick Strike low cut black/metallic VI's and the Tim Duncan Spurs Jersey! OOOWEEE! Jun had the Laney blue and the Black metallic 5's OH SHIT! I'm sure she doesn't even remember it, but my homegirl Jaquita came through to New Years or Christmas (can't remember which one it was) with the OG Retro Cool Grey XI's CLEEEEEEEAN! Oh man. Lemme take ya back real quick. I remember back in kindergarten (92-93) this one kid in my class Jeffrey used to get allll the Jordans! lol, Fly lil nigga, and I remember I asked him "Those are the new Jordans?" He picked up his foot and placed it on top of the table and said "Yup" lmfao! Yes man, I been into this since I was 5. Ayo Perse if you reading this, remember Edwin used to stay in some fresh Jays, he had the Columbia XI's? the all white joints with the baby blue strip on the tongue? Oh man. See man, I'm smiling right now just remembering all this shit. Those days are gone tho. My cousin Mario had the Aqua 8's when they first dropped in 93. His brother Kelvin damn, i can't think of the pairs he didn't have. Original taxi XII's, OG White/red XII's, in the OG red and black Nike Box. OG Black/Red XIII's, and this is back in the days when niggas was getting robbed for their Jordans, we still wore em proud with the baggy jeans and the matching shirt. LOL My mom bought me 94 retro I's and I didn't even know what they were til years later when I saw myself in a home video wearing them. My lil brother had OG Indiglo XIV's, OG Cool Grey XV's. Oh man, good times for kicks baby!

Am I just getting old, cause I def don't feel that way anymore. The era where you just had to walk into your local sneaker store and ask "Yo, the new Jordans is out yet?" or check Jordan's feet, or check the sneaker magazines are gone. We have the internet now, which shows you the picture 6 months in advance, which in turn creates mad hype for a pair of kicks that aint even as hot as they were when they first came out. Yeah I think I'm just getting old. Its's coo, I guess everything in life has its run right? I just wish this generation knew what it was like back in my day, back when it was quality over quantity. The feeling you got when they FIRST came out. I guess I say all this to say Retros were coo, but they don't hold a candle to the Original, so you can Imagine the Re Retros don't hold a match to the retros lol, Where will it end? What are my son's Jordans gonna look like? Well I guess that's my rant for now. Mr. Michael Jordan, I will forever love you sir, and I will continue to be a fan of your early production of sneakers, the ones that YOU played in and a few of the retros you released. Mr. Tinker Hatfield, THANK YOU! I can't thank you enough sir. Mr. Gentry Humphrey, my mom once said :"If you have nothing nice to say don't say anything at all" but my mom aint here: "Fuck you dude!" Good day sir. lol

Peace ya'll:

Check these pics out before ya go.

^AJ I^

^AJ III^

^AJ VII^

^AJ VIII^

^AJ XI^

^JORDAN 6 RINGS^

^JORDAN/AIR FORCE FUSION 5^

^IDK WHAT THE FUCK THIS IS!^

^^All images provided by the Flight Club website^^

Flight Club
[CLICK IMAGES TO ENLARGE]

I want to take this time out to remind you: "Wear what you want, this is just me voicing MY Opinion. After all this is my blog, I can say what I want Motha Lovah! lolol

Stay Fly, Stay Up, and Stay Tuned Folks!

Happy Holidays

Loose Screw

2010-12-14T18:45:00.000-08:00

So I get a text from my big sis Imani earlier today. She was telling me that she wanted to be a guest blogger tonight. I was very excited... I've always been a fan of her own blog "I'm just Saying..." *COUGH even tho she neglects it like a step child *COUGH lol. And the fact that she wants to bless all my readers with a guest appearance made me feel honored. So with no further delay my big Sis' Imani's post.

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One day I decided that I should try therapy. It’s not that I couldn’t have used it before then but at the time in my life it was nearly mandatory. I had seen people on tv and in the movies with a therapist and figured it was the new black and I should have one immediately.

Session one:

I went in and cried through my story just like on the movies. It was great! I took long pauses, stared at that ceiling- every woman knows that there you gather the strength to stop tears- and generally looked to this woman for help. She took notes, listened intently, took more notes, handed me the roughest tissues my eyes have every felt, asked a couple of background questions and told me that she was going to do everything she could to get me in every week. I was a grade A mess.

I finally had a therapist. Mission accomplished and I couldn’t wait to tell people.

Session two:

I didn’t cry too much but I was all upset like I’ve seen in the movies. She told me that I was probably feeling anxiety because I wasn’t breathing and she was right. I was literally holding my breath. She gave me breathing exercises. I felt pretty cool because I had therapy homework and I called and told everybody all about it.

Session three:

I’m totally over this woman. She is not probing me like they do in the movies and we are literally just staring at each other. Granted, it was insurance paying for this, but I had free staring contests on the school bus in grade school. Hell, I still stare at the people that stare at me. It became obvious that this just isn’t going to work.

Session four:

There was some a water outage in the building so the session was cancelled… fine by me.

Session five:

What session five? I called in and cancelled all remaining sessions.

In conclusion:

Do I still need therapy? Probably, but if its not going to be like it is in the movies then there will just be one more emotionally unstable person running the streets. When you see me, say hi. I bite but I never break skin.

-INC-

Dallas!

2010-11-26T22:06:00.000-08:00

Yooo! What's good Fam? How was ya Thanksgiving? I hope ya ate like Mobsters before the "Unfortunate" death of an informant! lol I know I did...

Anyway, I'm not gonna speak much on Thanksgiving, I mean what can I possibly say that hasn't already been said about the holiday by everyone else? However I will say this: It was an amazing evening spent with my entire family. And if you know me you know that means the world to me. And Speaking of Family:

DALLAS IS HERE! WOOOOO! LOL

^Where it all Started^

2:30am? Keeping his parents up already lol.

"Dallas you say?" Yes! Lil Baby Dallas Anthony, my new nephew, the latest addition to the family.
So when I get home from the Thanksgiving celebration at my aunts house I get on the computer of course and see whats goin on (like I aint know it would be a bunch of post TG reviews) on FaceBook and right before I decide to sign off I came across Perse's status message that read "Baby Time" hmmmm... So I thought, "Did his wifey go into labor?" The baby wasn't due for a few weeks, and I had just been joking with her about her water breaking that night... lol, But anyway I text'd Perse, discussed the situation with him and he explained to me that she was in labor at the hospital. I offered to drive over to be by their side but he told me it was too early. So I went to sleep and without missing a beat text'd him as soon as I woke up. Asked how things were coming along, hoping that I didn't miss the birth of my beautiful nephew. He told me he still hadn't been born so I told him that regardless of how long it took I was gonna show up and spend time at the hospital with them. So I chilled for a bit, got up, walked Juno and thats when the text came in "My son is here!" Naaaah man, you serious man? Shit! lol, I missed it, ahh well, I got ready, packed my camera bag and asked my pops to give me a ride to the hospital. When I got there I was kindly told that the patient (Perse's wifey) had been moved to another hospital..... "Thanks for telling me Perse!" (whispers under breath, "fuck") lol. So I go back outside, hop in a cab and head over to the new location. When I got there I told the lady at the front desk what the purpose of my visit was, she told me where to go and off I went to the third floor. I made a left at the elevator, right at the corridor and God knows what else before I found the room where my lil cuz in law lied in bed, while the new Daddy and grandma sitting along side of it hovered over my new nephew......

Damn son! My cousin got a son! It's such a crazy feeling... And if this is how happy I am for him, imagine how happy he is. I give my sis in law a kiss, give my aunt a kiss, give my cousin Perse dap and a hug like I aint seen him in 10 years man! And that's when I saw him, the man of the hour, all 6 pound 7 ounces of lil baby Dallas Anthony. That kid was white as hell boy! Lol. Looks just like all his fathers baby pictures lolol. I didn't carry him cause carrying new born babies scares the crap out of me.. lol but I did speak to him and watched all the smiles in the room as I recorded his little movements and took pictures of him with his family.

I went outside the room with my cuz and hugged him again, so happy and proud that he's a new father. We chopped it up for a minute and went back to being in awe over the new life that has entered the world on the cold afternoon of November 26th, in the 2 thousandth and 10th year.

I mean I've seen my aunts have babies before, even my cuz Julie, and of course a few of my niggas, but Perse is like my big brother, (not that the rest of ya are not) so it felt different seeing him hold his own seed. No offense Julie lol.
I'm Still in awe, and for the most part don't really know what to say aside from the fact that I'm very happy, and proud of my cuz and his lady. Just another thing to thank the big man above for during the Thanksgiving holiday. I mean he was born on Black Friday, it can't possibly get better than that... So God, like I said last night: "I wanna thank you for blessing me with another day of life, I wanna thank you for my Parents, I wanna thank you for every last member of my huge family, and I especially want to thank you for bringing Dallas into this world today (yesterday) a completely healthy baby with 10 fingers and 10 toes, and making my family that much bigger." You the man God! Thank You!

^Baby Dallas and Daddy^

I would give ya more picture but they're being saved for the parents.

[CLICK ALL PICTURES TO ENLARGE]

Welcome to the world Dallas Anthony.... You got a huuuuuuuge family, get ready for life with a bunch of crazy Hondurans lol.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned Folks.
P.S. For those of ya who don't know I have a huge infatuation with names and their meanings. I don't know why or when it even started, but something about names intrigues me, and theres something about the name Dallas That I Effin Love man! Great choice in naming him ya. I love ya. Take care of my nephew. Perse we already spoke so you already know. Later!

The Frontin Force

2010-11-19T01:32:00.000-08:00

Lmao... what's goin on Bull Penners? How's Life treating ya?

I was having yet another convo with my big bro Buddah. Like it often does the conversation came to a detour, that detour being the "Female" highway... Fellas, I know ya know been on that road many many times before. I spoke to him and as I was speaking to him I realized how many (please excuse my French) frontin ass bitches done fronted on the butt with me. Now don't get me wrong I get's mine, but every now and then I come across the one that talks a good game. So when it comes to the day where I'm supposed to come through and cash the check that their mouths wrote the shit bounces like a muh f*%#er!

Ladies this is what's called frontin... See, we're in a new day in age where girls do just as much talkin as some guys. Me personally, aint much talkin with me, I feel the element of surprise is much better. So I'm not gonna be sitting here telling you how imma put it on you and how imma do this and that. I'll give you an idea as to what may go down and assure you you'll enjoy it, but I aint gonna give you a menu. Imma surprise ya ass and put the food on the plate in front of you. So a few females I've come across recently have been playing this game saying shit like "Oh, wait til I catch you," "You not ready for this," "You gonna be fiening after I give you some of mine" blah to the blah blah blah.

Now as a man and a huge pervert I love this shit lol.. Of course! But here's where the problem comes in ladies: you say allll of that and I reply with a simple "Okay" and as soon as it's time to collect you on some "oh I was just playing," "Nah I can't today, I got a fart stuck in my ass" or "Nah, next week baby, I can't tonight." Don't get me wrong, I know for a fact that life happens and certain things prevent you from puttin my dick in your schedule, but BOTH times I ask tho? Yeah, there's rarely if ever a 3rd chance with Eno.

So I asked big bro "Ayo man, is there something I'm doing wrong? What about me is attracting such frontin ass women?" He replied with an "I don't know man, your one of the most honest and straight forward dudes I know... maybe it's cause your keeping it too real." I was confused and asked "There's a such thing as being Too real?" lol..... The convo went on but naturally I felt: "You can't be too Real.. Real is Real" I don't know...

But anyway, I say all that to say this: ladies, if you want the pipe it's as simple as saying so, and if you don't it's as simple as not saying things that will undoubtedly lead me to believe that you do. Get it? If you fronted on me and owe me butt you know who you are, I don't have to put your name out there for the world to know lol, I mean I'm a gentleman anyway, I wouldn't do that! But for the rest of you, I will leave you with this question: Is there a such thing as being too real? What did my bro mean when he said that? Do you agree with him? Why do you think these girls are frontin? Okay its more than one question but help me out here lol.
Shout Outs to all of ya who kept it real and didn't hold out on the butt... I almost wanna put ya names out there cause the sex was good baby! I see you sittin there blushing, but lol, in the same respect I won't.

Stay up and Stay Tuned Folks!

What's going on with You?

2010-11-12T13:34:00.000-08:00

Lol... before I begin this one lemme give ya my disclaimer: First and foremost this one maybe a lil stronger for whatever younger audience I may have! So under 18 may or may not be admitted without a parent, lol. There I said it.

Secondly, I'm not sure if I've touched this topic before but I didn't feel like going through the 216 post that came before this one. So if I've discussed this already I apologize but the topic came up again and I felt the need to discuss it.

On to the post.
This is a topic that's been hovering over my head for quite sometime... It doesn't bother me in the least but sooooo many people (male and female alike) tend to suffer from it. This is not an illnes or disability, but I guess it might as well be. You know what I'm talkin bout..... Trying to understand the opposite sex!

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.... I didn't read that book, but the title pretty much summed it up for me. It's the truth.
Check this out on countless "Game Nights" with my cousins, aunts uncles and close friends, the topics of Cheating and the differences between men and women come up. All the girls get riled up, talking nonsense about how men do this, men say that, "I don't understand men." Well sweetheart from me (a man) to you (a woman) that's because you over thinking things. There's not much about us to "Understand" we're very simple, but that's another topic in itself. Meanwhile the fellas in the room have smirks and smiles on their faces, all thinking "We aint complicated to understand, It's ya who's hard to understand"
I usually stay quiet lol. Cause like I said "WE ARE NOT DIFFICULT TO UNDERSTAND" But check this out fellas as sure as the sun will rise every morning there is a female reading this right now thinking the same exact thing about us. She's thinking "we're not difficult to understand either" am I right or am I right ladies?

^My contribution to the Trending Topic^

Which leads me to Twitter. As you may or may not know, Twitter has trending topics and every now and then people decide to go off on some of them. The new one that indirectly caught my eye this week was "#MistakesMenMake" of course the women are having a field day. As the men are having with "#MistakesWomenMake." Now I've had enough of all of this a long time, but I guess recently it's all just built up now I'm ready to let out one of life's secret which apparently the world hasn't figured out. You ready for this one?: As mentioned on my FaceBook months ago: "I've realized that Men will NEVER understand women. I've also realized that Women will NEVER understand men. guess what folks? It's like the late great Tupac Shakur said: "That's just the way it is!"
See I'm a man who believes in God and I trust in him, I know that he makes NO mistakes. Anything he's created (human beings included) has been purposely done. So I do believe he made it so that men don't understand their counterpart and vice-versa. He did however intend for us to procreate and keep humanity alive for generations to come. So for those of you who don't understand what I just said, The Lord above did not put us here to understand each other, he put us here to make love and babies. So shut the eff up, stop wondering why your spouse doesn't get you and go love each other folks. It's that simple.

Stay Up and Stay Tuned....

Sweet Sweet November

2010-11-06T14:21:00.000-07:00

YOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I'm MAD Hype! lol.

So the other day I woke up to a Tweet mention from our boy AJ (@jdimag - Follow him.) It was attached to a Twit Pic of the brand new 'New Era BXL' fitted cap. WHAAAAT!? I knew they were in production, and I knew that there was various concepts as to how they would look. But I had almost forgotten that I saw the blueprints. So I immediately woke up, and looked at my teams hat in amazement. I couldn't believe it, i felt as if i had just been signed to the Yankees or something.

Anyway, So Buddy text'd me and said lets go pick up these hats... I was ten steps ahead of him, I zipped up my jackets, drove up the block to get him and we hopped on the 95! We met AJ at his office where the box of black BXL fitteds sat. We took em outta the box and just smiled. I can't begin to explain how excited I was to finally see something that just started out as a simple idea come to life in a tangible thing that I was now holding in my hand.

For those of you who aren't in the know, New Era is the company that provides all the MLB (Major league Baseball) teams with the caps that they wear with their uniforms on the field. They've become somewhat of a fashionable accessory with the general public. They of course are not limited to just baseball... They also have NBA team fitted, and most recently NFL. Nike has now bought New Era so naturally they make hats that match sneakers.

But before I get besides myself giving you 'New Era's' history (if you don't know about them google it) let me continue explaining to you about our fitted.
See me, I only wear Yankee fitteds, for the exception of maybe 2 or 3 others that I've ever bought.

Supreme amongst many other have had collaborations with 'New Era' and now my team is amongst that elite.
Naturally I feel what Buddy said "I love the Yankees, but I don't play for them, this is MY team, my team has its own fitted now" VERY TRUE.... not to say I won't wear a Yankee fitted anymore, but once all the new colorways of my team's hat come along...... Well you see where I'm going with this. Anyway, I've rambled long enough.

Check out the hat:

^Looked at this like my Signing Contract lol^

No Words Needed

*Remember to always take the 'New Era' sticker off your brim*

I literally am still at a lost for words, despite all the ones I managed to put on this page. Lol
AJ thanks a Mil man! You the muh Effin man! lol

Stay Up and Stay Tuned....

He's a Pro She's a Hoe

2010-10-29T11:58:00.000-07:00

Guy 1: "Yo, you know I took her down right?"
Guy 2: "Woooooord?! Ha! That's crazy fam, you got her and all her friends right?"
Guy 1: "Yessir, all 7 of em, they don't suspect a thing"

*That man is Thee Man!

Girl 1: "So yeah, I let em have a piece"
Girl 2: "Oh my God, that's the third nigga this month, you better relax!"
Girl 1: "I know I know, imma slow it down, you know I aint no......

*Yes she is! Lol.

What's goin on folks? Ladies this one is for you. Tell me how you feel about it.

So recently I was with my cousin and a good friend. The good friend (a female) asks, "Why is this the double standard? How is that a man can have sex with so much women and he's the man, but if a girl sleeps with 3 men she's a hoe?"

Then today the same subject came up on Twitter.

Aight ladies, lemme break it down for you. YES! It is a double standard? BUT its important that ya remember we (The Promiscuous men) did not come up with that double standard. I mean me personally I don't see anything wrong with a girl gettin hers like I gets mine, but lemme break it down for ya.

You see in my eyes, and in the eyes of many men, a woman is something beautiful and extremely sacred. Whereas a man is just another man. Do we respect each other? Of course we do, but as men we're not really caring what the next man is doing.
So it becomes a matter of understanding why another man would do what I would do; but I don't wanna think of women, who I tend to put on a high pedestal doing what I'm doin, which is sleepin around gettin man milk from any and everyone who will give it to her.

So my friend (who seemed to understand a lil better, I hope lol) asks, okay, "but then why is the double standard fair for ya but not for us," or something to that nature. So I continue to explain to her: "Well somethings just are how they are and that's how they'll always be"

I.E. Ladies you get up and say "Excuse me, I gotta go to the bathroom" its perfectly okay for your friend to follow you. Correct? Lord knows what ya doin in there.... But I can't get up and say, "Imma go to the restroom" and say to my man "Ayo bruh, come with me." Not that I would even want to, but c'mon ladies be real you gonna look at us like somethin aint right.....

Another example, at a party setting, Club, lounge whatever, its perfectly normal to see a young lady dancing close with her friend... Crotch to crotch, or crotch to butt, no one calls them gay or looks at them funny. However if me and my mans are dubbin on each other......... Aight C'mon, you get it right?

Another aspect to this whole subject is how one carries themselves. Regardless of how many men you sleepin with if you a hoe then imma call you a hoe. If you and I have something goin on (regardless of it being serious or not) and then you let my man beat then you already know you aint nuttin but a slide.... Being considered such disgusting trash could have been avoided by simply avoiding letting 2 different niggas that's close beat.... So if you respect yourself i'll respect you. But yeah, at the end of the day, like I said some things just are the way they are.

The Sky is and always will be blue. Because the sunlight that hits the ocean reflects and bounces back up into the sky.
Men will always be needed for a woman to reproduce. Because asexual reproduction is not how humans are wired.
Some things are how they are and there's nothing we can do about it.

Ladies, like I said, me personally I don't see anything wrong with you gettin yours. Shit I know a few females with slightly bigger booty call rotations than some men. I don't judge them, and I don't look at them in a negative light. As far as the negative light its all due to a lot of us (Men) seeing you as better than us, so we expect better from you. Get it? I hope I've shed some light on the subject. I effin love ya ladies.

Stay Up beware of your number lol and Stay Tuned.

My Concrete Jungle

2010-10-27T01:47:00.001-07:00

I was thinkin, you notice I do that a lot? But I was wondering, why would a man travel thousands of miles to visit parts unknown and study animals in their natural habitat. I mean I guess I understand the nature of curiosity, but if you really wanna study animals, I say come to NYC!

Out here you see things, things that might remind you of the Discovery Channel. We have Lions, Tigers, Snakes, monkeys, rats you name it I've been on the train with it! And who can forget mating season, I know a girl who's been pregnant more than Katherine Jackson, and aint one of them damn kids gettin her out the hood. Lol. Sad right?

Mating calls? "Sup Ma? Can I Holla?" S'That simple!

Invisible borders? Of course, Don't cross the el train, the wolves is wildin on that side. Its feeding time and your on the menu.

Parasites? We call em Bums, watch em ask you for a dollar.

Vultures? Let's just say we call em haters. Watching you, waiting for you to fall and spoil over so they can eat you up and laugh about it.

We all just animals one way or another. I'm a Lion, in more ways than one. Some are rogue hunters, and some hunt in packs, but like everything is a hustle we all eat one way or another! New York, New York, My favorite Jungle. National Geographics hasn't discovered you, but I wouldn't trade you for the world.

Stay Up, Watch your back, and Stay Tuned Folks.